Today, I was given the following pearls of wisdom: "My grandmother always told me, if you've got nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all. Anyway, she was a cunt and so are you." Thanks, dad. Thanks. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, during my father's funeral, I heard my mother-in-law mutter, "No loss there. Lazy cunt." FML
Today, my aunt's last words to me were, "Don't be an idiot". FML
Today, my grandmother told me that since my dad was a mistake, I too am a mistake. FML
Today, I found my childhood diary stashed in a box in the attic. I flipped to the last page and noticed a little note written by my now deceased father. It read, "Well son, this diary proves that you're a whiny asshole - Dad." Thanks Dad, from beyond the grave. FML
Today, my grandfather told me that I was ugly. When my mom found out, she said that, "Old people are allowed to tell the truth." FML
Today, I confronted my dad about his horrible attitude toward women. I pointed out that a man with as many sisters and daughters as he has, shouldn’t refer to women who’ve had children as “damaged goods”. He laughed and said, “Ah well, once it’s been blown out, it’s no good to anyone.” Thanks dad. FML
Today, I found out my deceased grandmother never liked anything that I bought for her. She would never say anything to not hurt my feelings. The only reason I bought those things in the first place was because growing up she told me that she liked them. Now that she's gone, I'm hearing what she really thought. FML
Today, I overheard my daughter compliment my mother by saying "My mom is way flabbier than you, Grandma." When I told her later that she hurt my feelings, she told me to "man up." She's seven. FML
Today, I took my kids to visit their grandma. At one point while playing, my youngest said "Shit!", so I admonished her. My mom snorted and told me to "stop being such a little bitch", because it will make my kids into "lame prisses like their mother." FML
Today, I overheard my dickhead dad telling my girlfriend that she's too good for me, then asking if she really wants to settle for someone like me. FML
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Top comments
stieglar 17
So what does he say when he's mean???
Emmamazing 26
I don't think he listened to her very much...
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Comments (45)
stieglar 17
So what does he say when he's mean???
friedpwnadge 25
My policy is polite honesty instead of just lying to be nice. He apparently forgot the polite part.
ChippyChoppy 21
How kind...
Ipeh 20
This is why I hate people...
mds9986 24
Well lucky for all of us, most people aren't like this.
Ipeh 20
If everyone were like this #8, FML would have lots of traffic. Lots.
cheshirecat13242 32
Brutal honesty ftw. Go now, seek refuge in your safe zone.
Emmamazing 26
I don't think he listened to her very much...
MoxleyCrue 17
Maybe he did and that's how he knows that she's a **** and his daughter is a **** just like her.
hayyyra94 10
And the father of the year award goes to....
mds9986 24
Obviously he isn't worth the time worrying about his opinion of you. Based on his need to say that, I wonder who really is the **** in this situation. Hint: it's not OP.
Richard6036 13
Real words of wisdom, how true !
next_session 16
Uhm maybe OP is a ****. Quit being a cocksucker. Sone people just ******* suck and maybe OP's saw that. We also don't know how old OP is. If she's like 14 then this is horrible. But if she's like 30 then she's obviously a big enough **** for her parents to notice
Mathalamus 25
He insulted his mother and daughter in the same sentence. Great job.
xTommytheGUNx 15
*grandmother
Adam_Power58 16
If he wasn't serious , he seems fair funny
donuts678 25
What could you have done for him to say something like that?
Dick_diamond 22
Way to blame the victim..