Today, I went to the bookstore and saw a stunning girl reading. I walked over and picked up a book, thinking our two books were the same category, hence a good conversation starter. She looked at me, and I pointed at my book and smiled. After that, she left. It was a sex position book. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was in the middle of enjoying a really good book while in a waiting room. Someone saw what I was reading and thought it would be cool if she leaned over and told me everything that happens. FML
Today, I was in the romantic section of a book store making fun of the titles. Thinking my friend was behind me, I read in a sexy voice, “Sleeping with a Stranger” and turned to laugh only to find the 70-year-old store manager smiling and winking at me. FML
Today, I was at the store when I saw two extremely hot girls. I walked into their aisle and they looked at me and smiled. I stopped and pretended to look at something so I could listen to what they were saying. They started laughing and walked away. It turned out I was reading a box of tampons. FML
Today, I went to the library to bring back some books, I walked up to the counter and the librarian turned to me and said "What can I do for you young man?" I'm a girl. FML
Today, I was sexing it up with my boyfriend. Halfway through, he looked at me and said, "Y'know what you never see in a porno? Intellectual conversation. Read any good books lately?" He wouldn't keep going until I answered. FML
Today, I saw a cute guy at the coffee shop reading a book. Wanting to be friendly, I smiled as I approached and asked what he was reading. He returned the smile and said, "Minding your damn business, by Fuck Off." FML
Today, while I was shopping at a store with my friend, I noticed a cute girl smiling at us. My friend said, "She's all yours," and walked away. When I approached her, she asked me if my friend was single. FML
Today, I went to the store with my girlfriend. She needed to use the bathroom so I started looking at the books. It wasn't until the manager shot me a weird look that I realized I'd wandered down too far and was looking at bridal magazines, holding tampons, dog treats, and hair spray. FML
Today, my new boyfriend came over to my apartment for the first time. Up until now I thought he was great, but when he spotted the book I'm currently reading next to my couch, he uttered the immortal question, "Why do you read?" FML
Today, I went to the grocery store. I saw a very cute guy in the aisle and smiled. He smiled back and blushed a little. He walked over and I flirted with him. He said, "I thought you should know the zipper on your jeans is down" and walked away. It was. FML
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Top comments
lonkite101 14
I wonder what went through her mind when she sees a guy start walking up to her with a sex positions book...0.o
cholobear21 6
You deserve it for not looking at the cover. Rookie mistake.
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Comments (160)
jibz 6
What happened to just introducing yourself?
The_F3rris 11
Chivalry is dead. And so is simplicity.
Superstitious 6
Look around at the growing population of dumbfucks. Chivalry may be dwindling, but simplicity is at an all-time high
XxQueenofPuppets 10
Says the poster with the Che picture...
l23VIVE 17
Says the poster with a misspelled word in their profile pic
1030295 6
Awkward...
DasHaas 9
Because sincerity is overrated. One must trick the female into copulating by pretending to be the preferred mate. Or, you know, learn to be an actual person some day :)
The_F3rris 11
And once you put that ring on her finger you can just quit pretending and be who you truely are. The beauty of marriage.
zandalee 20
That is so funny! She must have thought you were a weird creepy guy. I bet she ran all the way home. Lol.
The_Thinker 18
Common interests are an automatic leap into a real in-depth conversation starter. He picked up a book which he believed was in the same category as hers, so it would seem that they both had a similar taste in reading, which the girl would've noticed and he would've went in on.
DocBastard 40
Smooth move, Casanova. Did you really think pointing at a sex positions book would be a conversation starter? You know what's REALLY a conversation starter? Talking.
starwind3438 9
What a novel concept Doc!!!
Trisha_aus 15
If only blokes listened to Doc instead of trying to act "cool" or "slick"
Forlorn420 9
Right? If she had been interested after that, op woulda had one hell of a night
jkozzy 8
At least it wasn't a coming out of the closet book.
destraa 1
That one has to go in the pick up line book of records.
perdix 31
Well, you can't judge a book by its cover. You CAN judge an idiot who can't judge that a book with naked people on the cover makes him look like a perv . . . or a virgin.
zandalee 20
Or a creeper.
l23VIVE 17
I hope OP doesn't blow up my house... It'd suck if i lost my diamonds