Today, I was out shopping, when I noticed a teenage girl with a double stroller picking up a pack of condoms. I couldn't help but mutter that it was a little late for those. A guy who must have been her boyfriend then stormed over and beat the shit out of me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML
Today, while I was standing in line at the store, some guy insulted the girl in front of me as he walked past. She turned around and socked me in the face. FML
Today, my friend was waiting outside the store while I bought a newspaper. Through the window, I saw two guys getting physical with him, so I went outside and they took off. I muttered, "Yeah, I thought so." They then turned around and beat the crap out of us. FML
Today, I was buying condoms but was a little embarrassed so I went to the self-check. I scanned the condoms, then a magazine and tried to put the condoms under the magazines to hide them. The store guy saw me, thought I was shoplifting and I was kicked out of the store. FML
Today, I was in the 'intimacy' section of Walmart. After grabbing 2 boxes of condoms and a vibrating ring I turn around to see my ex boyfriend's mom. I smile awkwardly and put my head down as I walk away, causing me to colide with his dad and send my 'goodies' all over the floor. FML
Today, a friend asked me if I'd buy him some condoms because he's too shy to buy them himself. I obliged and whilst queuing at the till to buy them I felt someone tap my shoulder. I turned around to see my fiancée glaring at me. We don't use condoms. FML
Today, I found out what it's like to have your boyfriend's mom find your hidden stash of condoms in your car, then spend the next two hours shopping with her. Alone. FML
Today, I was at Target deciding what chap-stick to get when an old lady violently hit me with her umbrella and kept yelling at me saying, "You are too young for this! Think twice!" FML
Today, I walked in on my girlfriend cheating on me. The guy turned around and said, "Sorry, I borrowed your condoms." FML
Today, I was standing in line at the checkout, and my children were arguing with each other. The guy in front of me sighed loudly and told me over his shoulder: "There're these things called condoms, you know." FML
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Top comments
MonsterCommenter 4
You sir, have reached level 99 of Assholishness and YDI.
mpsteve137 15
I wish I could hit YDI twice. Douche.
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Comments (231)
Pascy007 2
YDI don't judge people!
sebaciel 3
You shouldn't have judged her, she could have been older than what she looked.
Shade1982 21
Lol, looking over all the comments, I can see most of these people apparently prefer violence over not having a sense of humor. Besides the fact if the comment was judgmental, how does that ever approve violence? Apparently freedom of speech is no longer a right these days. But somehow beating the shit out of someone is...
KevinFlynn 13
don't feel bad. I would have said the same thing
MrPortalFan 21
Maybe keep that shit to yourself next time? She could've just been babysitting or taking caring of siblings, douche.
Zzapper77 12
You are an uninformed judgemental clown on wich i will not spend any time of my life beside this info: 1) You must use protection after giving birth because of increased risk of infection 2) Having a sex life after birth is healthy and recommended as it will benefit the relationship and children in numerous different ways 3) As others have pointed out it might not be her children 4) As others have pointed out you dont know her age and she could be old enough to have children 5) You have no idea about her situation (thought up theoretical situation could be she was raped and the guy is not the father but just protecting her. In that case I would propably also beat the shit out of you) Besides that I hate people speaking out their negative commenent when they dont know the context and especially people like you who actually only show that it is in fact you who are uninformed (red. point 1 and 2). Asshat.
ENomine18 9
YDI x 1,000. Have you ever had sex? More than likely, seeing the douche you are. Don't judge her for what could have easily happened to you. Things happen.
RajArjan 1
I hope it hurt. A LOT!
GraceyGirl523 9
Condoms aren't 100% effective, asshole. I'm pregnant and my boyfriend and I ALWAYS used them
DarkAngel6914 4
once there was a women who freaked out when she saw my boyfriend and I cause she thought we had a kid, the kid is his 2 year old sister, forget the fact that she's blonde with blue eyes and we both have brown hair and brown eyes