Today, I went bowling with my mom and she paid for 2 games. By the 6th frame of game 1 she was bored and to get her money back for both games she told the employees I shit my pants. I'm 17. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went bowling with my parents. This cute guy works there and he always flirts with me. My mom just so happened to see it today. As we left, she says to him, "You know she's 13, right?" I'm 17. FML
Today, I went for dinner and bowling with a woman I met online. The Mexican food was great but my bowels started feeling it during our first game. I slipped on the bowling lane and the impact of my ass hitting the ground made me shit myself. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided to take me out bowling. My mom was going to take us. My parents ended up bowling with us. I had a double date with my parents. FML
Today, I went bowling with my friends. As I was about to take my turn, my friend came up behind me and yelled in my ear, "Don't mess up!" Startled, I dropped the ball on my foot. FML
Today, I went bowling with my girlfriend, her sister and her brother-in-law, and her niece. After 10 rounds, I came in last place. Her niece is 3 years old. She got twice as many points as me. FML
Today, my mother came up to me at swim meet and shouted to me in the bleachers "If you have to go potty, go now because there is a long line!". I'm seventeen. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend out bowling. The place was not only packed, but on my very first attempt, I stumbled and landed flat on my "sugarbuns" about 6 feet down the lane. Everyone pointed and laughed hysterically, including my girlfriend, who was on the floor almost in tears, enjoying my pain. FML
Today, after I'd spent two weeks convincing my friends I could definitely beat them at bowling, on the first throw of the night, I slipped, launched the ball into the gutter three feet in front of me, and somehow pulled a muscle in my back. FML
Today, I was ringing a lady up at the register. I noticed her son was doing the peepee dance, so I rushed the payment process up and handed her the receipt. The little boy said "Mommy" and the mom looked down, then back up at me saying, "Your problem now" and walked out. The boy had pissed on the floor. FML
Today, I went shopping with my mother. I needed to use the toilet, so entered a restaurant. After I left the toilet, my mother, who was near the restaurant's entrance, called out and asked, "Did you flush it?" Everyone heard her. And I'm 22 years old. FML
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Top comments
Melanie_fml 0
I would never go anywhere with her again. Nice to know that your dignity is worth less than 2 games of bowling to her.
Seegtease 0
Your mom ADD much?
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Comments (50)
Seegtease 0
Your mom ADD much?
ishatmypants 0
this ones like ishatmypants.com
hollynipples 0
Hahahahahahahahahahhhahaha!!!!! I LOLed so hard at this. Your mom is awesome.
jjstock 7
Hahahahahahahahaah I laughed so hard!
dirty_laundry 0
what??? that is NUTS!
Melanie_fml 0
I would never go anywhere with her again. Nice to know that your dignity is worth less than 2 games of bowling to her.
greenman_fml 0
that's hilarious. your mom sounds hot
kEnNy172 0
creeper troll.... gtfo
rosaleehoohaha 0
and you look like a pervert
xXxRandiexXx 0
#6 annoys me can you not read? or are you just a dumbass?
NorfolkDude 2
Your mom is awesome! I would have said something like I cut my fingers, but your mom came up with the coolest ever. Sort of like the "hair in the soup" tactic. I mean there's no way around it, and no one with a brain would dare argue that point by asking you to show your pants. This isn't really that bad, I mean if you don't go there or know anyone, then what's the harm? You'll probably never see that person ever in your life.
katieatieay 0
i'm pretty sure #6 can read. he/she just doesn't believe the fml.
bobdole 0
MILF
omgshesgotballs 0
how stupid do you think we are to believe some of the shit on here? why would they give you your money back because you shit your pants?
emilypancakes 0
billy j, you seem to consistently write dumb ass comments. and then follow them with just trying to help :) obviously you're not helping, you're just showing the world how much of a douche bag you are.