Today, I took my first Viagra. It worked great, but "Wally, the one-eyed wonder-weasel" would not return to "hiding". After 4 hours, I was in mortal aching pain, and went to my doctor for a shot and sedative. My wife, the doctor, and the nurse could not stifle their laughter. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to take Viagra. FML
Today, I took Viagra so we could have sex at bedtime. We fell asleep afterwards, but I must've had a reaction to the Viagra as it was still erect this morning and must have been erect all night, way longer than 4 hours. I went straight to hospital as my penis was numb and pale blue. Help me. FML
Today, I have erectile dysfunction but have also recently gotten a girlfriend. She is very understanding but I decided to try Viagra to get things going. I had the rare reaction of a boner lasting hours that put me in hospital. I can’t win, it’s either no boner at all or a boner that tries to kill itself. FML
Today, I was working at the pharmacy and had a older man come in. He was buying Viagra and, by law, we are required to ask if the patient had any questions. His lovely response was, "When you coming over so I can test this stuff out?" His wife and daughter thought it was hilarious. I could've died. FML
Today, I found out my husband has to take Viagra to get it up with me. He never needed it with his ex-wife. FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to stay the night. Before she arrived, I popped a Viagra to spice things up. She then informed me that she was on her period and didn't feel comfortable doing it. I had a headache and a massive boner all night. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's office because my wife and I are having some fertility problems. As I removed my pants, the doctor simply looked at my penis and said, "Mhm." My wife laughed the whole way home. FML
Today, my family and I took a trip to Mexico, along with my girlfriend. I bought some Viagra, just to experiment as I don't need it. My mom had me carrying around her cigarettes all day. When she asked for them, I accidentally handed her the box of Viagra and she freaked out on me. FML
Today, my wife made a joke about the size of my package, so figuring all's fair in love and war, I bought some laxatives to prank her with. They took a lot longer to work than I thought, and I ended up lying in bed, listening to my wife shitting her guts out in the bathroom for over an hour. FML
Today, I took pills to make sure I lasted longer with my girlfriend. Good news? It worked fine and is still working now. Bad news? We've been done for a good two hours. FML
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Top comments
IceCream53423 0
Wally the one eyed wonder weasel? YDI just for that
iFruit 0
I hope they shot that little mother ******. That ugly weasel is popping up everywhere!
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Comments (99)
Intoxicunt 6
I'm going to have to disagree with everyone here. I think the wording and the penis name were playful and funny. It probably wasn't a serious nickname for the dude's junk. I doubt that he says in his sexiest voice to his wife, "Honey, Wally the one-eyed wonder-weasel wants to burrow into Chloe the curtained clam while I squeeze Rita the round mound playground."
perdix 31
Poetry. Pure poetry. FTW!
Intoxicunt 6
Thank you. That took me a couple minutes on the names. XD
FarSide 23
He would have probably been done by the time he finished saying that....
Intoxicunt 6
Hahaha. Nice one, FarSide.
redbluegreen 41
I have never been more turned on...
FarSide 23
:)
chisai_luver 0
I joined FML just so i could agree with perdix. That was a FTW.
tencentsakiss 19
I actually think "wally, the one-eyed wonder-weasel" is from a movie or tv show, but I don't remember what. I could be crazy though..
jchansfan 0
YDI for taking Viagra. Yeah, I went there...
Ninjaface 0
It could have been worse. It could have been Weasel-Stomping Day (+1 to anyone who gets the reference).
dioxyde420 0
reference: got.
Maxine17 8
You should not be allowed a penis if you are going to name it that :O
FarSide 23
Why not? What do you call your penis?
Maxine17 8
Considering a penis is not something I own, I do not name it anything.
JustinBieberIsOK 0
what so do girls have to start naming their ******? lol
YankfanZZTop22 0
Im a dude and I didnt know lol thats kinda scary...
YankfanZZTop22 0
Pure Win
LadyRasafras 0
.... I can't bring myself to vote either way. I pity you for the lengthy pain... but... "Wally, the one-eye-wonder-weasel"?...
ladiesman14 0
i been hard for more than 4 hours before in high school. and also in bed with hot girls. is this a disease ?
FarSide 23
It definitely is a disease, especially if what is hard happens to be the head on your shoulders.
HarperGirl 4
to my knowledge (17) not unless its not natural, if your took a pill/gel/or something to mkae you hard than yes but as long as its natural i don't think its dangerous
martinezcory 0
haha wonder weasle
muffinz85 0
im laughing so hard "wonder weasle" lol.