Today, I was stuck on a campus tour with my subtly racist mother who, in an attempt to seem open-minded, deemed it appropriate to refer to our black tour guide as "Sistah". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to explain to my white girlfriend that dating me doesn't give her the right to call my mother the N-word. FML
Today, I had no idea my mom was low key racist until I told her I was dating a black woman, and she told me that was fine, just as long as I didn’t do something silly like fall in love with her or let her distract me from finding a proper wife. Wow mom, just wow. FML
Today, my straight, white, Christian stepmother greeted my black friend with, "Hey my n****a!" He hasn't talked to me since. FML
Today, I caught my mom in the back row of one of my lectures, so I confronted her. Apparently she’s been doing this all year to make sure I’m paying attention in class and not making friends with the "wrong sort of people" (yes, she's a racist as well). I can't wait to move out of her house. FML
Today, I went to visit my overly-posh mother for the first time in many years. Upon arrival, she kicked me out because my outfit did not follow the same color-scheme as her decor. FML
Today, my mother continued her lifelong habit of talking to anyone who isn't white in extremely slow, exaggerated "caveman" English. She insists that she isn't being racist, but rather is helping. FML
Today, I introduced my mother to my new girlfriend. My mom made a very nasty comment about her in Spanish, not realizing that my girlfriend teaches Spanish at the local school. FML
Today, I had to slowly and very seriously explain to my mother why there is no 'White History Month'. I can't believe we are actually related. FML
Today, the mother of my most boneheaded student got upset when her “precious baby” miserably failed my class. She then threatened to accuse me of failing him due to racism, because I’m black, somehow overlooking the giant camera on the ceiling I installed for my own safety. I hate my job. FML
Today, I was busy going over wedding plans with my fiancé, when my mother called. Apparently, she wants me to "drop the joke" about this "fake engagement", because she was under the impression I was only dating a white guy to piss her and dad off, and was now getting carried away with it. FML
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Top comments
Crofty92 17
Hopefully people won't assume you're a racist just because your mother is.
sdroze1389 31
Lol the worst part is you look racist by proxy now. just say she's off her meds and hope for the best.
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Comments (71)
XoAlexxxoX 5
Party foul indeed. As a bi racial woman, I'm inclined to say that what she said wasn't too bad but indeed prejudice. That sucks, especially in public. I've had people assume I couldn't afford something because of the color of my skin. At least your mom didn't go all Anthony Cumia on her. Look it up!
vikky538 29
the situation where yoi cannot escape.. your mom needs a push ...sorry OP
mageepaigeee44 15
My mom refers to Asians as "orientals". It's so embarrassing. I call her out on it constantly but it's so engrained in her vocabulary.
R3TROxLOV3 32
My mom thinks every Asian person is Chinese. My best friend of 13 years is Korean. Despite her sleeping over at my house and just being around my family in general over those 13 years, my mother can't remember that she's Korean. Any time she meets an Asian person who wasn't born in America, she asks them what city of China they came from. No amount of correcting her has yielded any results.
ooft 8
Old people these days
kingdomgirl94 29
My mother in law still calls Native Americans "Indian", which is weird because where we live there are tons of people who are actually from India!
Sakuraashita 15
Take the tour guide aside and whisper, "My poor dear old mother is delusional, she believes she lives in a convent..." Seriously, though, FYL, OP, hope it doesn't hurt your chances of getting into that school.
JRT98 12
But what if they're secretly sisters from another mister.... And the guide is just trying to be professional.
alex_gen 39
So she can't say "Sistah", but people of all races, but white, can say "Nigga". Gotta love the irony of that. The more offensive word is allowed in public usage, while the least offensive is only becoming of a racist. Ok, here comes the downvotes. Whatever.
davincidasecond 24
Lol, seriously, you're upset about that? I'm black, and I have a problem with ANYONE calling me "nigga", "******", or anyone of its variants. And it's especially foul (sorry but it's true) when white people complain about not being able to use the word without dirty looks, when whites have been using it since forever (and STILL DO, use it in my experience) to demean blacks. How's that for irony?
Kris1520 14
I would have died