Today, I saw a man dancing to a Britney Spears song in his Volkswagen Beetle. I started laughing hysterically until he got out. He was huge. I was stuck in traffic. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was walking home down a small street while listening to my iPod. I really got into the music, and started to dance really badly, only to realise there was a car following me, trying to get past. FML
Today, I was dancing in the passenger seat of my car with my family when a cop pulled us over. He thought I was trying to flag him down for help. I guess I'm not as good of a dancer as I thought. FML
Today, I was singing and drumming on the steering wheel in my car while stuck in traffic, only to realize the car next to me was full of my carpooling coworkers, all staring at me in disbelief. They spent the day at the office requesting songs. FML
Today, I got stuck in traffic and angrily honked at the car in front of me. Then I realized it was a hearse. FML
Today, while driving to work in heavy traffic, I got so into the song I was listening to that I tapped my foot on the gas to the beat. I rear-ended the car in front of me. FML
Today, I was singing loudly in my car at a red light, completely oblivious. When I finished the song, I turned to see a bus full of passengers watching (and also some of them filming) my performance. FML
Today, my car was in the shop so I borrowed my wife's VW Beetle convertible. It's really embarrassing because it's a girlie car and it's full of little stuffed animals. At a stop light a man asked me if I'd like to borrow one of his testicles because "every man should have at least one." FML
Today, as I stopped at a traffic light, I noticed the man in the car next to me break out in laughter. I pulled over later on to see that someone had drawn a large penis on the side of my van. I then spent all my morning cleaning it off. I went outside later only to see someone had redrawn it. FML
Today, at work, a good song came on and I started dancing to it. I guess security thought my Michael Jackson crotch-grab was funny, because a printout of it is now pinned in our break room. FML
Today, I was waiting after work in a parking lot for my ride and was dancing a little to keep warm. Next thing I know the cops pull up to me and said that someone called in to report someone dancing in an empty parking lot. FML
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Top comments
Blacksxe 1
Say you are laughing because you just remembered a funny joke. If you're lucky you will live.
flamerocker 9
It was you?
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Comments (139)
stevenmx86 8
You've got to have a brain the size of a pea if that made you laugh hysterically.. Dumb ass...
ShyAnn29 15
I like Britney Spears too!
YayFlameWarz 9
Moral of the story; Don't **** with Britney BITCH!
Broc831 6
that's when you join him in dance
alexandraaaa 0
It's Britney, bitch.
jerry2011 4
What happened then?
OddBob 1
Hopefully you acquired some wisdom along with the contusions. That's how it usually works.
CreamyGoodness_1 7
Dang dude that's not cool.
Coolguyt2 0
Lock your doors?
ideasrule 13
I highly doubt he would dare to touch you while in the middle of traffic. That seems like a sure way to get into jail.
OddBob 1
Jails are full of people who don't think that far ahead.