Today, I'm supposed to start my new job as a Crime Scene Tech. Instead, I managed to electrocute myself with my hairdryer. I'll now have to attempt to explain to them that I really am qualified to safely operate an electrostatic lifting device, and other expensive equipment. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I managed to electrocute myself on a plug socket while I was showing a group of trainee electricians how not to electrocute themselves while rewiring a plug socket. FML
Today, I tried to set up my brand new washer and dryer. How hard can it be, right? After cutting my hand in 3 places on the dryer vent, I finished it off with electrocuting myself. So much for being a domestic goddess. FML
Today, I got electrocuted at work. The boss thinks I'm faking, even though a chunk of my left hand is gone. FML
Today, in an attempt to be frugal, I tried to repair my own sometimes-faulty toaster. Turns out I unplugged the wrong kitchen appliance, which I only discovered by electrocuting myself while pulling it apart. Now it's definitely broken, will need replacing, and I have a burn. FML
Today, I almost got our office burned down by plugging the wrong charger into a laptop cooling fan. Tried to hide the incident and kept it casual but the smoke detector led it to my area and everyone knew I was the culprit. I'm a new hire too. FML
Today, I tried to use a fancy new hairstyling tool and ended up getting my hair tangled in it. I had to cut a chunk of my hair off to free myself. FML
Today, I was replacing some outlets for work and I got surprise-electrified. I threw my wire strippers in the air while yelling, "Oh fuck me." The homeowner and his 2 kids were standing 3 feet away. He was not happy. FML
Today, after spending 2 years growing out my hair, rubbing in oils to make it strong and healthy so I could shave it off and donate to a cancer charity to make wigs, I had a mishap at work with a car's cracked petrol tank. I now have 2nd degree facial burns and like 90% of the hair is burned away. FML
Today, in the bathroom during the ACTs, my hair got stuck in the electric hand dryer. I had to rip my hair out. For future reference, hair + hand dryer = dreadlocks. FML
Today, after months of unemployment, I finally started at a new job. The building burnt down on my very first shift. FML
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Top comments
rosha267 21
They don't have to know about it
finalyearsofhate 22
you shocked yourself op. electrocution leaves the person dead.. not posting to fml.
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Comments (97)
rosha267 21
They don't have to know about it
theten_fml 9
We went through this already! Stop using your blow dryer to warm up your food
alikayanna 0
Or as a heater while you sleep at night. I think this is off of strange addictions!
Codezlol 21
Just tell your boss the truth, I'm sure it won't be too much of a shock to them.
ladyLALAA 29
Love that shoe, I saw that episode, freaky lady. She's sleeps with it the whole night, that noise would drive me crazy.
barbie_9941 13
seriously though why would you even tell them??
poppylamonzo 0
Pshh I do that all the time
Torva_fml 16
Maybe.... You should just stay away from hair dryers....
hawaiianfire 0
You kill yourself from electricity all the time??
TheDrifter 24
Try turning the shower off and maybe get out of it before drying your hair. It saves on CPR.
eatsleepjb 8
29-op obviously didn't die because they wrote the fml...
Deitiy 0
It must have been a very long and hard training period.
petergoh 7
That's what she said.
Dukekamono 5
Electrifying!
MelTheGreat 23
That's no shocker.
iTrevor 5
I'm sure it was an accident, don't put yourself down!
SmittyJA24 26
Some things do not need to be shared with co-workers ... YDI.
KiddNYC1O 22
Thanks for sharing the censorship bar.
finalyearsofhate 22
you shocked yourself op. electrocution leaves the person dead.. not posting to fml.
brianfantana32 10
Wow, you're really stupid
Torva_fml 16
You're joking, right? Please... Dear god..... Let him not be serious..... Lol, 13! You beat me by a couple seconds! Anyways... She's still retarded...
desireev 18
Electrocution does not always kill people. There are many many people who live to tell the tale. Know the facts before you try and correct people..
kofeinisti 6
If she accidentally shocked herself with an electric chair maybe... Electricution is the term used when an electrical current passes through an organism. The voltage/amperage and thus lethality in the current makes no difference.
DocBastard 40
No. NO. NO!! Do you people really not know the difference between an electrocution and a shock? Here, I've gone through the trouble of looking it up for you. Electrocution (v): 1: to execute (a criminal) by electricity. 2: to kill by electric shock. It drives me completely apeshit crazy when people try to call someone stupid and try to "correct" her when the original person is ABSOLUTELY CORRECT. I expect thumbs up for finalyearsofhate and apologies from the rest of you lot.
hawaiianfire 0
28, didn't you explain this the last time some FML claimed electrocution?
TheDrifter 24
Yes. Doc is good like that, I was still laughing too hard to type when he got here.
Ins_Knie 2
Doesn't matter, Doc is right. Dictionary.com is your friend. It comes from 'electr(o) and execute'. As in 'dead'.
perdix 31
Sorry, DeeVee, but electrocution does mean death by electric shock. It is a word formed by combining electricity and execution. It's like drowning. If you drown, you're dead.
Akkuze 9
Electrocution means you've been killed by electricity... Is this what happens when people can't go and check their facts on wikipedia before posting?
VorpikeII 17
Electrocution is when you KILLED by electricity. Get it? KILLED. Jeez you people should buy pocket dictionaries.
RedPillSucks 33
Wikipedia is blacked out today. Maybe that was their excuse. (ok, long shot...)
Torva_fml 16
I guess im sorry... I've grown up having people say "electrocute" when they shocked you with static electricity, or were shocked by anything... Thus why I wasn't aware of the literal meaning. I assume OP is the same, considering they used it the same way.
Torva_fml 16
Just don't tell them...
brianfantana32 10
Just because you messed up with electricity once doesn't mean it will normally, you're fine, I'm pretty sure we've all messed up with electricity once.
eatsleepjb 8
It is 2012 you should change your picture.