Today, I realized two things: how much time I've spent waiting between lectures, and just how bad my love life is. I found out that I get incredibly jealous when somebody sits on my favourite bench in the centre of the campus. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after complaining that I had nothing to write about in my weekly journal for college, my professor suggested in front of everyone that I should get a girlfriend. FML
Today, I was hitting on a girl who was getting ready to walk into the same class as me. We were waiting outside the room, so I told her that I'd heard the professor for the course was a total bitch. We walked into the room. I sat down at a desk. She stood behind the podium. FML
Today, I set up a date between my roommate, who I'm in love with, and his crush, who I'm jealous of. FML
Today, I found out what the two girls I sit near to fight about every day: seating. The loser has to sit next to me. FML
Today, I found out that my classmates hate me so much that they have a seating arrangement where people have to sit next to me on a rotating basis. A fight broke out yesterday because someone tried to skip their turn. FML
Today, I spent the day studying with one of my classmates whom I've just met. While studying, she kept bragging about her boyfriend and decided to show me a picture of him. It was my boyfriend. FML
Today, I went to my Calculus lecture, one of a class of 200 people. As I looked down I noticed that a guy a few rows in front of me was on Facebook. When I took a closer look, I noticed he was viewing my profile. He stalked the profile for a full 45 minutes. I have never met this guy in my life. FML
Today, I heard that a boy in my class had written a song about me. Intrigued, I went to see him perform. I spent 3 excruciating minutes listening to a song about 'the girl of his dreams', his tear-filled eyes staring into mine the whole time. I have to sit next to this freak for the next 2 years. FML
Today, I realized I hate my life now. Everything changed. My friends changed. I don't like Paris. It's cold and lonely. It's nothing like Emily in Paris. I'm overstressed with uni and my future. I want a break. FML
Today, I had to admit that my jealousy issues were becoming a problem when I almost told my boyfriend not to apply at the local McDonald's, because of the high school girls that would see him there. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Levi2411 41
Hey now, love life has nothing to do with it. I too get obscenely jealous when others touch/go near objects that I have claimed as mine. "No touchy." -- Rule 146.
sonasonic 34
Break up with it. You deserve better.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (14)
Levi2411 41
Hey now, love life has nothing to do with it. I too get obscenely jealous when others touch/go near objects that I have claimed as mine. "No touchy." -- Rule 146.
RichardPencil 32
No one should sit in "your spot," Sheldon!
sonasonic 34
Break up with it. You deserve better.
Kitty_Kat44 31
It's part routine. If that's where you sit on a day to day basis I can understand your disappointment when someone is sitting in your normal spot.
914smv 18
Have you tried any dating sites to meet people? maybe that will help?
Notesz_b 13
So...You fell in love with the bench?
Rozay333 36
I feel the same way about other people reading my books before I get a chance to finish them. I dont know why, but I get super jealous about my literature... Weird lol
dietcoke09 25
Maybe you should start seeing other people (benches)?
tnebert 8
I'm happily married, and still get salty when my favorite study spot is taken.
RichardPencil 32
I hope you mean ex-bench!