Today, I went on a date with a cute guy I met at a bookstore. He stood up and said he was leaving when I said that I didn't like 50 Shades of Grey, because he, "doesn't want to be near a bitch who doesn't know her place". He then told me to give him a ride home. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went on a date to the movies with this guy I kinda like. When he was driving me home, he asked me to be his girlfriend; I said I couldn’t because it was really bad timing. He kicked me out of the car, called me an asshole, and made me walk home. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy who seemed to be quite the gentleman. I was proven wrong when he told me to "shut it" during dinner, stiffed me on the bill, and then left me at the restaurant so he could get his own taxi home. FML
Today, I’m stuck on a date with a man who got ready by washing his car instead of showering, is proud to never read newspapers because “they lie”, and thinks racist jokes count as witty conversation. I’d have left already but he drove me, there’s no bus stop nearby, and no Ubers in the area. FML
Today, I went on a date. We met in the parking lot of a restaurant. As I approached his car he took one look at me, said "Nope", and drove off. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy that I really like. At the last minute he informed me a friend would be tagging along. To keep his friend from being a third-wheel, I kept up a conversation, and managed to piss my date off. He thought I would be a better match for his friend. FML
Today, I went on a date with this really cute guy from a dating app. He'd set the date and told me where to meet him. We met at a coffee shop, and he was an absolute gentleman. Five minutes after the date, I went to message him that I'd enjoyed myself, only to find he'd blocked me on the app. FML
Today, I tried to step out of my comfort zone and go out with a guy who’s not my usual type. He spent the whole date griping and complaining about how women never go for “nice guys” like him. When I pointed out we were currently on a date, he said, “I mean hot girls.” FML
Today, I went on a Tinder date with a guy who said, "Good girl" whenever I said anything that he agreed with. FML
Today, I went on a Grindr date with a really cute guy. I thought things went really well. When he dropped me off at home, he told me not to text him anymore because his wife might get mad. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy I've had a crush on for ages. Midway through the meal, he sighed and said, "I'll be honest, this is a horrible date. You got zero personality and I'm too lazy to do a window escape, so..." He then got up and walked out. FML
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Top comments
Cortezthe1st 23
Drive him further away from his house and kick him out.
devildog562 33
If I were you I would have left my date there and been done. At least you didn't put forth years of energy and sacrifice before you discovered he's a P.O.S.
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Comments (110)
Cortezthe1st 23
Drive him further away from his house and kick him out.
Sansa_fml 38
Great idea! Show him who's the boss.
doctorhook86 25
#10: Yeah! And gag him with a silk tie.
krazayman 18
bro #38 you just went 0 to 100 reeal quick
JazzHandsFML 28
gag 113 and put him in the trunk next to him
man_eating_bunny 18
Hope you said "Sorry bitches who don't know their own place don't give assholes a ride home"
devildog562 33
If I were you I would have left my date there and been done. At least you didn't put forth years of energy and sacrifice before you discovered he's a P.O.S.
MidnaLink 35
Hear hear!
musoboy 22
Indeed it's good he showed himself so early.
petrine 17
Agreed! Seems like she dodged a bullet there..
thisisbutaname 38
And obviously refuse to drive him. You're a "bitch who doesn't know her place", after all
1dvos_grl3 21
**** him and his ride sweetie, you deserve better.
Killswitchknot 20
Any woman who is told to "know her place" deserves better. I hope she did what #1 said.
mtrrace 4
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Man knows what he wants
devildog562 33
To be an chauvinist asshole ?
domolovesyoshi 33
That's not even what BDSM is about, the slave has all the power, it's empowering not an excuse to be a chauvinist pig
devildog562 33
#27 Please do not degrade pigs by comparing them to garbage . I rather respect and love bacon.
mtrrace 4
I didn't say what he wants is good ?
photographer49 22
#42 But you are justifying his actions, and there is never any justification for being an asshole.
JMichael 26
Did you kick the shit out of him?
MzZombicidal 36
If he was my date, he would have been 50 Shades of ****** Up.
vreid 20
I really hope you didn't give him a ride!
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Should've let him find his own way home.
Bulldozer36 21
What the actual ****? Douchey McDouche needs to learn his place.
Corey122726 17
Did you tell him you'd give him a ride on the new Footup Yourass Express? Conveniently located on your right shoe.
Onyx3288 22
Dafuk
firefox9778 20
"Dafuk" is wrong with your English.