Today, I took Viagra so we could have sex at bedtime. We fell asleep afterwards, but I must've had a reaction to the Viagra as it was still erect this morning and must have been erect all night, way longer than 4 hours. I went straight to hospital as my penis was numb and pale blue. Help me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I have erectile dysfunction but have also recently gotten a girlfriend. She is very understanding but I decided to try Viagra to get things going. I had the rare reaction of a boner lasting hours that put me in hospital. I can’t win, it’s either no boner at all or a boner that tries to kill itself. FML
Today, I had to take Viagra. FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to stay the night. Before she arrived, I popped a Viagra to spice things up. She then informed me that she was on her period and didn't feel comfortable doing it. I had a headache and a massive boner all night. FML
Today, I took my first Viagra. It worked great, but "Wally, the one-eyed wonder-weasel" would not return to "hiding". After 4 hours, I was in mortal aching pain, and went to my doctor for a shot and sedative. My wife, the doctor, and the nurse could not stifle their laughter. FML
Today, I learned there is such a thing as "too much sex". After a full week of having sex at least twice a day with my girlfriend, I had to go to the GP due to a painful erection and swelling. The constant sex had caused me to burst a blood vessel in my penis. FML
Today, I had to call the doctor regarding my penis. Not because of erectile dysfunction or an erection lasting more than four hours, but because of the multiple fire ant bites I woke up to after falling asleep in my backyard. FML
Today, my girlfriend had one of her seizures during foreplay. She’s fine, but I’m not, she had my penis in her hand and while seizing she squeezed it so hard she ruptured some blood vessels on the inside. I'm now walking bowlegged and on medication to stop me getting erections that might cause more damage. FML
Today, I took pills to make sure I lasted longer with my girlfriend. Good news? It worked fine and is still working now. Bad news? We've been done for a good two hours. FML
Today, I fainted for the first time in my life. I was in the shower. With my girlfriend. Apparently, my brain and my erection had a battle for who got the most blood, and my erection won. FML
Today, I woke up after a heavy night of drinking, with my laptop dead on my chest. Apparently, I had attempted a bit of digital penile oscillation, but passed out instead. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Don't worry. They're not going to have to cut your dick off. It's just going to fall off all by itself.
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
Blue penis or blue balls. FYL
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (3)
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
Blue penis or blue balls. FYL
RichardPencil 32
Don't worry. They're not going to have to cut your dick off. It's just going to fall off all by itself.
BurnInDemonFire 39
The old lit match trick didn't work? Sorry buddy, but you're screwed. And not screwed.