Today, I shaved my lady bits for the first time to surprise my husband, who I haven't seen in months due to deployment. I ended up with razor burn and my dim-witted husband believes I cheated on him and that it's an STD. Nothing will tell him otherwise. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend is coming over. We haven't seen each other for a while so for a surprise, a few days ago, I decided to shave my pubic hair. I've come up in a huge rash that looks like some sort of infection. Not quite the sexy surprise I was hoping for. FML
Today, I got the courage to surprise my boyfriend by shaving my pubic region. To my agonizingly painful dismay, the razor sliced through an apparent zit on one of my lips. Now my vagina is bleeding for a whole different reason, and I'm possibly traumatized. FML
Today, I used a men's hair removal cream to be smooth for my partner, as a surprise. It turns out that doing that made her think I was cheating on her. FML
Today, it turned out the razor I used for manscaping wasn't as new and sharp as I'd thought. My entire crotch is now overcome with an unfathomable amount of razor burn. FML
Today, my fiancé asked me to do some manscaping. I got a little overzealous and now I look like a 12-year-old boy with razor burn. FML
Today, I shaved my vagina for the first time ever. Had sex with my husband and then asked if he liked that. He said, "You've done that before, though". I haven't. We've been married 15 years. FML
Today, after a lot of begging, I finally convinced my husband to shave all of his pubes off. Now I can't even look at it without laughing, and he's mad at me for making him do it. FML
Today, my husband decided to surprise me with some "sexy" manscaping. When he took his clothes off, I immediately got drier than the Sahara desert. He was going for "porn star" but instead looked like a prepubescent kid, which immediately turned me off. He then got mad at me for “ruining the mood.” FML
Today, I tried shaving my bikini area for the first time. I ended up cutting myself several times. I now have impressive razor burn, and it's incredibly painful to even wear pants. FML
Today, the novelty of shaving a heart into my pubic hair for my wife vanished, when I woke up to find a collection of scabs around my pubes. FML
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Top comments
Nysha 17
<p>It is quick and easy, and it's always a good idea to get tested, but it doesn't solve the problem that OP's husband apparently has zero trust towards them.</p>
kaysheik 16
Why not go get an STD check to show him it's nothing? It's quick and easy
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Comments (36)
tracyswingkid 8
Of course, since that was his first conclusion, you can be sure he cheated on you while deployed.
AndronicusPark 10
They recommend a trial run before complete removing hair from delicate areas. You can figure out what works best for you and if it sucks you have time to get rid of the bumps and razor burn. Ydi for not researching more.
militarybrat 21
Military spouse here. Don't get tested. If he doesn't trust you...for ME that would be grounds for divorce.
Fmlreadermostly 20
Sounds like a guilty conscience for him to argue so adamantly.
darkangel7410 17
To everyone bashing the husband you should know a few things. 1. The military likes to tell you nothing but horror stories about other soldiers who have come home to a cheating spouse or empty house. Most of which are true. 2. Loneliness makes people do really dumb shit. It's not just about trust because blind trust in anyone is stupid. 3. There are literal FB pages dedicated to talking about why it's "ok" to cheat on your military bf/gf/spouse that have more members than I care to count. 4. Last but not least the military strains your ability to trust people at all given the fact people will use you as a scapegoat at a moment's notice.
dragonladiesfire 19
I agree he should trust you. However, it is surprisingly common how many wives do cheat on their husbands while they are deployed. His buddies could have very possibly been going through that and he could have started getting extremely anxious about it and is just letting fear get to him. and seeing that you did change (shaving for the first time) could have just led him into that fear more.