Today, I woke up with bowel problems which have been causing me to violently pass wind every couple of minutes. I have to spend the next two hours sitting an exam in dead silence. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after having stayed up all night studying, all the coffee I'd drank to keep me awake hit my gut with a vengeance. I ended up missing two exams because I was emptying my bowels into the toilet all morning. FML
Today, during a silent exam, my stomach made the loudest, most embarrassing growling noise possible. It was so loud that the professor looked up and some people in the room turned to look at me. The girl next to me offered me a granola bar, and I accepted, even though the growl was actually me desperately holding in a fart. FML
Today, I was absolutely busting to poop, so badly that I began to sweat. This was while I was sitting a medical exam, and had to write in depth about the mechanical and chemical process of digestion. FML
Today, I had to take an oral examination. I made it to the last part of the exam, then violently threw up in the middle of my answer. FML
Today, I farted A LOT during an exam, all silent, so I figured I should be OK. Then I looked around and everybody was suffocating and giving me sly looks. I'm now known to everyone in the department as SuperFart. FML
Today, I have to take medicine that gives me painful, violent farts. Tomorrow, I have to either get fired or go work in an office that's dead silent. How silent? Last week I heard my coworker drop a paperclip, three desks away. FML
Today, I’ve been having the worst gas, nausea, and stomach pain of my life and literally nothing I do works. While I was at work, I farted but it came from the inside out; it was so loud there’s no way everyone didn’t hear it. My stomach started bubbling so loud, the guy sitting behind me got up and walked away. FML
Today, I was given a powerful laxative to clear me out. I can't go to the bathroom because the four guests of my sleeping roommate are all sitting in dead silence against the paper-thin bathroom wall. FML
Today, I got my period. 10 minutes into a 3 hour exam. Apparently they are serious when they say you may not leave the room under any circumstances. FML
Today, I got the hiccups during an exam. I wasn't allowed to leave to get a drink of water, so I had to sit there and take my test while hiccuping violently. The teacher ended up sending me to the hall and ripping up my test for "distracting the other students". FML
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Top comments
Miss_Michaela 10
Go in there with your head high, and your middle finger higher saying 'If I have to suffer, so do all of you!'.
dlohoh978 8
what cartoons do u watch??? lol
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Comments (106)
perdix 31
What good luck for you! By passing noxious fumes regularly, everyone sitting near you will do badly on the test, thus lowering the mean for you. Well played!
TheDrifter 24
Ah, the fine art of manipulating the bell curve. I had thought it a lost art.
perdix 31
I'm old. The art may indeed be lost. Back in my day, when someone wanted to tweet you the answers on a test, they had to stand outside and whistle in Morse code.
gofuckyourselfha 0
to many fiber ones huh
spcmonkeyzzzz 1
did you pass?
MrXerxes5 6
44- i love the positive thinking! It's ingenious what you have taught me today!
jazmine23j 0
Awww man... When I take exams and it's real quiet,my stomach growls like crazy:-S
wisericky 12
soo, i get to test your new product, right? im serving time for manslaughter and no one will let me drop the soap. :'(
Consequences 0
Just appreciate that beautiful gift from God like a man would.
alipod 11
drink 2 cups of milk
papalael 0
Make sure the wind doesn't become a violent tonado. Lol
bullrider92 19
Take your dog with you so you can blame him like Paris does