Today, I was at a restaurant with my boyfriend. I look him straight in the eye and ask him: "What's the first thing you think about when you look at me?". His answer: "Can I finish my steak?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were out to eat. The waiter came and asked what we wanted. My boyfriend said he wanted a cheeseburger and I told the waiter I'd have the same. My boyfriend looked at me and said, "Are you sure you don't want a salad?" FML
Today, while eating dinner with my boyfriend, I look up to see him staring at me, smiling. Hoping he wanted to say how lucky of a man he was who loved me deeply, I asked him what he was thinking. He replied, "You can't smell that yet? It was a noxious one." FML
Today, I was invited to my boyfriend's house for dinner for the first time. His mom made a fantastic dinner, so I showed my appreciation by eating the lot. Apparently I was overdoing it because when I looked up everyone was staring. His dad muttered, "Slow the hell down." FML
Today, I went out to lunch with my girlfriend. I asked if she was going to finish her meal, hoping to steal a bite or two. She somehow took this as me calling her fat, threw her drink at me, and stormed off. I just wanted some steak. FML
Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend. Everything seemed to be going well, when all of a sudden he turned to look at me with a pensive and thoughtful expression. I expected him to say something important, but instead he just said, "I was wondering, how does it feel to be fat?" FML
Today, it was my first time meeting my fiancé's parents. My future mother-in-law had cooked steak, hearing it was my favourite food. I somehow managed to bite my tongue, and then blurt out "Fuck!" just after she asked me how it was. FML
Today, my boyfriend of two years took me out to breakfast. We were eating and he kept on staring at me like he was thinking of something really important. I thought he was going to say, "I love you". So I told him to, "say it already." Turns out he was thinking of a way to dump me. FML
Today, I went on a first date with a guy. As soon as we sat down at the restaurant, he immediately snatched my menu and said "You're having salad." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he'd drive me to the jeweler's to pick out a ring. We drove there, I picked the ring, and the sales person rang it up. I glanced at my boyfriend, only for him to reply, "Well don't look at me!" FML
Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. When it came time for us to leave, I saw him write something on the receipt for our waitress. I managed to get a quick look; it was his number. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
cndrow 0
If you feel the need to bait your man with odd, open-ended questions, you need to evaluate yourself- not him. I know where I'm coming from, as I used to do the exact same thing, putting out bait for one specific answer that would make me happy and of course, rarely receiving it. It was because I had issues myself, mostly self-esteem issues and self-loathing issues. You need to look at yourself and why you feel the need to do this. Men are simple, and are happy to remain simple, and you should let him eat his damn steak and enjoy time with his girl instead of putting him through a psychological evaluation.
wafflemonger 0
Why would you ask such a question? If it's just the first thing that came into your head, maybe you should have thought about it harder. If you were doing it to test his love for you, you need to think hard about why you feel the need to do that. BTW, I'm a girl, so I hope you won't be offended when I say that there is pretty much no reason to ever ask that kind of thing.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (51)
hailhall 0
sounds like my boyfriend. one time i said- how much do you love me. he said- alot.
1384450244679 0
how the hell is this an fml? don't get all offended just cuz he doesn't want to talk with his mouth full..
lovemysnubber 0
let the man finish his steak. i'd have to take a guess and say your pretty needy
TehGirreth 0
YDI for fishing for compliments. I hate people who do that.
garc1795 8
Damn. Desperate much?
wafflemonger 0
Why would you ask such a question? If it's just the first thing that came into your head, maybe you should have thought about it harder. If you were doing it to test his love for you, you need to think hard about why you feel the need to do that. BTW, I'm a girl, so I hope you won't be offended when I say that there is pretty much no reason to ever ask that kind of thing.
sovietkiwi 0
Seriously... I hate when girls do that shit they deserve weird answers
bluevayero 42
NEVER get between a man and his steak. NEVER
cndrow 0
If you feel the need to bait your man with odd, open-ended questions, you need to evaluate yourself- not him. I know where I'm coming from, as I used to do the exact same thing, putting out bait for one specific answer that would make me happy and of course, rarely receiving it. It was because I had issues myself, mostly self-esteem issues and self-loathing issues. You need to look at yourself and why you feel the need to do this. Men are simple, and are happy to remain simple, and you should let him eat his damn steak and enjoy time with his girl instead of putting him through a psychological evaluation.
Helpfulman 17
Damn straight.
IKickPuppiesHard 16
Take all my thumbs up.
lewalrus 4
you deserved that. let him eat, woman. and stop asking such idiotic questions.
jnhill 0
what were you thinking?
Adam_B 0
Actually, you should appreciate that he's comfortable enough to be honest with you. And you know how you hear the stereotypes of guys who aren't always thinking about stuff? That's a lot of guys, and really, I'd say it happens to most guys at least sometimes. Sometimes it's just nice to unwind. Asking him a Cosmo question in the middle of that is like violently shaking awake someone who's sleep-waking, not a good situation.
jdkfgkjdfb 0
If I was a guy I'd say the same thing. Food first, weird questions later.
jsmith1199 4
Never get between men and our steaks
blueworld_fml 0
steaks are good. I love them. But how hard can this be. Say "beautiful" and break out your A1 and let that hang for a bit. When the steak is done, you can talk about why she is. However, if you just can't stand to be interrupted from steak, have the conversation going beforehand so that she's talking enough so she's not asking general questions to fill the space.
killer122 11
most people don't realize that when a man is eating steak or bacon that is physically all that is able to be in our heads. its just like this "mmmm steak.....................mmmmmm steak.....................mmmmmmmm steak" playing over and over again. the simple fact that he was able to pull out of that thought pattern and politely ask to finish is a sign that he really cares about you. if someone i just met asked the same question to me i would just have answered "steak " and continued eating