Today, my boss walked in and said something I didn't quite hear, but my co-worker chuckled so to be polite, I laughed with him. They gave me some weird looks. My boss was actually talking about his wife's tumor and my co-worker was coughing. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I sneezed so hard at work that I farted. In the silence in our open space office that followed, my boss looked over, smiled, and said, "Bless you?" The people in the office who weren't wearing headphones burst out laughing, then those people noticed the laughter, took their headphones off, and my boss then had to explain to them why they were laughing. FML
Today, at work, I misheard a customer telling me a story. To be polite, I did a slight laugh and nodded my head. She actually told me her mum had died. FML
Today, my boss was telling everyone his mother recently passed away and he'll be off work for a while. I'd been holding in painful gas for a while, so I tried to ease it out. It turned into a long, squeaky fart in front of everyone. Everyone glared at me as if I was trying to be funny. FML
Today, my boss threatened to write me up, after I made a slightly rude joke about a coworker everyone hates. A while later, a colleague told me the same joke. Turns out my boss had gone around telling it to everyone else and taking all the credit. FML
Today, at work, whilst on hold with an important client, I said to my co-workers, "Fucking hell, this woman sounds high as a kite." I heard a cough on the other end of the phone. All calls are recorded. FML
Today, at work, I sneezed so hard that I hit my head on my cash register. A second later, I heard roaring laughter from the security room, followed by someone saying to play it back. I'd almost convinced myself it wasn't about me, when one of the guys came out and gave me a thumbs-up. FML
Today, I was awkwardly taking a dump at work, when a coworker in another stall started talking shit to me about our boss. I grunted and agreed, hoping he'd shut up and leave me alone. That's when a third guy sarcastically chimed in with insults from a third stall. It was our boss. FML
Today, I walked into the office bathroom and saw my manager in tears. I tried to comfort her and gave her a hug. Turns out, she wasn’t crying, she was having a sneezing fit, and looked horrified at my sympathy hug. FML
Today, my boss came into the office asked how I was doing and seemed totally normal and happy, then said, "I have to let you go. I heard some bad things about you." He wouldn't tell me what he heard, or from whom. FML
Today, I mistook a coworker’s laughter for choking and performed the Heimlich maneuver on them in the break room. They weren’t choking, but now they’re afraid to laugh near me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
glitter354 0
Damn...next time just say "I'm sorry, I didn't hear you." There really is no good way to let your boss know what happened. So, FYL and YDI.
Perksofbeingawal 0
Omg that's awful. I've been in that position one too many times... :/
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (64)
wenta 1
stuff like that happens to me all the time... you just learn not to be nosy.
Suavis 4
uhh.. they weren't being nosy?
Ronnie_loves_you 11
could just say you were laughing at something you remembered and that you didn't even hear'
HaloReachIsCool 6
Hearing Fail
you_and_me_fml 8
that was not very smart on your part haha.. just tell him what you thought happened and im sure he will understand
iSCREAMMM 0
Just pretend that you were coughing too.
ozzy4u 0
Hahahaha
IgnorantAmerican 0
lol
mr_miyagi 0
hahajahahahahah tumors
SomePinkTape 0
clean out your ears
Ariasmake_1 0
more like clean out your office.
nybsucubos 5
BOOM HEADSHOT!
theten_fml 9
this one actually made me laugh
Perksofbeingawal 0
Omg that's awful. I've been in that position one too many times... :/
MagicMushrooms 0
That's what she said. Sorry.
Elmo_1526 6
lmfao xD
glitter354 0
Damn...next time just say "I'm sorry, I didn't hear you." There really is no good way to let your boss know what happened. So, FYL and YDI.
urdirtyolduncle 15
cute puppy !!
tygerarmy 35
Exactly, it's better to to allow yourself to ask a stupid question and feel awkward then to do something awkward and feel stupid.
glitter354 0
7 - thank you! She just died 2 months ago of cancer, she was 15 years old...FML
Emerant 0
Aw, I'm so sorry. She looks very sweet. :)
5t3ff1k4h 45
See, this is why OP should learn to never laugh at a joke unless they heard it clearly, especially if the person telling the "joke" wasn't even talking to them in the first place.
FYLorYDIohno 12
51: Her boss just walked in the room and talked, it's not like they were talking to someone specific. So, basically her boss was talking to everyone in the room.
bobkim302 0
Holy crap! If you don't know what's going on just sit there and do nothing. I'm sure you feel bad too. This has happened to most of us at one time also. It took years to just say or do nothing.
nicknesser 0
What happens when you assume...
Ariasmake_1 0
you make a decision without all the facts?
glitter354 0
It makes an ASS out of U and ME = ASSUME :)
Suavis 4
oooh clever :D I gotta remember that one
macskapingvin 0
When you assume, it turns everyone in the vicinity into a donkey?
xStiina 0
New job?
firefighterazz 0
Saturdays jobs sections looking good