Today, I watched Paranormal Activity, which is known to be "the scariest film ever." After the film, I went to brush my teeth and out of the corner of my eye I saw the bathroom door closing by itself. I jumped out of my skin and stabbed myself in the eye with my toothbrush. It was just my dog. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to see the latest Paranormal Activity movie with my mother. We were terrified and held hands at one point. The person sitting behind us thought it would be hilarious to abruptly scream into my mother's ear. She reacted by flailing and driving her arm straight into my face. FML
Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML
Today, I couldn't sleep. I had to pee really badly but I'm terrified of the dark, so I closed my eyes all the way to the bathroom. On the way, I tripped over my dog and fell face-first into the door frame. He then humped me as my nose bled all over the floor. FML
Today, I was watching a horror movie with my girlfriend. Suddenly, the killer jumped on screen. My girlfriend screamed. I pissed myself. FML
Today, while brushing my teeth half asleep, I stabbed myself in the eye with my toothbrush, toothpaste included. FML
Today, after I got off work, as I walked into the house, I noticed something running across the floor towards me and out of complete terror I kicked it halfway across my living room, not knowing what it was. Turns out it was my roommate's new puppy. FML
Today, before I went to bed, I watched a terrifying movie with zombies. I woke up with a headache, a bloody nose, and my mom standing over me frantically asking me what was wrong. Apparently I had been "fighting the zombies off" in my sleep and had been punching myself in the face. FML
Today, whilst brushing my teeth, I fell asleep, poking myself in the eye with my toothbrush. FML
Today, I saw a big, black spider on the floor of my bathroom. I promptly jumped up on the toilet seat, slipped off, and slammed my head against the wall. The best part? It was a tuft of my hair. FML
Today, I saw the pumpkin I had put out for Halloween was starting to get mushy. I went to put it in a trash bag when it slipped out of my hands and burst over my knee. My dog heard the noise, ran into the kitchen and attacked me out of panic. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
dangit714 0
That movie wasn't scary. It's just 5 minutes of two people sleeping on a camera, then the frickin' door moves. It was a waste of my time to see and obviously the worst horror movie I have seen so far. YDI for being a god damn pussy.
Lucky2u 0
known to be the scariest movie ever? that movie was worse than the Blair witch project. complete trash and ydi for being scared of it.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (167)
dcchick13 0
The movie wasn't that scary, but it was a little freaky to say the least. but it reallly sucks that you stabbed your eye! hahaha
silverx10 0
YDI for being afraid of Blair Witch 2.0. And you say it's "known to be the scariest film ever". Known by whom? I'm almost entirely certain that Event Horizon is leaps and bounds scarier than Paranormal Activity.
tangerine_12 0
That movie wasn't scary at allllll. I was expected to be scarred but I never even had to close my eyes once, and people who are saying, "That movie is sooooo scary, don't watch it unless you're over 17!" Liars! It's not scary, really. A 6 year old could see it, literally. OP: I would have loved to see you poke your eye. Sorry, but it would have been hilarious. :D
Aha09 1
I laughed that whole movie...until she threw his body at the camera haha.
DarthRant 0
Sorry about your eye... but oh my God, your post made me laugh! Thanks!
DarthRant 0
Event Horizon is an excellent movie. For real creeps, try "The Descent".
hypa_kitty 0
or ... was it? :p
jayon 0
FAILLL!
epicfailismylife 0
Okay, people have their own opinions about a movie. It's not even a movie. It's a documentary about demon possession. That shit's serious. You're not supposed to mess around with stuff like that. Sorry about your eye!
LoosechangeXxXx 0
Ok if you are still getting scared or scary movies you should not watch them and to be that afraid of the door moving you could rationalize in your head first why it is moving so basically you are stupid and you should have stopped being scared by the time you where eight so YDI you fail!