Today, I went to Walmart with my Dad, and he decided to kick me in the butt while I was walking. When I went to kick him back, I hit my own leg out from beneath myself and landed on my face. The most embarrassing thing was that the people who saw all started clapping. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was at work at Walmart, casually walking in the middle of the store, when my foot caught on something, so I went flying forward and yelled, being caught off guard, to the point I had to pretend I was running for 3 seconds, then someone blocked my path so I suddenly had to stop. Everyone was staring at me. FML
Today, I was at the mall with my mom. She was pissing me off, so I started screaming at her and causing a scene. I ended up falling all the way down the up escalator. Everyone saw and people clapped. FML
Today, while browsing through Walmart, I slipped on a piece of clothing and fell backwards into an obese lady’s butt. When I landed, she farted. FML
Today, a guy grabbed my ass at the mall. I whirled around and went to sock him. He ducked and I accidentally hit the elderly woman standing behind him in the face. To say all hell broke loose would be an understatement. FML
Today, I was at the supermarket when I saw an elderly lady slip on a wet patch of floor. I ran over to help, and I almost fell too before steadying myself. Then some pimply cockmunch of a teen decided to kick my legs out from under me and walk away while laughing his balls off. FML
Today, I was at Walmart walking around when I slipped on some water and twisted my ankle. As I was getting up, a man came up to me and said, "There's some water on the floor, watch out." FML
Today, I got kicked in the face at a soccer game. Everybody clapped. FML
Today, while shopping at Wal-Mart, a guy grabbed my butt. When I turned around to slap him, he shook his head, said "Nice ass but such an ugly face", then walked away. I've never been told I'm ugly before. FML
Today, I tripped over a ice block frozen to the ground and hit my knee hard on another. I had trouble getting up, so I asked my dad if he could give me a hand. He started clapping and walked away. FML
Today, I had to present a powerpoint in front of my class. When I was finished, no one clapped. On my way back to my seat, I slipped on a pencil and fell straight on my face. That's when everyone clapped. FML
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Top comments
Jimster1712 0
Thats what you get for messing with the guy who created you as a result of his ******.
no_clue_4_u 4
All the best stories start with "I went to Wal-Mart".
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Comments (107)
THE_A_TEEN 28
Op get a perfect 10 for that magnificent faceplant.
kareltje 17
You probably deserved the kick in your butt, and if you did, you TOTALLY deserved to go on your face for trying to kick back your dad. The kids of today have no clue anymore what respect is.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Not all kids dude, some are nice.
stoptrying 9
I have respect for your stupidity, #36. It takes a monumental amount of hits to the head to achieve that level of stupid.
kkatzlove 10
You just made my day XD
candicurl 9
Looks like everyone *puts on sunglasses* got a kick out of you. YEEEAAAAAAAH
Analtality 4
Your dad kicks ass. Literally.
Norrec86 7
How does that even happen
perdix 31
Clearly, the most embarrassing thing is that you think "I hit my own leg out from beneath myself" makes any sense at all. The Saskatchewan public school system is weeping.
xDMACx12 7
How does it not make sense? She clearly went to kick her father back and somehow kicked the other one out from beneath her. Unless you are saying that it doesn't make sense some other way.
perdix 31
There's nothing clear about this! Did she kick her support leg with her kicking leg? If that's what she meant, it's very poorly written.
Levvy 22
Duh. Clearly the best way to kick someone is to move your leg away from them and towards the other leg. It's in the official martial arts drills of the Dumfukistan military.
ikickgingers 15
The real question that needs clarity--was it the "slow clap"? I have always wanted to do that.
GarysMom725 10
Why would your dad kick you to begin with? I don't understand some parents these days. Who taught the parents to bully like that and then they continue it? No wonder there is such s bullying problem today!
THE_A_TEEN 28
On the parent bullying scale, it's not so bad compare to creating a myspace page with your daughter, pretending to be a guy the victim like's, and then tormenting her to kill herself.
applznoatz 1
I would think this was more of a kidding around thing the dad was doing and when the kid went to do the same thing back the epic fail occurred. My teens and I horse around, that doesn't make it child abuse or bullying. For example, if my daughter gives me a punch-buggy, I might lick her cheek while pretending to go in for a kiss. Yes, in public. And yes, I'm the mom. We're just weird and we have fun with it. Relax. Watch some 'toons and chill.
kkatzlove 10
It's not bullying it's called messing around. My dad does the same thing to me you don't kick them hard it's just a tap.
tsizzleisback 3
Shut your mouth
YayFlameWarz 9
You're probably on that internet show with all the Wal-Mart cameras catching people looking stupid. Can I get your autograph?
lifelessons22222 0
What the ****??
BighornB 0
Typical walmart rednecks
THE_A_TEEN 28
Typical wealthy ****.