Today, I went to a frozen yogurt stand with my dad. One of the flavors was called "Juicy Cherry." I had to stand there and watch in horror as he told the woman running the stand all about how he'd like to taste her juicy cherry. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to a cute frog-themed frozen yogurt shop that was surprisingly realistic. So realistic, in fact, that there was a dead fly in my yogurt. I found it with my tongue. FML
Today, I was in my local supermarket's frozen aisle and I started doing a little dance of joy because my favorite ice cream was on sale. I turned around to see my ex and his new girlfriend watching me. FML
Today, at work, I gave ice cream to a kid and apple pie to his dad. The kid decided to grab a literal handful of the dad’s pie which was steaming hot. Cue the kid screaming and the dad yelling at me for not telling his kid that the dessert, that WASN'T HIS, was hot and he shouldn’t touch it. FML
Today, my Dad and I went to McDonald's, only to have him shove two handfuls of sugar packets into the bag. He said, "If it's for free, why only take one?" To make it worse, my crush was at the till, watching what was happening. FML
Today, I took my daughter to the grocery store. The bag boy seemed to be flirting with me and smiling. He had to be half my age. Once in the car I glimpsed myself in the rear view mirror. I had chocolate completely covering one of my front teeth. FML
Today, I was at the mall with some friends. In the food court we passed by this creepy pervert feeling up a woman. I take a closer look and realize with horror that the guy is my dad in sunglasses and a hat. The lady he was with was not my mom. FML
Today, I went to have dessert with my boyfriend. We ordered some Jello. I said that I loved Jello because it is so fun and jiggly. My boyfriend said, "Like you. Except the fun part". FML
Today, I was at the mall, I saw a girl crying that her ice cream had fallen on the floor. Feeling generous, I bought her a new one. She threw it on the ground, laughed, and came over to her mom and told that I was bothering her, so the mom called security. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I went out for ice cream. We somehow started talking about which of our relatives had died. Right when she was talking about how her grandfather had died, I started laughing. She had gotten ice cream all over her face. She broke up with me. FML
Today, a customer yelled at me because the cherry pie he bought had cherries in it, and he wanted a refund. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
qdawg06 23
Clever x10 but also creepy x100
Killz268 18
what a thug haha
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (74)
DrowningLessons 19
WTF!!! lol but i must admit that reminds me of my dad. FML!
Saraishi 25
Omg, I'm super sorry for you OP but that's just too funny. Also, if the frozen yogurt shop didn't want people asking about her 'juicy cherry' she shouldn't have named the flavour Juicy Cherry.
Spark_Slicker 19
Who says she named the flavors? And even if she did, why does naming it that automatically mean she deserves to have inappropriate sexual comments made towards her?
artistswife 19
I'm sure not the first time she's heard that. Kinda have to expect it naming the ice cream Juicy Cherry.
Krwman 8
I'll say it again: there's no fool like an old fool.
Jowisee 29
Thanks Sean Connery
canadiangirl98 9
He seems like a pervert
Tannasgh 22
Perv
zip1233333333434 11
Lol wonder if it was on purpose
catdog414 11
That sounds like an...interesting flavor
ILikeKoalas 24
Your dad sounds like a creepy old letch
Muttley9 13
My main issue is if he did it in a rude, flirty or extremely suggestive fashion. Otherwise, what choice, given the name of the flavor, did he have? Of course, I may just be old perv too :)