Today, in astronomy class, a kid used Uranus in a hilarious innuendo. I was the only one who laughed. I also happen to be the teacher. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, in calculus, our substitute teacher told me I was smart. Everybody in the class, including my friends, burst out laughing. FML
Today, as a natural science teacher, I was drawing a uterus on the class chalkboard. One of my students started messing around and being noisy, so I shouted, "Be quiet and check out my uterus!" FML
Today, in physics class, my teacher was messing around with an air cannon and I accidentally blurted out, "Blow me!" It took me all of 5 seconds to realize why everyone was laughing. FML
Today, it was the first day of astronomy class and we all waited for the professor to enter the classroom. All of a sudden, someone turns the lights off, it's pitch black, and we hear the professor saying, "Greetings earthlings..." It's going to be a long semester. FML
Today, as I went into my calculus class, the teacher announced that someone had received a negative grade on the test we were getting back. I laughed and said, "Which f*cker managed to get a negative?" Turns out I'm the dumbass. FML
Today, I stood up in front of the class and dropped my pen. As I bent over to pick it up, a boy in the front row loudly broke wind. I will forever be known as "that teacher who farted". FML
Today, while teaching my high school class about astronomy, I showed them a picture of earth from space. One girl raised her hand, and asked me what the "white things" were. In other words, clouds. FML
Today, I was teaching a class when a student pointed out that I'd used the wrong "your/you're" while writing on the board. FML
Today, we were discussing evolution at the super-religious school I'm forced to attend. I mentioned homo sapiens, and my teacher mockingly replied, "You actually believe in homo sapiens? Hahahah!" The whole class started laughing. No, not at the teacher; at me. FML
Today, I thought I was all alone in the class, so I lifted up my leg and ripped a huge fart. One of my students was still in there. He told everybody. FML
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Top comments
sharkgirl4 23
You must have looked like an ass
chinaski7628 32
No-- it would be 'your anus'. Possessive pronouns still exist in space.
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Comments (75)
ilmanator 7
so what
sharkgirl4 23
You must have looked like an ass
mattlikesfunions 22
I get it
jerryj 27
Really #16? Cause I surely don't. Could you please explain it?
Tipperson 8
DDDDOOOOUUUUCCCCHHHHEEEE^
badluckalex 23
people really need to get used to the amount of sarcasm in the comments
soccer_isbae 15
Honestly if my teacher laughed at that I would have liked him/her more. I like when teachers have a sense of humor!
FmlYdi4ever 15
That's why there is kappa. Kappa means sarcasm.
MossyMegaMan 20
My science teacher gets innuendos, swears like a sailor, talks about fights he got into, tells awesome stories, and couldn't care less if we curse or make sexual jokes. He is the most liked teacher in the entire school.
stupidface15 16
it's **you're** anus. i hate this modern lingo
chinaski7628 32
No-- it would be 'your anus'. Possessive pronouns still exist in space.
Bloink 25
you are anus?
TrippingOnAcid 29
I think they were making a joke. Like people who use "ur" in text speak? It's too bad #5 still used the wrong *your
23lf 16
******* Idiot + Grammar Nazi = #5
MaybeMoo 13
@5 Considering it's the name of a planet and not "modern lingo", no, it wouldn't be "you're anus". Even in a sentence that was relevant to that it still wouldn't be "you're anus", it'd be "your anus" like 22 said.
stupidface15 16
smh you people have no sense of humor
lengi123 18
55 - stupidity doesn't always translate to humor
stupidface15 16
64- You're anus.
mister_icicle 17
.... he said to his can of Spam.
johbstonjacob 8
We all gave a 10 year old inside of us....
A07 48
Pretty sure it's just you, sorry.
AnOriginalName 19
I'm pretty sure that's illegal, #6.
badluckalex 23
and this thread of comments we have exibit 9, the prude
CoGhostRider 31
#6 as long as it's not Uranus...
Tthug 34
Reminds me of Russell brand singing African child/inside of you.
RedPillSucks 33
I've got one locked in my basement
hoopfrog 14
#37 Why does this not have more up votes?
KayDee29 31
I'm curious as to what the innuendo was now....
Bloink 25
they pulled the innuendo right out of their anus
StiffPvtParts 43
#21 They pulled it from Uranus c:
paigexox0 37
I dont see it as an FML, the students probably like you more because of it!
BrookieAnn 19
It just shows you have a sense of humor, which is generally lacking in professors .
thespiantess 18
Yes, I'd be glad to be in your class. I used to tell stupid chemistry jokes to my teacher all the time and it made classes so much more enjoyable.
Enslaved 38
"I took asstronamy just to study Uranus"
Bloink 25
omaigad i love this comment like i love bacon
Ichiya 29
My science pick up line is: If I had to be an enzyme I would be DNA helicase so I could unzip your genes. ;)
CarlyMarDry 16
You seem like a cool teacher.
PenguinBitch 44
I thought they changed it to "Ur-rectum".
fsomelife 26
"Let me find it for you on the smell-o-scope!"
PenguinBitch 44
You know what's up. :D