Today, I went to buy some beer using my fake ID, when the cute cashier and I started flirting. When he asked me how old I was, I said without thinking, "Nineteen." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to buy beer underage for a party to impress a girl. I picked up the case of beer and went to the cashier, he ran it through without asking for ID. I left the store with a smirk on my face, I arrived at the party and showed the case to the girl. It was non-alcoholic. FML
Today, I tried buying alcohol for the first time. I have a baby face, so I had my ID ready. The store owner admitted that my ID looked real enough, but he wouldn't believe it wasn't just an elaborate fake. He very nearly called the cops on me. FML
Today, I sold a customer some beer. He then asked to see the manager, and told me he was a 19 year-old undercover cop. My knee jerk reaction was to panic and curse aloud, before realizing he was balding, toothless, probably 50, certainly not a cop, and laughing at me for being such a gullible moron. FML
Today, when I went to the gas station to buy beer, some underage punk outside asked me to buy him booze. I told him to get bent, but the dumbass cashier had seen me talking to him, and refused to let me buy alcohol because, "This is obviously a sting." FML
Today, I got my fake ID and went out with the boys to dinner and the bars. One of my friends asked to see my ID. He noticed my birthday didn't make me over 21. I paid $170 for a fake ID with my real birthday. FML
Today, I bought a small bottle of liquor to share with my husband to celebrate our move. It took three hours at the store as the cashier, manager, GM, and a police officer checked my ID believing it was fake. I'm 25. FML
Today, while buying drinks, the cashier immediately refused me and said, “Don’t even bother showing me your ID, you’re obviously 12." I’m 31. FML
Today, I went to see a movie. While buying tickets, the girl behind the counter asked to show my ID card to proof I'm at least 16 years old. Not wanting to make a drama, I showed it. She took a look at it and declared it as fake. That ID is real and I'm 24. FML
Today, I went to a bar to celebrate my 26th birthday. I got ripped off by the bartender all night because she secretly gave me non-alcoholic versions of my drinks. Apparently I look like I'm 16, so she thought my ID was fake. Happy birthday to me. FML
Today, I tried to buy a bottle of wine from the supermarket. The scrawny, acne-ridden kid at the checkout asked to see my ID. I didn't have any on me, since I'm 37 years old and didn't expect to be asked stupid questions. I complained to his manager, only to be asked to leave. FML
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Top comments
stuner56 22
If you are that dumb, you don't need beer
BigMatt803 18
I guess next time you'll try using it on an ugly cashier. YDI
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Comments (249)
BigMatt803 18
I guess next time you'll try using it on an ugly cashier. YDI
alwayscheesin 2
Or she can just play it cool?
BigMatt803 18
if she could play it cool, she would have gotten beer today lol
alwayscheesin 2
Now she knows for next time i guess
Miswildside 0
Or you never know. Could have been cashiers way of finding out if she was legal or not. My friend works at a local pub in my city, and he does the same. Hes caught several using a fake ID.
Miswildside 0
:)
Drigr 9
Or or or... Bear with me here... Maybe next time... Wait for it.... They WONT go and try to buy beer ilegally! What a strange concept!
shireman97 6
#38 Then your life would be worthless....duh
bfsd42 20
Did you know that the USA is the only country in the world that op cannot get served alcohol?
Streeet_hayley 6
#AmericanProblems
benimin 6
Come to Canada. It's 18 for us.
biggestfan23 11
#107. That's not true. If you meant to say first world country then you would be correct
Codezlol 21
130- 19 in some Provinces though
k2_silly 2
YDI for wanting to drink beer
zombiejombie 0
In Jamaica you have to be 16 or older.
stavrosg 3
In Greece it's legal from 17. Allthough you can't drive before you're 18, but you can get married and have concentual sex from 15 y.o. Weird, arbitrary age requirements ftw.
mightymart 5
Lol @ the us and their 21 law, it's 18 here in Canada..
RocketNinjaFish 12
the legal age is only 18 in Australia :)
nafedjs 2
Um..... Not quite. It's illegal in countries like Afghanistan and Libya.
owlfeatures 8
It's 16 to buy beer where I live ;)
stuner56 22
If you are that dumb, you don't need beer
NOOBSQUAD 0
Yeah but it's the people who are this stupid buying the beer, instead of being the person having someone else buying the beer.
WaSiSimiLang 8
Psshhh Wth you're talking about homer Simpson! Mmmmmh beer... Harggggggg... Ah beautiful wonderful beer, cause and answer to all life's problems... Feeling the sudden urge to watch homer vs prohibition again...
Beeftinkle 13
Time to start doing crack..can't get too much dumber than this.
JocelynKaulitz 28
They say that only drunk people and little kids tell the truth…were u drunk when you bought the beer or are you still acting like a little kid using a fake I.D.?
