Today, I had to pick my son up from school after he beat the crap out of another student. The words that made him go nuts were apparently, "You mad, bro?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I grounded my son after finding out that he's been bullying other kids at school. He got mad and screamed at me, calling me a "bastard". Instead of defending me, my wife got pissed and accused me of having taught our son to swear like that. I can never win. FML
Today, I finally stood up for myself and beat the crap out of a bully at school, as my father told me to do. The kid and I were called to the principal's office, along with our parents. Inside my father's smirk faded when he saw that the kid's mom was his boss. FML
Today, during a heated argument with my son, I lost my temper and called him a son of a bitch. He enthusiastically agreed. FML
Today, I got my ass beat by some kid in my grade. The reason I was targeted? The superintendent, aka my idiot father, suspended him for defending himself in another fight. The kid told me it's not personal, he needed to prove a point that our school doesn't do shit about bullying, As much as I agree with him… FML
Today, I learned my son has been picking on a girl he has a crush on. He apparently went too far, because she finally snapped and beat him up at recess. The teacher, who knew about this from the beginning and actively did nothing, is trying to throw me under the bus for being oblivious to my son's behavior. FML
Today, I picked up my four year old son from daycare. As I was putting him in his car seat, I asked him if he had fun. He yelled, "Shut it, bitch!" FML
Today, after picking up my 6 year-old from school, he said, "Drew said his dad could beat you up." I told him that he needs to respect his own father more and stand up for me. We got home, I looked up his class roster and low and behold, Drew's dad beat me up in junior high. FML
Today, I got called to my son's school again because he punched a girl. Every time he gets in a fight, he justifies it by saying he only hits bullies he catches hurting other kids. His teachers even agree he only hits the bullies like that girl, but it’s becoming a huge problem. FML
Today, I fought back with words against a bully. He cried, and I got detention. FML
Today, a punk-looking college kid was making fun of my mentally handicapped son. Out of anger, I punched him in the face. I got handcuffed and thrown into a police car. The kid stood there laughing and pointing at me. FML
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Top comments
Hamo 5
I don't blame him. I want to punch most of the people who say that anyway
raw_tigahh 2
You jelly?
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Comments (278)
hurrican_fml 0
Apparently he was mad
MaryPoppins88 14
Lol apparently he WAS mad
Taurus_ChicKa 37
UMADBRO? YA,UMAD! lmao!!! Hilarious! But still not a reason to beat the crap out of someone. How old is your son, anyway? Grade school? Middle? Doesn't matter, still a lousy way to respond to a silly statement.
dreamer9614 3
I'm sorry, but that may be one of the. Oat annoying phrases ever, particularly if you're mad. I'd beat that kid too.
hamsterbait 0
Try doing some parenting and keeping your kid off of online gaming. if he denies it call him a squeaker and see how pissed off he gets.
mercsl65 7
id rather pick my kid up from school after a fisticuffs than a hospital!
merser 7
well, he was mad...
wolfbadger 2
school story bro
aisthecoolest 8
Yeah... Them birds just can't stay away :D
FatTony2010 4
You calling' me yella?