Anonymous
Colorado Springs, United States
Today, I shut one of my breasts in my car door. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
catherineratley
Carmi, United States
Today, I shut my finger in the car door. The door locked. Then I dropped the keys on the ground and couldn't reach them. FML
MerryDeathmas
Lloydminster, Canada
Roadworthy
Today, after an argument with my girlfriend, I tried to be dramatic by slamming my car door shut as hard as I could. Something broke and now it won't open. Now I have to climb through the passenger's side just to drive my car to work. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I accidentally slammed a door on my own arm flab. FML
Ouch
United States
Today, as I was closing my car door, I realized I had left the keys in the ignition. Not wanting to lock myself out, I reached to stop the door from closing. Not only did I scream when the door slammed on my hand, but in my furious pain, I leaned on the door, locking my keys inside. FML
Anonymous
New Zealand
Today, I found out how it feels to have a car door slammed shut on my hand, breaking two of my fingers. Hint: it's fucking painful. FML
MikeNick
United States
Today, I somehow managed to slam my trumpet case closed on my nipple. FML
seththing
Today, I locked my keys in my car. I had a spare key in my wallet, that I also left in the car. FML
Anonymous
Canada
Today, I locked my keys in the car while the car was running because I got out to get the parking ticket attached to my windshield. FML
Smile
France
Today, after numerous attempts, my car door still wouldn't unlock. After going ballistic on the lock, the key broke off inside. I then realized it wasn't my car. FML
slapstick1982
Port Washington, United States
I'm so tired
Today, after double-checking to make sure the garage door was completely open, I backed my car into it. FML
Top comments
karlcolt45 19
that's like when dudes sit on their balls. there are no winnings...except for the inanimate objects I suppose
XCrazyMofo2010X 17
Are they that big?
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Comments (225)
Fuaaad1994 31
Pics or it didn't happen
swick25 22
oh how original and stupid. cause that's the first thing OP is thinking, "oh I just slammed a tit in my car door, I better take a picture because someone on FML I going to say pic or it didn't happen!!!! got to have that proof for the dumb ass!!!" ******* stupid comment
HowieDoIt 21
Breathe, man. Count to ten, and chill for a minute, trust me.
gracehi 33
Haaaaaa, 23. Your reply ended up under the wrong comment. And I'm not even going to list all the grammatical errors you made. So who is the dumb ass now, hmmmm? :P
gracehi 33
Well, shit, I guess I'm the dumb ass now. Touche, mods, touche.
swick25 22
I don't give a shit about my grammar errors. don't you have something better to do rather then bitch about grammar errors?
swick25 22
ya your the dumbass. lol sorry I just went off in you about grammar. not a good day but I do apologize
gracehi 33
Clearly I don't have anything better to do at the moment or else I'd be doing something else, now wouldn't I?
speakersboom 19
*you're "went off in you".... intellectual extinction is upon us, my comrades.
fooltemptress 36
I hope it's not swollen, otherwise you'll be quite lopsided for a few days!
kinky44 28
Did you sue the car for sexual harassment?
lailaxjan 11
FYL, because I'm sure that hurt like hell, but I really want to know how one accomplishes this.
Cass_x 22
please tell me you're a woman
Llama_Face89 34
If you look next to the title you will see that it tells you OPs gender.
Godsofdracos 15
If you use the non official fml app it doesn't tell you the gender. It also has a really cruddy layout, so if your using it you should switch.
sickerthanyou 13
If you are a woman, I'd like to know how big your boobs are, if you are a guy, you need breast reduction surgery
jloko16 11
I'm glad I'm part of the itty bitty titty committee.
reymon8823 24
How itty bitty is your titty committee lol
jloko16 11
Very very itsy bitsy teeney weeney
Smoxxii 17
162: Yellow polkadot bikini! ;D
blackonblight 33
I'm with you. The "Too small for 'A Cup' Club" is a happy place to be. Poor OP.
Enslaved 38
I'm sure you'll be able to find a few guys willing to kiss it and make it all better.
TheElBurrrito 21
Dibs!
Enslaved 38
Well-- Your picture shows that you enjoy playing with boobies!
speakersboom 19
I can't picture op's boobs as anything other than one full water-balloon next to one limp air-balloon.
Mynamewontfi 40
How?
xXxODINSONxXx 5
How the **** is this even possible. No matter how big your breasts may be. Why would you shut the door while still standing facing like into the car?