Today, I picked up a penny off the street for good luck on my job interview. A few seconds later, a hobo beat me up, took my wallet, and ran off. The whole ordeal made me late for the interview. So much for good luck. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML
Today, I was going to my first job interview since I was laid off. About 10 yards from the door, I felt a sharp pain in my side and something in my pocket. It turned out to be a knife in my side, and a mugger robbing me because I looked rich. I haven't had any money in months, and missed the interview. FML
Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML
Today, I was running late for a job interview so I took what I thought was a shortcut through an dank alleyway. I ended up getting chased by a pack of stray cats and arrived at the interview covered in scratches and cat hair. FML
Today, a hobo threw up on my car while at a red light. He then asked me for money. FML
Today, I was walking downtown when a bum approached me for some change. I planned to give a couple dollars but after pulling out my wallet exposing my cash, the bum beat me unconscious. The bum is a 5'0" tall woman; I'm a 6'2" male out $200. FML
Today, after months of searching I finally got a job interview. Too bad I didn't have enough money to buy a bus ticket to get there. FML
Today, I went for a job interview. Before giving me a tour, the manager pointed to my purse and said, "Better leave that in my office." I didn't know why it was safer in her office than on my shoulder, but I complied. Later, I went to buy coffee and discovered that all my cash was missing. FML
Today, I went to pick a penny off of the ground for good luck. Someone kneed me in the butt, I fell face first and broke my glasses. FML
Today, I was in a bad mood after being stuck in traffic for 2 hours and late for work. I was walking to my building when I saw a 100 dollar note flying my way. A man called after me for it, but being selfish I took the note in my pocket as a little reward. That man was my boss. Yes, I'm fired. FML
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Top comments
Arsonnist 3
Heads or tails?
FFML_314 12
He's a bum! Chase his ass down and steal his shopping cart. There's bound to be something worth while in there.
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Comments (88)
5t3ff1k4h 47
The penny obviously wasn't heads up then. YDI for not knowing that only the ones with the heads facing up are good luck.
SpaceMannn 0
i sure hope the hobo didnt pee on you after he beat you up.
Elizabeth123654 0
my uncle's a hobo.
angtaffe 0
was the penny tails up?
Richisme 0
u fell for my trap!
StevenSS 0
pussy
alfalfa101 0
don't u kno it has to be face up for good luck
happyk 0
No hobo is random. You should know better.
shockwave259 6
lol the hobo ate the cash
RavenIsTheSex 0
I'm sorry, but I don't believe this at all...