Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, our pregnancy announcement was ruined by my dad who thought it would be funny to grab my boyfriend while yelling, "You got my daughter pregnant, boy! I’m going to kill you!" It wasn’t funny, there was just an awkward silence, and now this precious moment is something I’d rather forget. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents. My dad thought it'd be hilarious to act surprised and ask me if I'd already dumped the girlfriend I introduced him to yesterday. She slapped me and stormed out of the house before my dad could tell her it was a joke. FML
Today, I introduced my dad to my boyfriend. I gave my dad the middle finger and he thumped me on the head, as we've been playfully doing for years. My boyfriend got all mad and tried to fight my dad. FML
Today, my dad walked into my school and joked around saying that he's going to shoot my boyfriend. We all laughed. Except my boyfriend. He was sobbing in a corner. FML
Today, my boyfriend met my parents. Within minutes, my dad managed to verbally sever his balls and reduce him to tears, "just for fun" apparently. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she's pregnant and I did not take it well. She had planned to record my happy reaction for Facebook; instead she got video of me bursting into tears, and trying to talk her into an emergency abortion. She sent it to my parents to punish me. FML
Today, I woke up to my father sobbing his eyes out in the kitchen. Apparently, I screamed, "DON'T TELL THEM I'M PREGNANT!" in my sleep last night. FML
Today, I was using my dad's cell because I had broken mine. I was texting my boyfriend all day when my dad needed his phone back. I forgot to tell my boyfriend that my dad would be using the phone. My boyfriend then texted graphically what he wanted to do to my dad. FML
Today, my immature dad said that I'm a girl, not a woman, so my witty response was, ''I have a period, so I'm pretty sure that makes me a woman.'' My dad stole my phone and sent a text to everyone in my address book, quoting me. Including the guy I like. FML
Today, my boyfriend has never gotten along with my dad, but this afternoon during what I thought was a completely normal conversation, he just stood up, yelled he couldn’t take my dad anymore, punched him in the nose, dumped me, and drove away. FML
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Top comments
Entheatus 13
Your dad is a moron. FYL.
JockeyGirl 0
haha wtf
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Comments (384)
toddlesscott 0
lmfao
0203697 0
holy shit that is to ******* funny what u told your dad he should know a man can't get pregnant and shit unless your boyfriend was a girl b4 then had a sex change!! he would probably tell u if he had a sex change!!HAHA LOL
linnie44 0
dude! I'm so doing this!! :D
tobby16 0
holy moley dad is crazy. fyl
fthku 13
Move out the first chance you get.
pasiphae9 5
Am I the only one that find it disturbing that the Father's first reaction was to lash out at what he assumed to be a pregnant woman?
Dennisse_47 17
I was thinking about that too! that father really has some issues if his first reaction to thinking his daughter is pregnant is to hit her.. I guess someone's not getting a gift for fathers day. O.o
CoachLlama 5
Some things you just don't kid around with. He heard the word boyfriend and prego in the same sentence and his brain put together a different meaning. Lucky the boyfriend wasn't close by.
EnterTheCyclone 0
Who the hell is your dad? Bing Crosby?
Jelizondo 1
that's not a topic you want to joke around with. YDI!! I'm sure all he heard was "pregnant" and that's all he needed to hear.
pasiphae9 5
YDI?? I'm sorry, but even if she was actually telling him she was pregnant, I don't think she would deserve to be hit(bearing in mind that she'd be pregnant and it could cause a miscarriage) and have her property destroyed. Yes, maybe it was a joke made in bad taste. But the fathers reaction was disgusting. If he had yelled at her and just been angry then fine, but you do not hit women who may be pregnant, no matter how furious you are.
Laurennic 2
Since when does Slapping someones face causes a miscarriage? Dad:*slap* daughter:"my fetus!"
hatepineapple 14
Rough physical contact =/= miscarriage. It's not like he punted her in the stomach. A slap across the face isn't going to affect the baby...
alexFYL 11
"My friend is pregnant" and daddy goes all psycho? No matter what words are used and in what context, it's not justified.
sawrules 0
omg my dad would do that 2