Today, I went skinny dipping with my friends. A security man drove up the dock we were on with his bike. After informing us that the dock was closed, and noticing all of our swimsuits on the dock, he refused to move his flashlight beam from us in the water. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went out on my back patio at night to skinny dip. I live on the intracoastal, and as I was walking towards my pool, the police were doing a random search. From a boat with a spotlight. At least their whistles told me they liked the birthday suit I had on. FML
Today, I went skinny-dipping with my friends. At one point, I jokingly pointed out how one of them had the smallest boobs of us all. She calmly got out of the pond, dried herself, scooped up our clothes and phones, and drove off in her car. The cops she called arrived soon after. FML
Today, I went skinny-dipping with my best friend. We were on the beach and it was fairly crowded but we got in the water at this really secluded area. While we were swimming I looked up to see a homeless man wearing my clothes, walking away. FML
Today, I went skinny dipping with a few friends at my friend's house. It was really fun until one of my friends shrieked, saying there were bugs in the pool. Everyone jumped out and looked at her. Turns out the "bugs" she saw was my body hair. FML
Today, a few of my friends arranged for us to go skinny-dipping with the guy I really like. It went really well, until a turd surfaced before our eyes. After we scrambled out of the pool in panic, my crush called us all freaks and left. FML
Today, a bunch of friends and I went skinny dipping in a pond. The guys all grabbed the ladies' underpants and waved then around. My bloody pad was inside of one of them. FML
Today, I was at a friend's pool party. He lives on a lake and one of our friends wouldn't get in the water. My best friend and I decided to push him off the dock. Once we had, I turned to see my crush who had watched looked shocked, then said, "You know he can't swim right?" FML
Today, I went swimming at a public pool. When I dove in, my speedos decided they’d had enough of me and slipped right off. I spent a minute underwater debating my life choices before realizing they’d floated to the shallow end, right next to a group of giggling kids. FML
Today, my friend thought it would be funny to post a sign at the deep end of the public swimming pool, saying, "This end topless only." When someone complained, he said that I did it, and I got banned from the pool for life. And fired, too - I was the lifeguard. FML
Today, my friend and I decided to go skinny-dipping in her pool just after we'd finished watching a scary movie. While we were in the pool, I heard something move in the bushes so I freaked out and ran onto the deck, slipping and falling flat on my back. Her dad saw the whole thing. FML
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Top comments
Doortje 30
What a perv.
thesunsetglow_fml 8
Well he was obviously waiting for you to ask him to join. How insensitive of you not to.
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Comments (224)
Doortje 30
What a perv.
i_love_grrr 0
he was wanting a free show! lol
fashionistaGirll 0
Hopefully they were over 18 then that is reallyy perverted...
muhaidib 2
depends if the OP is a man, woman, little boy/girl... could be worst
IceeCreamm 7
yeah that maybe perving, but isn't everyone skinny dipping looking at eachother naked anyway?
Bobissmall 13
It is perving if you're naked in public? I thought that was simply illegal.
Keyman1212 14
Yeah... The whole institution of skinny dipping is based in perviness. Comes with the territory.
seanders 10
I would have done the same thing. (Assuming they're old enough). Woulda taught your skanky ass a lesson, plus a free show is hard to pass up.
atthegates 0
a bunch of dudes skinny dipping. no ****.
justanothagirl 0
could've been worse...... your dad could be the cop
Soloman212 28
Seeing as the OP's username is "Men '86"...
letsgoflyakite 2
he just wanted to make sure they got out okay...
dolphincheddar 10
43 it's because he went skinny dipping with 86 men
nite66 21
op is a dude
theaws0m3guy 4
Heh. Heh. Ohh right! Giggity...
Ch0sen 13
Could've been a horrendously ugly female guard who's just never had any luck with boys..I mean men* Personally I think that's worse, but maybe that's just me >_>
NastyNinja31 0
this mus b where the homeless guy was trying to get
Ch0sen 13
I just realized that op referred to the guard as a "he". But could just be an extremely manly woman...extremely manly and ugly woman...
bengalsbaby13 0
creep much? haha
SuperPineApple 0
Well did you give him a good show? He might have paid
bubble25_fml 5
when u go skinny dipping with your friends it doesn't matter that yo are naked because of the trust within the friendship. it's not the same as when a total stranger finds you and a couple of friends butt naked in the water.
scrapmetal58 9
At least he wasn't pointing his fleshlight at you.
ILUVMSC 5
that's just a disturbing thought.. trying to make it awkward? well done.
