Today, I was singing in the shower, when some suds from my shampoo fell into my mouth and down my throat. I retched and sputtered for about two minutes before finally throwing up. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I choked on water so hard that I threw up and shat myself. FML
Today, after I finished dinner, I was getting ready to wash the dishes, but first I needed to take my vitamins. I accidentally gagged myself and puked in the kitchen sink of dirty dishes. I had to clean vomit and the dishes. I vomited my entire dinner. FML
Today, I vomited so hard into the toilet that the water splashed back into my face. I instinctually moved away only to finish puking on the floor. FML
Today, I wasn't feeling well at work. While I was in the bathroom losing my lunch, a very large piece of food came up. The resulting splash of toilet water went straight up into my mouth. FML
Today, I was very sick and kept throwing up. I took a shower after every time I threw up. While in the shower after I threw up, I had to throw up again, so I got out and ran to the toilet. I slipped on the tile, broke my nose on the floor, and then threw up. FML
Today, out of nowhere, I started violently choking on my own saliva and shat myself in the process. FML
Today, I had a terrible stomach bug. I quickly jumped off the toilet and crouched over the bowl. I vomited with such force that I splashed the shitty water back into my face. FML
Today, as I showered, I sneezed, hit my face on the wall, got shampoo in my eyes, slipped on a bar of soap, bashed my head on the wall as I fell, grabbed at the walls to stop me from falling and happened to turn off the cold water, scorching me. FML
Today, while showering, I finished off the shampoo bottle. I decided to see if I could shoot it into the trash can over the shower curtain. When I heard the successful "thunk", I got so excited I slipped and cracked my head open. FML
Today, I was brushing my teeth and shaving in the shower. My favorite song came on, and I got mixed up. My tongue and mouth are cut badly now. FML
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Top comments
Pleonasm 36
Gives new meaning to the word Soap-Opera.
AussieChild 22
This problem can be easily solved in future: don't sing in the shower.
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Comments (80)
Shadow_Phantom 26
Sounds like you need better shampoo... that isn't made of weird chemicals you can barely pronounce.
annie_nk 23
Even if it was all natural without these weird chemicals you speak up, shampoo isn't meant to be in your mouth.
TheMathMajor 26
I know Aveda makes some shampoos that are so natural you could eat them and be okay. Not meant for eating, but still, I don't think they would make you throw up.
SirFawkes 16
On the plus side, you'll sound pretty bubbly to everyone now.
AholeCop 11
Dial? More like bile.
annie_nk 23
Seems like the suds didn't like your singing.
1dvs_bstd 41
If you sing any Justine Beaver song in the shower, you're gonna have a bad time!
eggmarie 25
If you keep overusing these horrible jokes, you're gonna have a bad time.
photoquilty 6
Suds had that effect on you? Don't ever drink alcohol, then.
danaavery 5
Because shampoo and alcohol taste totally the same.
superminty 18
At least you were in the shower - minimal clean-up. Sing in the bathtub next time? Where gravity's on your side.
obviousboy 8
Retching is throwing up.
aliceroseA7X 0
no it really isn't. retching is like gagging not throwing Up.
pradip 26
That must've been a most bubbly vomit ever..
gracehi 33
Slit
gracehi 33
How the **** did that get there? Butter fingers I guess.