Today, I went bowling with my parents. This cute guy works there and he always flirts with me. My mom just so happened to see it today. As we left, she says to him, "You know she's 13, right?" I'm 17. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I went bowling with my mom and she paid for 2 games. By the 6th frame of game 1 she was bored and to get her money back for both games she told the employees I shit my pants. I'm 17. FML
Close shave
Today, I had dinner at a local fast-food joint. There's an employee there that I usually talk to and flirt with, so I thought maybe it was time to ask for her number. After a small conversation and almost getting to the point, she told me, "I'm 17." I'm 23. FML
Cougar
Today, a cute new guy I always run into at work hit on me. Turns out he's only 18. I'm old enough to be his mom. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided to take me out bowling. My mom was going to take us. My parents ended up bowling with us. I had a double date with my parents. FML
DAD! FATHER! WHAT THE FRICK?
Today, I went bowling with my family. When my brother went up to buy a drink refill, the guy at the counter kindly refilled it for free and told him that he thought I was pretty. My dad laughed and shouted, "Pretty ugly!" FML
Not a wife guy
Today, I went to a restaurant with my mother, where the waiter complimented my "wife". I'm not 18, and she's over 40. FML
Chris Hansen time
Today, I met and asked a cute girl out on a date. We decided to meet at a fancy restaurant downtown. When I got there I saw her sitting with what turned out to be her parents. They made a huge scene, calling me a pedophile and a low-life. Apparently, the girl was 16 years-old. I'm 25. FML
You tried
Today, while shopping, I saw a little girl and her mom. The girl was pouting so I tried to cheer her up by asking her if she was a princess, because she was so pretty. She smiled but her mom looked at me with disgust and told me to, "Get lost, pedo." I'm a 17-year-old girl. FML
Today, I went on a first date with a guy I really like. He brought up that there was a person staring at us from a nearby table. That person was my mom. FML
Grown up
Today, I went out to dinner with my boyfriend and his mom. The hostess asked if I needed "the kid's menu," remarked how I look "so grown up for your age," and asked what grade I was in. I said I'm in university. She laughed as if it was the best joke ever told. I'm 22. FML
Top comments
BADDiam 4
Parents sometimes shit on our moods.
Bonghittinglover 3
protective moms.. Better than having a mom that doesn't give a shit about you.
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Comments (188)
BADDiam 4
Parents sometimes shit on our moods.
SuperPineApple 0
Boom! Headshot!
CattyPurry 0
when your mom tries to get you to move out, you can always use "you know i'm only 13, right?" (;
imosim 0
#9 you missed...
SuperPineApple 0
Nuh uh 2 more and I get an UAV :P
dolphincheddar 10
That's when you turn to your mom and say, you know your 50 right? Parents hate being called old, and I assume she's in her mid 40s or early 50s, what I'm trying to say is make that vag-blocking ***** feel old
CattyPurry 0
dolphin, do you kiss your mother with that mouth? :O
bonerlicious23 0
no but I kiss his mom dolphins mom :)
dolphincheddar 10
My mother is dead.
enonymous 9
I kiss dolphins mom and grandma since they both came with those free panties he gave away last week. I like my women like I like my alcohol... Stiff and a hint of fermaldahyde
dolphincheddar 10
She's still in the fridge if you want some. She started to smell funny so I froze her
tatababe 1
She probably said that so he would stop flirting with you
NeonBluee 8
No shit sure lock.
relevantusername 0
It's Sherlock. As in Sherlock Holmes.
WOLFEYES72 2
110... Epic fail. It's no shit sherlock not sure lock.
jizzwold 21
I'm just gona hope spellcheck messed up Sherlock for them
VeroAnne 11
Well, I sure hope you don't look 13.
BlueCereal 2
Retard
NeonBluee 8
Sorry, my bad. Next time I'll know :)
CookieMonstr19 0
Did she actually think tht u wer 13 or did she just say it to make him stop flirting with you??
NuckinFutz 4
No shit Sherlock. That's why it's an FML dumbass
NuckinFutz 4
109*
KoolKidFly 0
Am I the only one who spotted this? It says a cute guy works there that op fliers
KoolKidFly 0
FML, I accidentally pressed send. My iPod crashed so I couldn't complete it. Be merciful with your thumbs please
CallMeMcFeelii 14
Lol..sure lock. That's ******* hilarious. I find that more funny than the fml itself haha.
sus346 2
**** blocked by your mum, that's harsh! How old was the guy? Maybe it was for your own good.
mouxouxou 11
Even if it was for her own good wouldn't it be better to talk to her daughter?
guitgod1 11
right...because the "I don't think you should date that boy" conversation always goes over so well with teenage girls.
