Today, I went to get my spray tan before my semi-formal. After I applied lotion to the bottom of my feet as instructed, I went in the booth and began to start the tanning session. I lost my balance and fell right as the machine began to spray. I look like a spotted cheetah. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got a spray tan for the first time. Naked, I climbed into the booth. When the machine started I became frightened by the loud roar of the spray and couldn't breathe. I pissed myself out of fear. I now have river-like streaks down both legs where the pee washed my tan away. FML
Today, I got a spray tan for homecoming. While I was dancing, I got really sweaty and the spray tan rubbed off on the guy's white tux. FML
Today, I went to a tanning salon. I guess nobody mentioned that you have to lift your fat rolls or you'll end up with weird stripes where the spray never reached. FML
Today, I decided to spray tan myself. Five minutes later, I had to pee, so I did. Not only do I now have two orange stripes on my toilet bowl, but I also have two big white stripes on the back of my thighs. FML
Today, I was getting ready for the school swimming carnival and was running very late. I reached for my deodorant and sprayed it on. It was only when I was at the pool that I realized I had accidentally grabbed the spray tan and covered my underarms in it. FML
Today, I used the tanning booth for the first time. Not only was I so white that I received first-degree burns all over my body, but I also forgot to remove my knee-high socks. FML
Today, I went to the tanning bed. I laid down in the bed and turned it on and the fan started blowing. There was a terrible smell and I thought it was the person before me. Then I realized it was just the fan blowing my sweaty feet towards my face. FML
Today, my sister thought it would be funny to spray my face with my new tanning spray, which is only supposed to be used on arms and legs. I woke up and looked in the mirror to see an orange blotchy face staring back at me. My parents can't look at me without laughing. FML
Today, I decided to try a self-tanning lotion my friend had recommended. I put it on, and decided to take a nap. I woke up later and checked myself in the mirror, expecting to see a new, more tanned version of myself. I didn't. I'm now orange. FML
Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML
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Top comments
trying_madly 0
i don't understand the obsession with being so tan, honestly what a waste of money.
efemivida 0
At least you're trying to prevent skin cancer by avoiding the tanning bed!
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Comments (66)
ummokayso 0
too bad spray tans are 25$ each and tanning for a whole month is 40. but kudos for trying to look good, i'm too afraid to spray tan. oh well. you can always cut skin cancer off :) (kidding)
Bibico_fml 0
Yeah, spray tans look soooooooo natural. Go to any bodybuilding show and check out the very realistic "tans".
King_of_Kings 3
i dont know why people especially girls must get tanned. i mean seriously ladies, why must you always be tanned? in my opinion, i like non tanned girls. natural is so sexy. who agrees with me on this?
somethingvague 0
Yeah, I'm wondering what #1 is.. lotion on your feet?
ohmygolly 0
It puts the lotion on its feet or else it gets the spray tan again.
PTERONOPHOBIA 0
My God, you guys, you can have a tan without looking disgusting. It's not like you set foot in a tanning salon and instantly turn orange. Also #16... um, I'd really like to know how someone can get cancer by being spray-tanned.
SatansBiggestFan 4
YOUR GOD ISN'T REAL
djdeathwish 0
Spray-tan? Come on go for the real tan, comes with sweet Cancer at no extra charge!
stoutn 2
my question is how the hell did she lose balance standing up lol
pinkalicious224 7
#78 Do you expect OP to loose balance while sitting down??
Link5794 18
Have you ever been pushed by a large dog while crouching? You will lose balance. I learned this less than two hours ago.
Bloink 25
78 she lost balance cuz the bottoms of her feet were slippery from the lotion
musicalmandi16 0
**** YOU ZING MASTER
holynemesis1208 3
it could be worse you could look like a stripped tiger.
Silas_fml 0
Today, I found out that my school is actually the headquarters for an underground Furry organisation. FML.