Today, I realized the guy I like is not deaf. This would normally be good news. However, for the past two weeks I assumed he was deaf after seeing him use sign language. I've been openly talking about him within earshot. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a deaf customer came to my work. In an attempt to connect with him I introduced myself in sign language. He just rolled his eyes and pointed at my name tag. FML
Today, I was texting a guy that one of my friends told me about. She gave me his number and told me about how he was deaf. Three hours into great conversation I forgot and asked him what his favorite music was. FML
Today, my sister introduced me to her new, deaf boyfriend. She proudly proclaimed that she was trying to learn sign language for his sake, so he wouldn't have to read her lips. I'm also deaf and have been trying to get her to do the same for me for 20 goddamn years. FML
Today, I pretended to be deaf to a door to door salesman. He knew sign language. FML
Today, I was so desperate for human interaction that I asked a deaf girl in my class if she liked music. I actually signed it to her. FML
Today, I was at the airport, when a lady came up and loudly asked if she could sit next to me. I have serious social issues, so to avoid having to talk to her, I pretended I was deaf and couldn't hear her. She immediately broke out her sign language skills. FML
Today, I found out that my parents don't know the difference between a foreign person and a deaf person. They've been yelling at our exchange student for the past 2 days. FML
Today, I realized that the guy that I've liked for the past 7 months is actually a girl. I've told all my friends about how much I like him, but no one bothered to tell me that he's actually a girl. FML
Today, I arranged a date with a girl online I really get along with, because frankly we both have a filthy sense of humour and love sexting. At the date, it turns out she’s deaf, which is not a problem, but she brought her sister as an interpreter. Without our usual conversation, it was just painfully awkward. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend of 2 months has been faking his southern accent. FML
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Top comments
twinny_sc 13
Wow that's stupid because even deaf people can read lips.
1fast1 0
Karma is a bitch, isn't it....
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Comments (172)
YupThatsLiv 0
how him? how you like him? how you wanna bang him? so many questions
russianspy1234 11
When you assume you make an ass out of u & me.
robc32ca 4
if you liked him what kinda crap did you say about him that would have turned him off you?
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
I know I would've been turned off by hearing what was obviously a stranger prattling on about how much he or she liked me.
blacknazi818 0
FIRST!
lajaynay 15
1 and 29 are the same thing these days.
nascar1477 0
lmfao!!
JC_64 0
dude... ur 29th not first... ...
bigbadtim 7
You are a jackass for assuming that he was deaf because he was using sign language. If you really cared about him then if he is deaf should not make a difference to you.
amazinggbaby 2
It doesn't say it does make a difference. She liked him when he was apparently deaf. The fml is that he knows whatever she openly said about him.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
The "that would normally be good news" could imply that she viewed the deafness as a drawback. I gave OP the BOTD, though, and assumed she was basing that on the potential communication issues.
sweetTnt_fml 0
OP...YOU MAKE NO FUKIN SENSE!
Flounder 2
I feel your pain OP. I had a crush on a CODA in our group of mixed deaf/hearing friends. Most of the time CODAs will let you know they're hearing, but every now and then there are some hearing people (CODA or not) that will "pretend" to be deaf, and absolutely refuse to speak to you. The guy I liked was one of those, and I didn't find out until later. At no point of me standing in front of him and asking friends next to him about him (if he was busy at that moment in conversation with someone else), or me signing to him, did he ever hint that he was hearing. It's a creepy mindset but those people are out there.
SAMHAlN 0
ydi for liking someone who sings like a deaf person
liloneex3 0
signs*
OmgO_o 0
idgi? :o
bloobelly 0
you suck at writing! FYL.