Today, I signed up for an online dating site. After completing their personality quiz, I set the distance to a 60 mile radius of where I live. Then to the country. Then to the whole world. I got no matches for any of the settings. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I completed the arduous, nearly hour-long process of answering the eHarmony dating questionnaire, only to be told my answers were too "unique" for them to match me with anyone. I had chosen "the world" as my distance range. FML
Today, I joined a dating website and spent all day filling out and improving my profile. My first match is a guy who relentlessly tried to date me for all 4 years of high school. Now he just has more reasons to tell me how much we're meant to be. We're a 97% match. FML
Today, after a nice Thanksgiving with my parents, and the usual question about when I'll bring a woman with me to meet them, I absentmindedly launched the usual dating app. I swiped completely dry with no matches, reminding myself that my entire city doesn't have one person interested in dating me. FML
Today, I convinced myself I needed to get over my ex-girlfriend. I spent twenty minutes signing up for a new dating site, only to find out, that the only other profile on the site of a person within 200 km, is my ex-girlfriend. FML
Today, I re-joined a popular on-line dating service. I'd first signed up 3 years ago and was matched with a wonderful woman. After about a year, she broke up with me. I was devastated. After two years of trying to win her back, I'd decided it's best just to move on. Guess who they matched me with? FML
Today, I signed up for an online dating site. In order to prove I was human and complete my registration, I had to pass a CAPTCHA. Coincidentally enough, the words in it were "depressed" and "loser". FML
Today, I signed up for an online dating service, a couple of days after my divorce. I got my first batch of matches, and number one was a smiling picture of the woman who had just divorced my ass after 20+ years together. Her profile shows she has to have been active there for months. FML
Today, I'm so single, I signed up for a free consultation on an LGBT arranged marriage site. FML
Today, I decided to try an online therapy site, seeing as I have been feeling very lonely and don’t have any friends to talk to about my issues. After filling out all the initial forms, the site told me there was no one available to speak to me. FML
Today, I signed up for a dating site and used a photo of my mother and me at a wedding. Everyone stops responding when they find out they're talking to me and not her. FML
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Top comments
sLap_fml 0
it just means that your perfect match hasn't signed up for that website, and that you will meet them another way : )
vonswede 0
The same thing happened with my mom. Eharmony told her she was too selfish to find a match.
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Comments (157)
ballshhhhh 0
I call shnannigans
bigbadnews122 0
HAHAHAH FAIL!!!!!
wordout 0
LOL at #9, but I'm an atheist too and I go to catholic school...
wordout 0
oh yeah and #53 epic fail is not a lame phrase.
aquarius6 0
That's bull ... There's a match for everyone.
WTFIWWP 0
you have to wait a couple days.
Thanx4thecandy 0
awwwwwwwwwwwww i'm so sorry. Don't worry you'll find someone :D
eternity4ever 0
Don't take it too seriously... A lot of online dating sites sucks !!! Or you can always just go back and take the test again, this time with different answers, and see if you like any of the matches :))
Mancubus 2
#93, a venue crowded with teeny boppers and goths is hardly the place to pick up people who aren't sad or desperate
skaterpunk8678 0
YDI for online dating. Dating is about chemistry, not how much personality quizzes are the same. Half the fun of a relationship is pissing your girlfriend off by doing something you like that she doesn't. Just go out and try and find someone, that's the best way.