Today, I pulled out three chips from a bag. There were two round ones, and a skinny one, making it look like a penis. I laughed. I'm 33. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was eating chips with my father. After I finished eating a chip I felt something between my teeth, It was pubic hair. I soon realized my dad was scratching his testicles while eating chips. FML
Today, I was eating chips with my father. After I finished eating a chip I felt something between my teeth, It was pubic hair. I soon realized my dad was scratching his testicles while eating chips. FML
Today, I was doodling randomly during a meeting at work, and I noticed my drawing was beginning to look a bit like a penis. A coworker was eyeing it so I tried to make it something else by adding... oh good, now it's a penis and balls. FML
Today, I ripped my old, worn underwear while trying to pick a wedgie in public. Half ended up in my hand. FML
Today, for the first time ever, a woman saw my penis. I am 30 years old. The woman was my doctor. She snorted to cover a laugh and apologized. FML
Today, at work, I tried to sneakily open a bag of chips I had hidden in my desk drawer. The bag decided to explode as soon as I tore it open, sending chips flying everywhere. My boss chose that exact moment to walk by and saw me on the floor, frantically picking up chips. FML
Today, I realized that potato chips are made from potatoes. I'm 26. FML
Today, I had nothing better to do than make a penis out of silly putty. FML
Today, I was eating a packet of chips while watching TV. I saw a crumb on the table in front of me, so without thinking I picked it up and ate it. It wasn't a crumb. It was a tick. FML
Today, I was at a restaurant with a girl I like, and as I was getting my wallet out, I dropped a condom. She didn't see anything, and I didn't dare pick it up in case I drew attention to the "object". The waiter walked past, picked up, and held it out to me with a huge grin. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
mkymkm 0
cocks are funny whatever age you are :)
pogostick_fml 2
I don't understand how your life is ****** by this.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (82)
ErikvonDarkmoor 0
The mods on this site are useless...
TheButler 0
OMG get off this website and start writing english essays! seriousl TOO MANY WORDS!
yummcookie 0
more of an MLIA they always post childish stuff there
thatwhitekid09 0
wow it's not a big deal that's pretty funny
Parthenia 0
Please people, enjoy the updates you get or just ignore them. Better posting fml's some people might like than not posting them at all, why get less if you can have more? I enjoy everything on this site when I'm bored :)
superninja333 1
Lol. That's a good MLIA.
MangeMoi_fml 0
I dont get it.
movies12 0
I thought that was hilarious actually. Who cares if ur 33? what cause u think it's immature, adventually u need to laugh at stupid things. LOL
Tazzabell 0
PUT IT ON MLIA NOT FML STUPID RETARD
FML_IS_FUNNY 0
i wuld die laughin at this.....but den again im extremely immature 4 ma age lmao