2ndSucks 15
So if op is a guy, and the cop was a man... Is there a video of this somewhere?
dolphincheddar 10
probably
Iamnotmyself 17
Men '86... Good porno name.
kateheartswaffle 0
how is it skanky? they were just having fun
seanders 10
176: Is that what you'll say when you get pregnant before you turn 17?
chiddy_bang71 0
please pardon the Pervy po-po
dolphincheddar 10
177. most likely
a_nutritionist 10
@114 when you go there after its closed youre aware of the high risk of being caught. if you then get caught, you then lose the right to bitch about it because you were doing the wrong thing in the first place.
sskarma23 9
you did report him right?
cdninf 4
I don't blame him, some vancouverites are nice.
iceymouse17 4
damn perverts
sweetluv006 6
#14: 69 likes on your comment.......
Mesocoollike 8
that sucks...
JangiJangiJangi 0
ydi because you went skinny dipping in a public place. but that mans a perv. ew.
UN1T3D 6
tell the girls to turn on their high beams and distract him while you make a quick get away.
Ch0sen 13
Where were you? I want to go skinny dipping there now. So the security man can shine his light on me too
HeartAndSoul2011 0
at #2: I like your picture ;)
trgower13 0
it's his job. don't blame him. you deserved it.
tellithowitis 13
did you ask him to join you?
Kirashai 9
Time to learn to be an exhibitionist? :),
hockeychick52125 0
lmfao. !!! sucks for u !!
rayrayray23 1
sucks for your mother.
thesunsetglow_fml 8
Well he was obviously waiting for you to ask him to join. How insensitive of you not to.
likerawrandstuff 0
XD No, They Dont Wait To Be Asked He Jumps In ;) Lol
zinoxity 23
I would join, I live where OP lives.
katgoesmeow 0
I used to until I moved to Alberta on last Wednesday
thesunsetglow_fml 8
way to join the AB crowd ;)
lalagurl11 6
pervs are disgusting
MaloPero 4
no, perv is a person who enjoys in their humiliation. they weren' t waiving penises in front of children faces, they were just having fun, naked or not.
IvanElFregon 0
she's probably the black girl in the pic
Krennicus 0
Oh my God! Naked humans! The world is going to end and society will collapse. Please, they aren't criminals, they are just humans in natural form.
TaylorTotsYumm 10
I am not disgusting!
IAm1AwesomeChick 7
105, they may have broken the law but it doesn't mean that they are pervs.
juan01 0
your ugly
Xx_Dakota_xX 1
umm splash him in the face with water and when he's blinded you take his flashlight and throw him in the water and make your get away
moosemonkey1000 6
so instead of just covering up for a minute or so, face assault and battery charges. Makes sense.
Xx_Dakota_xX 1
well if he's creeping on u by looking at u naked u aren't going to let him see u naked and try to cover up
leetee1996 0
ur so stupid. he's a cop. I would just get out and get dressed. he's probably seen a naked person before. who cares.
ILUVMSC 5
but what if he was just posing as a cop?
Juggalette_623 9
I'd go with the whole splash him and run thing. Once they get out of the water naked, they could be arrested for indecent exposure. And yes, a cop on a bike can arrest people.
JokerJohn7 0
oh, obviously a good plan, because a little water is gonna blind him
Xx_Dakota_xX 1
or well I guess u might be able to sue for pretty much sexual harassment and I do agree with assaulting a cop
a_nutritionist 10
yes 184 just keep digging that hole.
itssnotfunny 24
why would they sue when they're the ones breaking the law?
mckinneymacy 2
what a creep!
Death_From_Above 0
have to agree with ya!
milkyway1101 0
lol yea
Laterial 3
That awkward moment when you're caught skinny dipping by the creepy, perv security guard...
JPSimsta 2
You don't go skinny dipping in a public place without some risk of being caught. heck if I saw a bunch of girls swimming naked id go for a peek myself!
loveluver7 0
exactally…
Iwashere12345 0
exactly not exactally *franker nazi strikes again! muahahaha!*
Iwashere12345 0
*grammar not franker. not really sure how that happened
maybeeiwill 11
Is punctuation not part of grammar? Capitalize a few letters next time!!
helloadria 0
Capitalization is a part of grammar, however punctuation is separate, although I do understand where you were coming from. Proper english language seems to have been lost on society.
ogplusog 4
Goram franker nazis
goshpeople 4
My impression is that they were a group of men, hence the OP's name. #93, Firefly fan?
hiitisbrooke 28
But the OP was a guy....
Krennicus 0
Heil Grammatik!
leetee1996 0
yeah. me too. if I heard that there were people skinny dipping I would go and joint then and maybe have sex with them :)
ogplusog 4
#110 it's the stuff alright :)
goshpeople 4
Awesome. :)
lulututu 4
53 fail
toughchick14 15
But he wasn't peeking he was staring 15!