Today, I went on a date with a cute guy I met at a bookstore. He stood up and said he was leaving when I said that I didn't like 50 Shades of Grey, because he, "doesn't want to be near a bitch who doesn't know her place". He then told me to give him a ride home. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went on a date to the movies with this guy I kinda like. When he was driving me home, he asked me to be his girlfriend; I said I couldn’t because it was really bad timing. He kicked me out of the car, called me an asshole, and made me walk home. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy who seemed to be quite the gentleman. I was proven wrong when he told me to "shut it" during dinner, stiffed me on the bill, and then left me at the restaurant so he could get his own taxi home. FML
Today, I’m stuck on a date with a man who got ready by washing his car instead of showering, is proud to never read newspapers because “they lie”, and thinks racist jokes count as witty conversation. I’d have left already but he drove me, there’s no bus stop nearby, and no Ubers in the area. FML
Today, I went on a date. We met in the parking lot of a restaurant. As I approached his car he took one look at me, said "Nope", and drove off. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy that I really like. At the last minute he informed me a friend would be tagging along. To keep his friend from being a third-wheel, I kept up a conversation, and managed to piss my date off. He thought I would be a better match for his friend. FML
Today, I went on a date with this really cute guy from a dating app. He'd set the date and told me where to meet him. We met at a coffee shop, and he was an absolute gentleman. Five minutes after the date, I went to message him that I'd enjoyed myself, only to find he'd blocked me on the app. FML
Today, I tried to step out of my comfort zone and go out with a guy who’s not my usual type. He spent the whole date griping and complaining about how women never go for “nice guys” like him. When I pointed out we were currently on a date, he said, “I mean hot girls.” FML
Today, I went on a Tinder date with a guy who said, "Good girl" whenever I said anything that he agreed with. FML
Today, I went on a Grindr date with a really cute guy. I thought things went really well. When he dropped me off at home, he told me not to text him anymore because his wife might get mad. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy I've had a crush on for ages. Midway through the meal, he sighed and said, "I'll be honest, this is a horrible date. You got zero personality and I'm too lazy to do a window escape, so..." He then got up and walked out. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Cortezthe1st 23
Drive him further away from his house and kick him out.
devildog562 33
If I were you I would have left my date there and been done. At least you didn't put forth years of energy and sacrifice before you discovered he's a P.O.S.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (110)
Andrewski12 18
rude
ShatteredPulse 15
I thought that whole book was just an atrocious joke but apparently there are people who take the book seriously, what an asshat..
_Peppermint_ 34
From the way this FML is written, I'm glad you turned that asshole down.
dustin007 15
Please tell me you didn't give him a ride.. This needs a follow up
amber3120 15
Did you leave him there ? I would of .
clarebear_xo 5
Sounds to me like you dodged a bullet. Why waste your time with someone as ignorant as him?
Meowfml 8
Hope you made him walk. He doesn't deserve you.
PrincessZelda_HR 22
Please tell me you told him it 'wasn't your place' to drive assholes around
BasketCase092 19
I sure hope you told him to **** off and left him there.
Xx_ISeeStara_xD 15
-sighs deeply- for one, if he's trying to be a dom/master, you never call your sub/slave a "bitch who doesn't know her place" UNLESS talked over before hand, IF that's the kind of relationship you're even in. Secondly, I've never even bothered with the book. Once I heard it was from a vanilla point of view, that was it for me. Because I figured the book would have it's flaws. This jerk needs to realize that he can't just talk to people that way, and that there are people who WILL have different tastes than him. I hate people like this guy. I'm glad it didn't work out OP, it's too bad he didn't end up being a decent guy. Next guy you meet, maybe your introduction sentence should be "Why hello there, you're cute, NoIDon'tLike50ShadesOfGrey" (it sounded better in my head)