Today, I told my boss I have a sore throat. He replied, "Well, don't take it so deep next time." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, after telling my boss about my hearing problem, she simply told me to "listen harder". FML
Asshat
Today, I woke up with a sore throat and a stuffy nose. As my boss is an asshat who hates allowing sick leave, I thought I could power through it, but halfway through my workday I sneezed so hard that I threw my back out. I had to go home early and now I can't move without pain. FML
Earache
Today, I asked my boss for a couple of days off to recover from a nasty ear infection which has left me hard of hearing. However, he didn't understand why that would affect my job and refused. I work in a telephone call centre. FML
Seize the day
Today, I dragged myself to work, suffering from a bad cold. My boss quietly told me to go home and rest, to avoid spreading it around the office. I thought it odd since he dislikes me so much, but I did as he said. He called later in the day to suspend me for leaving work early. FML
Gummy
Today, I had a toothache and applied some numbing gel to soothe the pain. Too much came out and made my whole mouth numb. A man came into my work, thought I was making fun of his lisp, and stormed out really upset. He later called to complain about me. The boss just called me to his office. FML
The Voice
Today, I sent a voice memo of me singing off-key to my boss instead of the actual work-related attachment. My boss replied, "Don't get your hopes up, so stick to your day job." FML
Grind mindset
Today, my boss wrote me up for taking too many bathroom breaks. I tried calling in sick with a bad case of indigestion, but he told me to just power through it because, "it can't possibly be that bad." I have been in severe, persistent discomfort the whole damn day. FML
Seize the means of production
Today, I’m at home, sick with a really bad sinus and ear infection. If I'd gone to the clinic earlier, then it wouldn’t have spread to my ears, but my boss wouldn’t let me take a day off. FML
Today, my boss berated me in front of 2 other coworkers about how unprofessional it was for me to show up to work with a clearly visible hickey. I had to explain to him that my "hickey" was actually a huge pimple that had bruised up after I popped it. FML
Polite but wrong
Today, my boss walked in and said something I didn't quite hear, but my co-worker chuckled so to be polite, I laughed with him. They gave me some weird looks. My boss was actually talking about his wife's tumor and my co-worker was coughing. FML
Top comments
Hiimhaileypotter 53
The other day, a girl in my Spanish course asked the professor if, instead of tests, we could just do oral from now on to get better grades. She meant oral presentations like skits, but obviously it didn't come out that way. Talk about hilarious...I'm pretty immature so if my boss said something like this to me I'd laugh. :)
hunteredmundson 17
Well then don't
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Comments (116)
yerrkiddingme 2
that's so damn funny
quickit 24
Depending on your relationship with you boss you should act accordingly.
quickit 24
*your
MELKOZAR 27
Advice of the champions!
aimzskee 30
Sounds like your boss has a great sense of humour.
tdawg91 17
Anyone who says this is sexual harassment has clearly never worked in a kitchen before.... God forbid a boss and an employee share an inappropriate joke
Rayth 19
However no where in the OP's post does it mention that op is working in the kitchen or that OP is on such "friendly" terms with their boss. So technically with the information provided it can be counted as sexual harassment until further information is given.
Flowtastic 16
83 - no where in his post does it say he doesn't work in a kitchen either.
millertime911 15
#83, what happened to "innocent until proven guilty"? lol!
tbro47 23
I know this will be down voted, but the post reminded me of the saying it's a joke not a d**k try not to take it so hard. In all reality though yea he probably should have chosen his words more carefully
victoria63 12
I would report his ass and yes I'm still fun at parties lol don't take shit from him. It should be a professional work place!
CaptPatchy 2
Fat, no sense of humor, and thinks highly of herself. You're really striking out here.
squideth 18
That's probably one of the most disgusting comments I've read. Like "fat" and thinking highly of yourself are negative traits??? You're a miserable little child aren't you?
Sentaru 7
Depending on how close you are to your boss, friend-wise, that's either the best boss ever, or one of the worst.
8313girl 28
For all the people saying 'report him', it's sad y'all can't take a joke. OP is a male and his boss sounds male as well. It was meant to be funny and if I was OP's lady I'd say the same thing but that's my sense of humor. I can see that the boss has to cool it around you. Now I will say that if this happens repeatedly, especially anything physical, then let him know you're uncomfortable. For now, laugh it off and go have a beer.
Saicere 15
It's not about the ability to take a joke, it's about knowing the proper way to conduct yourself in a professional environment.
Treken 13
These people wouldn't last a day on a construction site.
captainsmegma 12
He could have said " well next time take it up the ass".