Today, I overheard my 5 year old daughter call a girl in her dance class a slut. Shocked, I asked her where she heard that word. Her response: "I heard you and Daddy say it about her Mommy." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my husband and I sat our 10-year-old daughter down for a chat over her recent cursing. When my husband asked where she'd heard the words, she "innocently" replied, "from mommy's other boyfriend." He took her seriously, accused me of cheating, and hasn't been home since. FML
Today, I overheard my 11-year-old son giving my 8-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, I took my 4-year-old daughter to the local pool for swim lessons. As we walked onto the deck she turned to me and said "Mom, that lady has really big boobs!" The whole pool heard, even the man my daughter was referring to. FML
Today, I came home from work to my 4-year old daughter cussing left and right. I asked her about it; she said that her brother had taught her some words. When I confronted him about the situation, he kicked my shin and screamed, "Stop treating me like a fucking child!" He's 5. FML
Today, my 7-year-old used the word "crap". When I told her that she mustn't use that word because it's rude, she simply replied, "Mother, you should hear the words I use at school." FML
Today, my 2-year-old daughter overheard my wife and I arguing and fixated on one particular insult my wife threw at me. Now my daughter won't stop saying "Daddy a numbnuts", always with a big smile on her face. FML
Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML
Fight Club Penguin
Today, I punched an older woman in the face. I only hit her after she grabbed my 4-year-old daughter and told her to, "stop dancing like a whore!" My daughter was so terrified, she peed her pants. FML
Nice family you've got there
Today, a 7-year-old girl came up to me and told me to go fuck myself. I told her to watch her language or else I'd tell her parents. Her mom happened to be nearby and actually heard the conversation; she came up to me and told me to go fuck myself as well. FML
Stunned silence
Today, my 7 year-old daughter loudly asked in the middle of a supermarket, "Mummy, what's a cunt?" FML
Top comments
xScarletx 0
Yeah YDI for talking like that around your 5 year old
Broc 0
Why are you bad-mouthing people like that at all, let alone in front of a five-year-old? Really, it says more about your own insecurities...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (106)
ilikeboys 0
she'll be fun to raise as a teenager...
simple885 0
send me some nude pics sexy baby
atomick 0
Five year olds are sponges, and you're an idiot.
WomanMonster 0
Eek. Guess you should be more cautious about what you say when she's around! You do deserve it though if you thought she wouldn't pick it up.
PsychoX 0
FYL for being stupid... Really FYL when she is 15 instead of 5. Is it THAT hard to be decent around your own kid? Seriously?
JJawbreakerr 0
Haha. It was only a matter of time. YDI for being judgmental and saying thing like that to around your daughter.
SiLveRStaRLIGHT 0
She'll probably learn how to swear like crazy in middle school anyway.
LysssNysss 1
I agree with 22. Don't say things like that around kids. Kids will repeat anything they hear. YDI for being a moron.
virus04 0
"I heard you and Daddy say it about her Mommy." FML why would you call a 5 yr old girl from your daughters class a ****?? You are retarded. How could you even say that about a 5 yr old girl!!
LiveLoveLife_fml 0
@28... read it again, they called the girl's MOTHER a ****... aha "I heard you and Daddy say it about HERMommy." FML Don't bitch just saying ahha, I'd do that too so your not alone :p aha
omigod 0
what kind of parenting is this? no wonder the world has stooped to the level where it is at now