Today, I'm 65 years old, and I've been given a bottle of wine produced in the year I was born. The wine tastes foul; not a good omen. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I noticed that my 80-year-old mother has gone through 50+ bottles of my home-made wine. She only moved in with me a month ago. And now I have no wine. FML
Today, I was carded for trying to buy wine and was told the dates were faded, so they wouldn’t be selling it to me, since they suspected I was underage. I work at the vineyard that produces the wine, I’m the head vintner, and I made the wine in the bottle I wasn’t allowed to buy. FML
Today, my son tried my great-grandad's 90 year-old whiskey, didn’t like it, and poured it all down the sink. When I confronted him, he confidently told me it was nasty and must have expired, so he did me a favour and poured it away and washed the bottle. I had to walk away and remind myself I love him. FML
Today, at the winery, my boss proudly made a spectacle of the new, high quality bottles. After over a year of employment without breaking a bottle, I shattered three before lunch. FML
Today, my son had a baby so I poured out the last of the bottle of scotch bought by my grandfather around about 1910. There was just enough for two glasses. I took a sip and spat it out, leading to my son confessing that he drank it as a teenager and replaced it with god knows what brown liquid. FML
Today, it's my 21st birthday. My parents' gift was a case of non-alcoholic beer, to "prepare" me for when I "turn 21." My parents can't even remember how old I am. FML
Today, I received a very expensive bottle of wine for Christmas. My alcoholic mother snuck into my house while I was out and drank the whole bottle. FML
Today, my wife of 10 years bought me a bottle of wine, a wine rack, and a wine accessory kit for my birthday. She knows I don't like wine. FML
Today, I found out that the neighbor I'd given a bottle of wine to for Christmas is a recovering alcoholic. FML
Today, my mother-in-law gave me a bottle of champagne for my birthday. This is the third year in a row she has done this. I'm a recovering alcoholic, and she's well aware of that fact. FML
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Top comments
fucktheworld943 0
65 year olds go on fmylife.com?
Finnboghi 0
I always thought wine aged wonderfully for 5 years or so, then got exponentially worse?
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Comments (44)
Finnboghi 0
I always thought wine aged wonderfully for 5 years or so, then got exponentially worse?
goingsolo211 8
Nah It does if it's bad wine or it's aged wrong. If it's done right it can be good.
Volcan_fml 22
^Correct, if it were aged properly, a 65 year old wine would be amazing.
Sipos 0
Fortunately people mature much better than even the best wine.
fucktheworld943 0
65 year olds go on fmylife.com?
boredworker 0
I call fake becasue 65 year olds DO NOT go on FML
saa994 0
it's not possible for old people to go on the internet? grow up. my grandpa, the same age, uses facebook and stuff. he uses internet ALL THE TIME. not everyone lives in the past.
AaronTkr 0
old people talking about the Internet makes me lol.
xxHaley2011xx 8
My 75 year old grandma uses facebook.
rendezvous1111 3
Hahaha that what i was thinking!
boxbrandon11 20
Haba first thing that popped into my head
inn0centaphid 19
Facebook and FML are two different things
Lubinduba 0
lol shit
mrtrixxxter 0
after about ten years wine starts turning into vinegar.
Wide_white 0
I don't believe you are 65. Either you're lying, or your grandchildren (or some teenager) showed you how to use the internet, and typed this in for you. PROVE ME WRONG!!!
writergirl23 19
Not all 65 year olds are computer illiterate. I know many ppl in their 60's and they are all computer savvy. I even know a few in their late 70's who are.
dolphins_penny 5
my father is computer savvy and 65, excuse me. he was probably using a smart phone before u were in jr high. I like to see u code and make ur own programs like my dad.
Electrolight_fml 0
This is not an FML at all :P
ilybaby1616 0
agree with #5 nd 9 hehehehehe
naku_fml 0
um...ur 65 yrs old and u go on this site...sad..saddd...sadddddd...well i guess old ppl's lives can get f*ked too lol
NixKuH 0
I didn't see an age limit on the Internet? It's for everyone.
niebauer 9
At least he can use the spell check feature.
smoshiee 8
Who let the bratty 10 year old have the computer again?
ddrluna 2
Not a big deal. Wine always tastes foul. =
rapeter 0
I agree