Today, I woke up in a panic to what sounded like a plane about to crash into my house. I was so scared, I peed myself and passed out. It was just my cell phone vibrating under my pillow. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after being on vacation for a week, my alarm sounded early in the morning. It scared me so badly I peed myself. FML
Today, I woke up from a nap to a weird buzzing sound in my ear. Panicked, I swatted at my ear to get rid of what I thought was a fly. Instead, I hit my phone, which was on vibrate, and it fell on the tiled floor, spinning the screen into a cracked, shattered mess. FML
Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shat myself. FML
Today, I was lying in bed, staring at the ceiling with the lights off. It was 1AM and I'd just finished watching a scary movie so I was a little paranoid. I was about to fall asleep when an eerie light lit the room. I jumped, got tangled in the sheets, and hit my head against the bed frame. Where'd the light come from? Not a space ship. Not someone breaking in. It was my phone. FML
Today, I had a dream I was going the bathroom. I then woke up peeing, but I didn’t wet the bed yet. As I ran to the bathroom while half asleep and in the dark, I rammed into the wall. On my way back to bed, I tripped and accidentally slapped my fiancé in an effort to stop myself from falling over. FML
Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house, dying to pee during a thunderstorm. Ran to the bathroom, but it was occupied. A huge thunderclap scared me pretty bad. When the door finally opened, my girlfriend's mom walked out, laughing. I realized the thunder scared me into peeing my pants. FML
Today, while trying to find my phone in the depths of the sheets on my bed, I gave my comforter a huge shake. A second later, I heard a crash. My phone had miraculously flown straight into the glass of water on my nightstand. Found it. FML
Today, I was woken up by a loud noise, which I thought was an earthquake. It sounded like a car had driven right into my living room. Which was exactly what it was. FML
Today, I texted my crush that I can't come over and invited him over instead. I was so anxious for his reply I took my cell to the washroom with me. Just as I was pulling up my pants I heard something fall into the bowl, I turned around and watched my cell floating in the my own pee, vibrating. FML
Today, I had a dream in which I was having a panic attack. When I woke up, I was actually having a panic attack. Double the fun. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
zmoney314 0
wow your a dumbass
We_Li_Ve_Fr_Ee 0
That is one pissed off vibrate.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (100)
JokerJohn7 0
you're stupid. reallyyyy stupid.
michaelm1290 23
Oh cell phone huh? Is that what were calling vibrators these days?
kasumii 1
You shouldn't sleep with your phone under your pillow, it's bad for your health.
JustPerfect1997 19
This is true. Cellphones overheat when they are charging or in places where it cannot cool down. Cellphones have overheated too much and set fire to the bed linens around it before
technicallyhuman 0
did you also travel to a tangent universe, see a giant bunny rabbit named frank, and realize you have powers?. no? I thought you were donnie darko I must be confused.
Emmy_The_Great 2
...WHAT!!! Haha that's the exact thought that went through my mind as I read this.
DisrandomBMXican 0
Yu ar dum. Yu ar reely reely dum. Forreal.
Nooneslooking 0
you're an idiot, how does a phone sound like that? how do you even know what that sounds like? I leave my phone under my pillow all the time in case I fall asleep texting and not once has a plane about to crash into my house crossed my mind. YDI
nate_msm 0
11 if I had ops number I would just text saying "watch out for that aeroplane ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh I kid lol"
footballtracksta 0
are you retarded? it's a cell phone vibrator...how the hell would you pass out?
848901 0
Scrub