Today, in astronomy class, a kid used Uranus in a hilarious innuendo. I was the only one who laughed. I also happen to be the teacher. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, in calculus, our substitute teacher told me I was smart. Everybody in the class, including my friends, burst out laughing. FML
Today, as a natural science teacher, I was drawing a uterus on the class chalkboard. One of my students started messing around and being noisy, so I shouted, "Be quiet and check out my uterus!" FML
Today, in physics class, my teacher was messing around with an air cannon and I accidentally blurted out, "Blow me!" It took me all of 5 seconds to realize why everyone was laughing. FML
Today, it was the first day of astronomy class and we all waited for the professor to enter the classroom. All of a sudden, someone turns the lights off, it's pitch black, and we hear the professor saying, "Greetings earthlings..." It's going to be a long semester. FML
Today, as I went into my calculus class, the teacher announced that someone had received a negative grade on the test we were getting back. I laughed and said, "Which f*cker managed to get a negative?" Turns out I'm the dumbass. FML
Today, I stood up in front of the class and dropped my pen. As I bent over to pick it up, a boy in the front row loudly broke wind. I will forever be known as "that teacher who farted". FML
Today, while teaching my high school class about astronomy, I showed them a picture of earth from space. One girl raised her hand, and asked me what the "white things" were. In other words, clouds. FML
Slipping up
Today, I was teaching a class when a student pointed out that I'd used the wrong "your/you're" while writing on the board. FML
Indoctrination?
Today, we were discussing evolution at the super-religious school I'm forced to attend. I mentioned homo sapiens, and my teacher mockingly replied, "You actually believe in homo sapiens? Hahahah!" The whole class started laughing. No, not at the teacher; at me. FML
RIP
Today, I thought I was all alone in the class, so I lifted up my leg and ripped a huge fart. One of my students was still in there. He told everybody. FML
Top comments
sharkgirl4 23
You must have looked like an ass
chinaski7628 32
No-- it would be 'your anus'. Possessive pronouns still exist in space.
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Comments (75)
footcheezeez 16
Dammit... I thought the kids name was Uranus... lol
Brandon1337 29
You sound like a cool teacher. Now I gotta know what's the joke
mister_icicle 17
How is the USS Enterprise like toilet paper? ;-)
MossyMegaMan 20
My science teacher gets innuendos, swears like a sailor, never forgets our names, gets sarcasm, talks about fights he got into, tells awesome stories, and couldn't care less if we curse or make sexual jokes. He is the most liked teacher in the entire school.
TheDevilWearsJoe 8
You live. But what was this innuendo?
fortherecord1 5
Mr. McKay? Lol
gigithepotato 5
I can assure you that you are the coolest teacher I've came across.
bbmj420 0
Are these students even awake?
looms123 9
I once asked a teacher what colour Uranus was. That got me in so much shit.