Yodaevil 4
So you can pass as a 13 year old??
DoubleDose 0
if you can pass for a 13 year old then I'm guessing the cute guys response was "yeah, that's why I want her"
Sweetcupcakes123 6
Or he was like oh shit! Cause sometimes girls develop early. I did. I'm 19 and look pretty much the same as I did when I was 13. Guys hit on me then if they didn't realize it.
pfx2_fml 15
**** block
FacePalm69 0
****** block
kevint9911 15
Dude, u don't go out much do u, ur comments on here suck, she's not a hooker so it's not **** block, it's making out block
partyfool2011 4
Twat swatter.
gamerhead 3
102- ****! You beat me to it...
pfx2_fml 15
I didn't realize you have to be a hooker to be **** blocked
pfx2_fml 15
I didn't realize you have to be a hooker to be **** blocked
hoodasswhitekid 0
I get the feeling that your kind of a chode, even without meeting you I can tell, it's like I have some sort of chodey sense. just like a spidey sense, only different.
Bonghittinglover 3
protective moms.. Better than having a mom that doesn't give a shit about you.
suprmidgt 0
no it's just as bad. I've seen the aftermath too many times.
eminemchick 19
ive listened to aftermath too many times
iLOLatURpain69 7
Eminems mom didnt give a shit about him. Hes 80 some million records worldwide?
superangryandy 2
I was
intothecrypt 3
James Hetfield was closer to his mom than his bandmates, he has how many more records sold?
eminemchick 19
ive never heard of james hetfield-.-
pfx2_fml 15
**** block
elliewantscake 8
Dude. No need to post it twice. We got the point.
cheer4ever96 8
your mom's a **** blocker, but on a more positive note, she probably only did it for your own good.
fap5v 2
Aye :)
everybodyluvsMEN 0
How often do you go to the bowling alley for him to flirt with you regularly? O.o
VandalHeartX 0
And while you're answering that, if she's as overprotective as everyone says, why did she never notice before? Either she was drunk this time, just joking, it took her this long to figure out a good way to shut him down, or she is completely oblivious. Whichever it is, I think it's safe to ignore her and keep talking to the guy, if for nothing more than to set him straight on your age. Still, that is ****** up.
Friaza 29
It was probably just a joke.
california283 6
.. or the mom wants him for herself!
RavenLovesGir 0
Okay, how the **** does the first comment that said something VERY similar to this have too many thumbs down to show, but this has 26 thumbs up...?
karagana 5
Or maybe the other times she was there without her parents?
karagana 5
That was for number 121
joeblownc 0
robbing the cradle!
Mekeritrig 15
That's just evil.
BOOSCAREDU 0
It's more than evil! It's diabolical Ö
Awesome_Guy2468 0
That sucks you should be really be mad at you mom I would....FYL
kcircuses2 4
thank you for that witty comment
promarkchris 6
who goes bowling with their parents at 17?
shybear15 0
Just because you're a certain age doesn't mean you shouldn't make time for family... I still go places with my family...and so does my 18 year old sister
slimjim8094 12
Some of us don't hate our parents. I know that's hard to believe, but I have a functional family and I see my parents frequently. They see their parents as frequently as time allows. It's sad that this is unusual.
omgcookeys 15
15, apparently op does. And, you're never really too old to spend time with family.
taylorlandry 0
People that want to hangout with their parents every now and then
enonymous 9
Smelling funny is the best part. It brings you back to when you'd visit your grandma and she forgot to shower for a few days
jizzwold 21
I don't understand why people want to spend time with their family. It's just a group of people you are born with. Why is it mandatory to love a random group of people I didn't choose?
sparklecherry 4
What's wrong with that?
shybear15 0
Jizzwold... There is something wrong with you... I was adopted by my aunt and uncle... Nobody else took me in... I cherish the moments I spend with family... You should too... Cuz they might not be there forever
jkrist 7
mother/daughter or father/son teams obviously
beachVkid 4
Its always good to spend time with your parents no matter how old you are.
jizzwold 21
I don't think there is anything wrong with me 132 **** you too though. I'm just saying I don't have to spend time with people that I don't like and who I find annoying. If they were anyone but family members Im sure people would agree that I have no reason to be with them.
Lachiew 11
Anyone who wants to