Today, I was texting my boyfriend when he said, "Hold up." Thinking it'd be funny, I ran and grabbed my copy of the movie Up, and took a picture of me holding it and sent it to him. He replied, "Getting real tired of your shit." Then dumped me for my "dumb taste in humor." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was feeling really down, so I texted my boyfriend and asked him to tell me why he loves me, thinking he would cheer me up. His response? "Don't bug me with this stupid shit anymore. You always ask such dumb questions." FML
Today, my boyfriend came over and dropped off my phone, which I'd left at his place the night before. He immediately left in a sulk. As I looked through my texts, I discovered he was only so moody because I hadn't answered any of his calls or messages. I'm dating an idiot. FML
Today, my boyfriend sent me a text that said, "I can't be seen with you anymore. You're too fat." FML
Today, I was talking and joking with my boyfriend. He said "Hey wanna hear a joke?" I said "Yes." He said, "Our relationship." and walked away. He seriously dumped me through a one-liner. FML
Today, my boyfriend emailed me this morning to let me know that he had forwarded the joke that I had sent to him to all of his workmates and friends. He was quickly given the heads-up by one of his friends that all of our intimate emails from the day were also included. I'm dating a dumbass. FML
Today, this guy I was seeing dumped me for "bombarding" him with text messages. I'd sent him one text asking if he was okay, after he stood me up 2 nights in a row. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by sending a GIF. Not a sad one either. It was a GIF of some dude disappearing into thin air. Ten out of ten for originality, but come on. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend of 2 years because I was tired of his childishness and anger, so he decided to send me 540 random text messages of scrambled letters in order to mess up my phone as well, as make me pay 20 cents for each message. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by covering my car with post-it notes that read "it's you not me." FML
Today, I received a text breakup from my boyfriend while we were sitting right next to each other on the couch. He said, “This isn’t working,” and I had to ask, “Is this a joke? You’re literally here.” His phone was on silent. FML
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Top comments
Harpy20 24
He's the one with no humor. GOOD RIDDANCE.
PETRONAS_fml 10
You know what... You actually rock.
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Comments (157)
davincidasecond 24
You'd be a keeper in my book OP. People need to know how to take a ******* joke.
minidrone_fml 11
The guy sucks, your "hold up" version is very good !
Lesyriad 14
Op if you are reading this I feel sorry that your ex had no sense of humor. I think what you did was funny. If you ever read this send me a message I live in Utah also.
omgomgomg_NO 13
Your ex is a moron.
graphicstyle7 17
That was funny and cute. He does not deserve your wit or intelligence. Good riddance.
aliciaanomalyyxo 12
He's an asshole, go be with some one who appreciates you , that was pretty funny he didn't need I be rude about it
journeytotheend 16
Marry me
NodakN8V 25
Sounds like something I would of done to. That's funny.
functional 13
I would be am excellent boyfriend to you: I love your sense of humor. If I weren't gay.
DarthVader77 9
The only thing I did not get: are you bragging or complaininig? If it is the latter I do not understand you.