KingOfAmazing 9
I feel like OP is one of those people that should stay away from alcohol in general.
Byahhh 3
I would have had a save for this: "how old are you?" "nineteennn ninety one is when I was born."
Purplefluff 6
Everybody applaud for op
chocolatepandas 2
Nineteen is the new twenty-one.
thesubconscious 9
I'm Canada 18 is the new 21!
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Nice to meet you, Canada.
cashflow94 0
quack
SqueakyChipmunk 22
70's pic is the only acceptable duck face. EVER.
Twilix01 4
Duckface is only acceptable when it is on a duck. As for the FML, I say YDI for trying to use a fake ID.
AbbyAbyss 5
70- Great. You said "I'm Canada" and now I wanna watch Hetalia. Okay, that's total thread jacking, so let's add something about the FML. Why not just get someone else to buy it for you?
nafedjs 2
Then what's the point of having a fake at all?
Kristolinis 3
Aren't you allowed to buy alcohol after 18 years of age?
BigMatt803 18
not in the U.S., you have to be 21
DontClickOnMe 28
I don't know.. I think it's a good thing that the legal drinking age in the U.S. is 21 because people have to drink responsibly and I honestly think that 18 year olds are too young and immature to drink responsibly. Drinking affects your judgment first, which is basically what causes people to drink and drive, which is never a good idea.
DarthCory 7
Hell, quite a few 20+ year olds I know are too immature to handle it.
shireman97 6
#32 if you had time to type out what you did in parenthesis then I think you had time to just go back and correct you mistake..
ohmandapants 17
Agreed, 47. Sorry but 18-21 really isn't that big of an age difference. You don't magically mature in those 3 years, it's not as if you're gaining tons of life experience and wisdom. It depends on the type of person that you are, not necessarily your age.
gracehi 33
I agree that 18 year olds are irresponsible drinkers, but I also think that making it illegal for them to drink at that age makes them even more irresponsible, because they do stupid things to not get caught drinking, such as trying to drive home instead of calling their parents for a ride or taking their school's shuttle (just examples). Not only that, but making it illegal makes it cool to drink because you're a rebel or some dumb kid logic like that. On the other hand, if you're 21 and you constantly drink and party, you're a loser. Also, it never stops them from getting alcohol anyway.
Mahendra1 9
Yeah, a drinking age of 21 really helps lessen the risk of drink driving. That's why the US has a drink driving rate four times higher than that of the UK and Ontario, which have drinking ages of 18 and 19 respectively. That "no alcohol until you're 21" is certainly working for you guys in that respect...
RobManB 4
Ya... But who the **** wants to live in the UK or Ontario?
ohmandapants 17
...clearly you've never been to either place. You're pretty ignorant.
pmr1990 12
The logic for lowering the drinking age from 21 to 18 in Australia was pretty simple. At the time, conscription was occurring for the Vietnam war. So you were old enough to be forced to fight and die for your country, but you couldn't buy alcohol. For a country like the US, which is so obsessed with 'freedom and liberty' that you allow ridiculous gun laws for the sake of you 'rights', but don't allow an 18 year old adult to purchase alcohol, you seriously need to look at your priorities. RIP to the victims of the latest senseless deaths.
WaSiSimiLang 8
I wouldn't mind living in the countrysides of uk, visit Stratford oxford etc on my off days from growing my desired plantation on my piece of property so GTFO thanks
LavenderLunacy14 7
But their judgment is good enough to vote and decide to serve in the military. It seems kind of like a double standard. Sorry.
MassiveBerry 9
In Russia they drink alcohol from a young age so their bodies get used to it.
ArcadePie 10
Call me crazy but i think the lower the drinking age the better in belgium the drinking age is 16 and kids learn how to drink responsibly from their parents and it seemsto be working pretty well over there
gracehi 33
#75, Our gun laws are not "ridiculous," as you say, but protect us from criminals who disregard gun laws and the possibility of a tyrannical genocidal government, like the one that took power in Germany after Adolf Hitler banned guns and then proceeded to slaughter thousands of his own defenseless unarmed citizens. Similarly, if your government turned on you, you'd be screwed. And I'll thank you for not politicizing a recent tragedy that would have happened regardless of gun laws, given the impressive amount of explosives found in James Homes's booby trapped apartment. I'll also thank you for not bringing gun laws into an unrelated discussion.
gracehi 33
James *Holmes
brill33 7
#47 screw you
mrsVeck 0
Sucks for you because in Canada age 19 is legal. Either way, FYL.
doctorhook86 25
5: I'm in Alberta, where 18 is legal.
botdflove 4
So lucky
42istheanswer 27
18 in Manitoba :p
juunebug 2
In Canada, 18 is legal in Alberta and Quebec.
jameslocklar 2
In mexico they don't care how old you are!
gabrielle01 0
I'm so moving to Mexico :)
brisbanegirl 21
In Australia 18 is the legal age! Yay! :D
minus20 4
**** Canada. USA! USA! USA!
nevershoutkendal_fml 11
In Ireland, you drink when you come out of the womb.
doctorhook86 25
You've got some beautiful Irish features in your profile pic, 143.
ichoosetobe 10
Yeah I had to think about it for a sec b/c I'm used to 18 in Canada...
sex_and_drugs 11
in Alberta itz 18
TriflingAllDay 6
This is true.
