Today, I thought it would be to a good idea to introduce my indoor cat to my dog. The pee stains, multiple scratches, and puncture wounds to my face prove otherwise. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Fight or flight
Today, my friend finally convinced me that if I picked up her cat it wouldn't scratch my eyes out. It peed on me instead. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided it would be a funny idea to spray me with a hose while I was holding a kitten, showing her how cute we were. Needless to say, now I'm covered head to toe in cat scratches. FML
Poor little guy
Today, my boyfriend and I tried to give his cat medicine. Unfortunately, it reacted in a way it never had before: clawed his arms to bits, bit him so hard a tooth fell out, peed everywhere, including on me, and pooped on the carpet. FML
Caturday surprise!
Today, the highlight of my day was going outside and finding that there were two very friendly cats right at the front door. The worst part of my day was quickly shutting the door while trying to stop my cat from charging at them. I now have scars to prove it. FML
Today, my dog wanted to go upstairs, but she has stitches and was having trouble. So I carried her to the top, at which point she peed all over my carpet. FML
Cats can do anything, but they have to want to
Today, after encouraging my cat to try his new cat bed all day with no success, I attempted to gently place him in it. Instead, he managed to fear-spray me in the face. Like a skunk. I didn't even know cats could do that. FML
Furry feral friend
Today, I'm covered in scratches because a feral cat found its way under the house and tore apart the A/C duct to climb its way into my room in the middle of the night. After 30 minutes of chasing it, I got rid of it, but my room now smells like cat piss and I'm applying Neosporin to places I should never have to. FML
Don't touch me
Today, I took my cat to the vet. As the vet reached to examine him, he hissed, then clawed me instead, and then ran straight into a wall. Now we’re both sitting at the vet's, scowling and injured. FML
Toot toot
Today, I was relaxing on the sofa with the cat purring on my lap. My husband blasted an air horn. I'm now covered in cat scratches and piss, from both myself and the cat. I'm going to skin him. FML
Today, I was messing with my cat by moving my hand around under the sheets to make it look like a mouse, making him pounce at it. Without thinking, I brought my hand up to scratch my nose and was immediately attacked by flailing claws. FML
Top comments
TheDrifter 24
Well of course you've got puncture wounds. You peed on her and scratched her. Poor cat.
birdly 3
Who's pee stains?
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Comments (70)
spicymeatballs 9
Well what was the matter? Cat got her tongue?
friedpwnadge 25
"I thought it would be a good idea" Famous last words.
MegaError101 10
*be to a good idea
jazzy_123 20
really #1? You got the first comment of the post and you come up with a pun that is completely irrelevant to the FML. Way to go. On another note, sorry about that Op. They'll come around sooner or later... hopefully.
lux0rd 18
@9. Main thing I learn from this website. If it sounds like a good idea don't do it. If it sounds like a bad idea however, go for it. Only things that will go wrong were things you were expecting anyway.
spicymeatballs 9
it wasn't irrelevant, and in the scope of life and its entirety, having the #1 post on a single FML is hardly a feat worth celebrating or lamenting, nevermind worth winning the approval of strangers whom I don't know.
TheCanucklehead 22
Yet you still came back...
spicymeatballs 9
Boredom and curiosity, 63.
jazzy_123 20
59, you obviously don't have your priorities set straight. Many people would kill to get first comment.... ok I feel some people aren't going to understand so I'll say it, sarcasm!
birdly 3
Who's pee stains?
RedPillSucks 33
Keith Stones new pet.
SgtAssCheeks 21
R. Kelly
TheDrifter 24
Well of course you've got puncture wounds. You peed on her and scratched her. Poor cat.
gracehi 33
"Fluffy, meet Rover. I'm sure you two will be great frie--GAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! MY FACE!!! ******* CAT!!!"
XBurytheCastleX 25
Thank you for that.
JMichael 26
You reenacted that perfectly.
slmchicd12 23
How long have you had each pet? Looks like you may need to pick one.
LoopyLuuLuu 7
don't necessarily need to pick one or the other, just keep them sequestered from each other, especially if the dog is an outside dog.
jdreiner 11
Yeah I'll bet you've had better ideas...
traviscool 12
Why did you attack yourself?
perdix 31
Good idea? Really? Ever heard the expression "fighting like cats and dogs?" That's been around a long time because it's true! I don't think you should introduce your hamster to your snake. There's not a handy-dandy expression to guide you on that one, but go with me on that:)
alex_gen 39
I don't know about you, but when I introduced a new cat to my indoor dog years ago. The dog was scared like hell of her. The first day was not good for them, but by the end of the week, they came to love each other and the cat would often lay down with the dog.
skittyskatbrat 19
Um, my cat and mom's dog were best friends. She and my dog got along great. She tolerates my current dog (he makes a wonderful cat pillow). The other cat plays with him. If the cat feels threatened during an introduction, yeah, it doesn't go well. If the cat is sitting somewhere up high where it can watch the dog first? It goes much better. Introducing them isn't a big deal but it has to be done slowly and in a way that neither animal is frightened. Through a baby gate has worked best for me. Cats and dogs that don't know each other will fight. Once they've figured they're part of the same family? It's either love or tolerance in most cases!
perdix 31
I had a dog and then brought home twin kittens. He adored them like he was their mother. It was sooooo cute. I'd say more, but it would tarnish the perdix persona :)
RedPillSucks 33
Is this the same cat that peed on your face? Perhaps a nice gold fish would be more your speed.
ItsMeDiegoG 8
When is that ever a good idea?
perdix 31
#12, if you have the dog first and bring in the cat. Dogs can be cool that way.
TresAmusant 11
If you buy and raise them together it can work out...otherwise it usually ends like this.
spenguin 1
It worked for me. Took 2 months of smelling each other through a fence... But it's all good now. Other than the occasional swat!