Today, I realized that every targeted advertisement on my Facebook involves gym memberships and diet pills. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realized that every other targeted ad I see is for some sort of dating app. I've been single on and off for 5 years now, and it's starting to get to me. FML
Today, I discovered I am the "before picture" in an internet weight loss advert. FML
Today, I was looking online at the gym memberships in my neighborhood, because I'm getting old and unfit. As I was looking at the prices, thanks to some well-placed advertisement magic, I found myself ordering a pizza, then binge-watching Netflix. It seems that motivation is just a click away, but pizza is my kryptonite. FML
Today, I discovered that a company has been using a photo of me for one of those "she lost 50 pounds" online ads. I'm the "before" photo. FML
Today, I registered on an irritable bowel support group, unknowingly linking it to my Facebook wall. FML
Today, my girlfriend tried to look at my phone and I turned it away from her. Now she’s convinced I’m cheating on her. In reality, I’m too embarrassed to admit it’s because Facebook is showing me nonstop ads for laxatives after I ordered some two days ago. FML
Today, my dad asked my help with a computer problem. Whenever he logged on Facebook, every single advertisement appeared to be hardcore porn. I had to awkwardly explain that these ads are based on his browsing habits. FML
Today, during the trailers at the movies, my boyfriend elbowed me in the ribs and smiled when an ad for a weight loss institute was shown. FML
Today, I found out that the daily "vitamins" that my dad has been giving me for the last three months were actually weight loss pills. FML
Today, I saw a weight loss 'before and after' advertisement and I wished I could at least look like the 'before'. FML
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Top comments
unknown_user5566 27
I know it's not true, but I always imagine an office full of evil Facebook employees picking the most offensive advertisments possible for every user.
Welshite 40
He's gone high-tech.
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Comments (107)
Welshite 40
God is trying to send you a message.
MURIKKA 11
Because god operates through Facebook ads....
Welshite 40
He's gone high-tech.
xrosevertx 4
God isn't real.
Danny0522 8
Why do you think people have all of those religious posts?
gc327072 31
^Good point. It's a lot easier to do good things on the Internet than it is in real life, anyways.
jetsown08 21
OP obviously didn't repost a status showing they loved God and now OP shall be smitten in the form of fatness.
_Oblivion_ 12
Op scrolled past one of those annoying "like or die" posts
CaptTeemo 10
Oh no.. I'm going to hell because I didn't like or share!
desireev 18
You should have shared that damn photo of Jesus on the cross!
Dixbfloppin 11
Oh God, those people are the annoying door-knocking bible-shoving asshats of the internet.
MormonPornstar 7
19 - Regarding your picture: The sun burns hydrogen from it's core. Religious Bitches: 0 Atheists: 1
BulldogHoops 14
94- Way to ignorantly categorize all religious people as "bitches". This really showcases your broad knowledge of the world.
annetartica 6
Hmmmm....maybe that's a sign?
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Oh, you meant a roadsign. Right, gotcha.
Feared 9
The way she goes
ozone9914 2
For real fight your fatness don't love it and keep it
thebeautybleeds 17
Yeah. A sign to get adblock.
MoerGrapeDrank 0
Does the sign say whale crossing?
KiddNYC1O 22
Start countdown to Facebook's inevitable demise.
unknown_user5566 27
I know it's not true, but I always imagine an office full of evil Facebook employees picking the most offensive advertisments possible for every user.
LaughinStock 16
4 it's true I've seen this place, its full of old myspace employees. I'VE ALREADY SAID
unknown_user5566 27
WHY ARE YOU YELLING? :)
LaughinStock 16
Sorry, the black suits tried to get me. :-/
tymarie2012 31
I will never get that image out of my head..
lil_ham1644 29
Yeah, I had to have an emergency hysterectomy last spring (I was 20) & for the next few months I kept getting ads for baby stuff. I finally got so depressed I deactivated my account.
Bradley_Dillon 39
Facebook and Google ads are chosen by what you've searched.
sweetmama88 6
Maybe that's gods way of telling you to get up off your butt and go to the gym !
unknown_user5566 27
Your profile and username say you're "sweet". I feel duped.
KiddNYC1O 22
They nailed the very honest part...
ozone9914 2
why does this comment have so much dislikes? Like what the **** is wrong with going to the gym
unknown_user5566 27
77- Nothing's wrong with going to the gym. It's just a ******* rude comment. See, I can use profanities too!
desireev 18
78- *Adding to my list of favorite commenters right now!* Definitely, a win.
laden_swallow09 35
Yeah, I never understood "******* rude". Someone's accusing another of being offensive, yet using an offensive word to describe just how offensive the person was is nothing short of hypocritical.
person961 9
It's Facebook, they advertise what you usually click on and browse, at least I think they do.
chatoyant_fml 12
Big brother of our time
Tookie22 5
Ya it's mostly based on job and your interests. Maybe you like working out, so they aren't implying you're fat.
Hockeyboy4280 18
6- It's true, **** ads are CONSTANTLY showing up on my account...
wolfhausen 7
Or if they use google plus/have a yahoo account the companies save your most frequented sites. Your just getting what you've already looked at slammed back in your face :/.
sjdbeinska 4
...maybe it's a sign
s0m3guy2010 21
At least you're not getting targeted Viagra or Cialis ads all over your Facebook. I think that'd be worse that gym membership ads.
DocBastard 40
All of my Facebook ads are about asses and holes. What the hell does that mean?
unknown_user5566 27
That just means Facebook thinks you're interested in Donkeys and Golf. Don't sweat it, Doc. ;)
SqueakyChipmunk 22
It means Facebook wants you to be a proctologist.
gc327072 31
Or a pirate doctor. They study booty.
shneakycactus 2
anyone else want to try to find doc on facebook?
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Nope.
matt98_fml 13
Ehhh most of them are fake anyways.