Today, my husband decided to surprise me with some "sexy" manscaping. When he took his clothes off, I immediately got drier than the Sahara desert. He was going for "porn star" but instead looked like a prepubescent kid, which immediately turned me off. He then got mad at me for “ruining the mood.” FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my fiancé asked me to do some manscaping. I got a little overzealous and now I look like a 12-year-old boy with razor burn. FML
Today, I walked in on my husband masturbating. I thought it was hot and asked if I could join in. He threw me a disgusted look and screamed that I’d ruined the whole mood. Now we’re both unsatisfied. FML
Today, I tried to surprise my husband by wearing something sexy to bed. He didn't say anything, just laughed and left the room for 10 minutes. The little confidence I had disappeared, so I changed, feeling stupid for thinking I could pull off sexy. He got mad at me for being confusing. FML
Today, after a lot of begging, I finally convinced my husband to shave all of his pubes off. Now I can't even look at it without laughing, and he's mad at me for making him do it. FML
Today, I had a date with this really cute guy. He invited me over to make dinner at his place. Eventually we end up in his bedroom to have sex. He pulls down my panties and says, "You need to shave that shit." FML
Today, wanting to surprise my boyfriend, I shaved everything "down there." When he saw the result, he burst out laughing and said I looked like a plucked chicken. FML
Today, although the I’ve always kept my pubic hair neat and trimmed, my boyfriend once again complained that I don’t shave. When I told him that shaving is uncomfortable and risks ingrown hairs, he sulked and said, “But it’ll look so much better!” He needs to lay off the porn. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around. When he slipped his hand down my pants, he scratched my pubic hair and said "scruffy, scruffy, scruffy." FML
Today, I shaved my lady bits for the first time to surprise my husband, who I haven't seen in months due to deployment. I ended up with razor burn and my dim-witted husband believes I cheated on him and that it's an STD. Nothing will tell him otherwise. FML
Today, my date saw me naked, and was disgusted that 1. I shaved my pubes into a landing strip instead of completely bald, and 2. I missed a few hairs below my knee while shaving my legs. His actual words as he was half out the door were that he "wanted Princess Leia, not Chewbacca." FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Shaving is supposed to make it look bigger. If he looks "prepubescent" after manscaping, we don't even want to imagine what his bushy crotch looked like!
Chazzster 32
In addition to the visual impression of looking bigger now that you can see it out of the brush, it’s usually better for the giver of oral sex not to have a face full of smelly pube hair… But we all have our likes and dislikes. Not everything we try is going to work out as we intended.
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Comments (2)
RichardPencil 32
Shaving is supposed to make it look bigger. If he looks "prepubescent" after manscaping, we don't even want to imagine what his bushy crotch looked like!
Chazzster 32
In addition to the visual impression of looking bigger now that you can see it out of the brush, it’s usually better for the giver of oral sex not to have a face full of smelly pube hair… But we all have our likes and dislikes. Not everything we try is going to work out as we intended.
Yudith 28
If the goal was to look bigger, he should have settled for the airstrip look, or the Hitler's stache look. This way, you have the big d*ck look without the ten-year-old-in-a-shower look.