CyborgBanana 12
143 - In Ireland, we don't pretend we were born in another country just to post a comment to get thumb-ups.
JoeRogansBEARD 15
In soviet Russia, beer drinks you!!!
ogle5431 1
Sucks for you because you have to live in Canada.
ops1994 4
No you dont I live in Washington and I have driven up to Canada an bought beer no problem
evadeschipper 6
In Holland, 16 is the legal age for beer.
onlychildFTW 34
Well 18 or 19. Depending where you are from. Provincial law dictates that. Canada is amazing by the way.
DJ_G11_SMITH 8
It's 18 in Alberta, Manitoba, and Quebec
biglittlehead 12
All these years I thought I had to wait until I was 21.
nado13579 12
In Ontario it's 19. :P
tweetbaby14 18
176, she didn't say or imply she was Irish. It's called making a joke about another culture; people do things like that, shocking right?
doctorhook86 25
195: Richer and freer than the USA, with better education, public healthcare, stronger beer, and we're not hated around the world; yeah, I think I'll stick with Canada.
1awliet 8
Where I come from, they don't care how old you are, they just want your money.
MURIKKA 11
*awkward science*....
TheSmoothDude 10
Was spelling awkward for you too?
SuaSponte 1
I never thought science was awkward.
MURIKKA 11
I meant to say "silence". I need to proofread more.
TheSmoothDude 10
25 - It's okay autocorrect is the devil.
_Oblivion_ 12
Never even noticed until you guys said it was wrong haha
FranzFerdinand 18
I don't even care that it was a typo, nor do I care that it was irrelevant; awkward science is one of the best concepts I've ever heard of in my life.
outoftown 27
#25, MURIKKA, Your error was funnier than the FML. Thanks!
Awkward_Science 2
7 - Your legacy shall live on in the form of a commenter
KiddNYC1O 22
Is that a sequel to Weird Science?
PhishloverA 14
I agree #26. Today I was texting my girlfriend and I meant to say the pot roast was still cooking and my autocorrect changed it to Poptarts
PhishloverA 14
#7, science is only awkward when you're being taught about sex
lolfood 24
I prefer drunk science.
dankpotatoes 2
Tell her that you're really a pedophile and you were just trying to get into her pants.
hotPinklipstick 24
I'm sure he wasn't really flirting, instead he was using reverse psychology. Better luck next time.
yoyoforpeace 14
Yeah but who knows he might of still sold it to her if he did like her.
kofeinisti 6
#10, this FML is not an example of reverse psychology. The cashier asked the OP a direct question regarding her age, there's nothing reverse about that.
every1luvsboners 11
I would suggest giving him a rim-job followed by a hand-job to prove you're old enough to buy the booze. He knows there's no way a 19 year old knows the proper procedure for a rim-job. Cops around here don't ask for ID - they ask for hand-jobs and rim-jobs.
Shrike 24
God bless you Boners, you're truly a credit to the human race.
every1luvsboners 11
Shrike, your comments are the best. I do fap to them from time to time.
DarthCory 7
A handjob and a rimjob at the same time is called a rusty trombone. The more you know.
ohcheriecherie 20
Thanks dusty! Ya learn something new every day
xXHollowIchigoXx 17
What the ****...?
dankpotatoes 2
*cue the random 12 year old asking what a rim job is*
PhishloverA 14
One time my mom and I got pulled over and the cop came to my mom's window and asked her for a hand job and a rim job instead of asking for her license and registration. Just kidding
BuffaloSabres134 8
Fake IDs never work and it's a felony offense to carry one, all in all it's a bad idea. Some clerks would keep the ID to show it to police
babbott13 3
Actually it's illegal for them to keep your fake. They can turn you down and call the cops. But they can't keep the id
bingo01_fml 13
It is not illegal for them to keep the fake. ID's are issued by and belong to the state and must be surrendered upon request. Since it was being used illegally the clerk has the right to keep it and turn it over to authorities.
jojimugo 20
The statement never work is incorrect. If they never worked people would never try to use them.
noonenoeone 22
Ha, I stayed a week in Vegas on a fake ID no problem. I actually used that ID for over 2 years and only had it taken once. My boy new the bouncer that took it so I got it back and continued using it. Fake IDs DO work!