Today, I was sick from both ends at work. My boss wouldn't let me go home, and told me to borrow a pair of spare pants to change into. I suffered another bout of gastroenteritis and shit someone else's pants. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was constipated and strained so hard that I threw up into my pants and all over my shoes. I was at work, and no, I didn’t have a change of clothes. FML
Today, I have food poisoning. My boss told me that if I didn't come into work, I'd be fired. Not 30 minutes after sitting down, I sneezed and shat my pants. My boss still won't let me leave. FML
Today, at work, I felt a sudden, all-too-familiar pain in my stomach. I ran for the restroom, but before I could get there, I shat myself. I had to limp the rest of the way, then beg my boss to let me go home. He said no and told me to get back to work. FML
Today, I was at work alone with a stomach bug. For some reason, our bathroom was out of toilet paper, so I had to quickly run to the nearest store to buy more, only to shit my pants midway there. I'm pretty sure the cashier knew exactly what had happened. FML
Today, at work, I went to fold a pair of pants that was left in a changing room to find out that someone had taken a dump in them. FML
Today, as a reward for starting to eating healthy, I got the squits at work. After going to the restroom, my stall didn't have toilet paper, the other two stalls didn't have any either. My boss definitely noticed too when he walked in on me with my pants around my ankles. FML
Today, at work, the seat of my pants ripped open. A coworker lent me a pair of his back-up jeans, and then those ripped in the crotch. FML
Today, the bladder infection I thought I was over flared up at work, causing me to piss myself, despite having gone twice in the previous hour. I still had to finish my shift, soaked pants and all. FML
Today, at work, I had a coughing fit so bad I actually shat myself. What felt like a gallon of liquid crap poured down my trouser leg onto the floor. I work in a competitive office and this happened in front of 30 spiteful coworkers who love posting pics online. FML
Today, I had to shit worse than I thought possible at work. I left my desk and hurried towards the bathroom, dropping trou as soon as the door closed. I then tripped over my pant leg, hit my head on the toilet, and came to some minutes later with my ass spewing diarrhea like a volcano. FML
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Top comments
ThrottleJockey 36
Time to get HR involved.
Joshwarrior 39
Just document what he said and get sick on your boss. Hr will side with you (:
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Comments (13)
ThrottleJockey 36
Time to get HR involved.
lexos 16
Time to sue your boss
RichardPencil 32
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I hope you mean EX-boyfriend situation! Oops! I did it again! I played with your heart...
Charlie Coffman 14
they said boss....... not boyfriend, moron......
RichardPencil 32
It’s a continuation from the previous story. The previous story required the “I hope you mean EX-boyfriend” comment and this one requires the “Sounds like a shitty situation” comment. Why not jazz ‘em up?
Nina 34
I, for one, appreciate the joke, Mr. Pencil.
Joshwarrior 39
Just document what he said and get sick on your boss. Hr will side with you (:
Lobby_Bee 18
Throw those soiled pants on your boss' desk and stare at him with your hands crossed half naked.
Gingerwookie1997 5
Seems like a shitty situation
allie2590 31
Make your boss wipe your poopy ass
yeongji 31
I am not sure what the rules are in the states, but from where I am from, a diagnosis like gastroenteritis means you cannot return to work until 48 hours after the vomiting and diarrhea has subsided. I have had gastro a few times before, so I understand your pain all too well. Like others have said, report it to HR (and occupational health if that exists in your workplace).
RichardPencil 32
Did you get the pants laundered or hand them back as-is to show what a shit your boss is?
Jane Dose 5
And this is why people shoot up their place of work!!