Today, I suffered an uncontrollable sneezing attack. I have the runs. It wasn't exactly as bad as I'd have expected. Just a lot worse. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as I was trying to get into the grocery store, I had a sneezing fit. I've typically never had one, so I didn't really know how to handle it. This one was a new record: 11 sneezes and I hadn't had the foresight to bring tissues. FML
Today, I sneezed so hard I fell down the stairs. FML
Today, I was on my way to work. Out of nowhere, my period started. Due to allergies, I had uncontrollable sneezes. Now, I have blood all over my pants. FML
Today, after just waking up, I sneezed, which caused me to piss myself. FML
Today, I had a cold and was vomiting. I sneezed really hard, smacking my nose onto the toilet seat. I woke up a few minutes later with my nose bleeding, painful, and still stuffy. FML
Today, I have such bad diarrhea that every time I sneeze I poop. I've discovered it's very hard to run to the bathroom every time I feel the urge to sneeze. FML
Today, I sneezed so hard that I threw my back out. Now my back is in agonizing pain, and I can barely walk. FML
Today, I had a sneezing fit in the middle of the night, like 10 really great big sneezes, but then it was over and I went back to sleep. I got up this morning and turned the light on, and turns out I’d been sneezing blood over everything, the bed, walls, carpet, furniture, clothes, everything. FML
Today, I've been having really bad seasonal allergies. I was at work, and feeling just about to sneeze for at least a full minute, but thought I could stop it. A customer came up to me, I opened my mouth to greet her… but instead sneezed right in her face. Several seconds before my addled brain caught up. FML
Today, I sneezed while I was throwing up into the toilet. It turns out that throwing up is even less pleasant when the puke violently shoots out through your nose. FML
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Top comments
RickySleeves 20
Bless you.
nattlecakes 19
Hope you were in a safe place like home where you could avoid embarrassment and wash off quickly. It must have been a pain to clean up though. FYL
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Comments (35)
toasted1 13
...a wise person once told me.... 'never fully trust a fart after 30'.....
TMO2142 25
well shit... that must suck. sorry OP
momac86 17
That's what you call a sheeze
Catdragon 40
I remember back in middle school I caught the stomach flu. I had to vomit, but I also had the runs. So when I vomited, the stress caused both ends to go at once. Not a pleasant experience. The nurses then bitched me out for not being able to control myself. Needless to say, I needed several changes of clothes that day.
Jennababy2792 20
has no one ever heard of immodium? that stuff could plug up the holes in the Titanic!