ThatsIncentive
Granite Bay, United States
Today, I stooped to pick up an earring back off the ground. It was actually a spider. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
That1FamousWRX
United States
Whatcha doin' up there?
Today, I went to pull a nose hair out, only to end up pulling a spider out by its legs. FML
buttercup92
San Antonio, United States
The passenger
Today, while hiking, I walked face first into a spider web. Freaking out, I shook my hair out in case there was a spider. Later on in the day the spider fell from my hair into my food. FML
gaggin
Beverly Hills, United States
Today, I woke up to find pieces of a dead spider stuck in my braces. FML
OuchImAMoron
This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff
Old Bridge, United States
Reflex
Today, I was cleaning a pocketknife when I noticed a spider on my leg. My first reaction was to stab it. FML
somuchforthat
Australia
Today, I woke up and found a small leg of what used to belong to a spider on the corner of my mouth. FML
baconandkittens
United States
Today, I was washing dishes when I picked up a plate and saw a huge spider. Trying to be nice, I took the plate outside and tried to gently push the spider off. The wind blew it into my eye. FML
Arachnaphobic
United States
Today, when putting something away on a high shelf, something small and black fell down my cleavage. I thought nothing of it and finished the task at hand. When I pulled out the neck of my shirt later to find it and looked down, glaring up at me from my boobs was a large, disgruntled spider. FML
yuckspider
United States
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
Anonymous
Littleton, United States
Top o' the mornin' to ya
Today, I woke up bright and early… because a spider crawled into my ear. FML
jillydark6609
United States
Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML
Top comments
cootiequeen4444 11
that's incentive... to never wear earrings again. and to burn all your old earrings as well as the hand that picked up the spider. who needs two hands anyways? one is good enough...ish.
cootiequeen4444 11
Wait. WAIT. Came up with a better one. That's incentive... to get a vision exam at the optimologists.
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Comments (16)
iAmToast 10
how tf does one mistake a spider for an earring
claudiajean 24
Poor spider, minding his/her own business and then suddenly they're being grabbed and put up to someone's ear. Hope you apologised, you swine
Mudge 11
and to think that it was sitting in your ear all that time