Alex
United States
Today, I had to get out my birth certificate to prove to my dad that today is my birthday. This has happened before. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Abington, United States
Today, my father used my birth certificate as a beer coaster. Accident or not, it pretty much perfectly sums up our relationship. FML
Anonymous
St Louis, United States
Deception
Today, I found out that my parents have been lying about my birthday. Now it makes sense how they "lost the birth certificate" or how many photos of me as a baby are dated before I was actually supposed to be born, because "the camera must've glitched, we must've confused the date we wrote in the back of that card." FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I went to go get my driver's license, only to be told that I need a copy of my birth certificate. In order to get the copy of my birth certificate, I need a driver's license or my passport. In order to get a passport, I need a copy of my birth certificate or a drivers license. I have none. FML
Anonymous
Cranbrook, Canada
Bad mom
Today, because of my mom going on a drunken adventure, I now have a FBI file. I'm Canadian and my birth certificate proves I wasn't even alive when she pulled this stuff. FML
Furnando
Close to me
Today, I called my dad asking him to wish me a happy birthday. Yay. FML
leenibeani4
United States
Today, at the eye doctor, they asked for my birth date for the files. My dad answered quickly, "May 28, 1994." It was embarrassing to have to correct him with "April 19, 1993." Who's May 28? Way to go dad. FML
Ange
United States
Today, I had to slowly explain to my daughter why her Facebook profile isn't a valid piece of ID. FML
I-love-my-tea
This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff
Birmingham, United Kingdom
Dangerous implements
Today, I had to show my ID to prove I was over 18. I was buying teaspoons. FML
VedaLynn
United States
Today, it's my 21st birthday and my dad has decided to take away my ID in fear that if I have even one drink to celebrate I'll become a raging alcoholic. FML
keenan
United States
Today, I had to use my driver's license to convince the security guard at a game room that I was a girl. FML
Top comments
omarzrgz 3
Happy birthday :)
linkinpark98 24
Some dad....
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Comments (66)
linkinpark98 24
Some dad....
Bladeofarzeal 6
Happy birthday!
Roevera 14
I know this is irrelevant to the site. but I'm trying to spread the word. Watch the Video "KONY 2012" it's long but very important. Share it everywhere!!! Please!
A100893 30
I'm sorry about your dad. Happy Birthday from a random FMLer! :)
seriouslythat 6
1 my dad never remembers my birthday he only remembers the year.
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Father of the year contestant right there..
ThisIsMyReign 4
I share my birthday with my dad. So, I ask him if it's our birthday yet. :D
Trix_Disorder 20
I wonder if the dad is just a troll dad.
ScenicSubterfuge 39
People like this ruin my day:/ (the dad I mean)
omarzrgz 3
Happy birthday :)
marzipanimal 15
I clicked on the comments just to agree with someone who commented happy birthday.... Ik someone would have alreay.(:
Hyperson 0
OP should friend their father on Facebook. It reminds you about this sort of thing
coldhated 7
He isn't even worth it then
kateindeed 5
Ouch. Buy him a calendar for his birthday with yours marked off.
LaColombianita 26
You'd think he'd remember since it was such a big day in his life.. I guess not though..
iamyummylicious 14
Even worse my mother forgets mine. And she ******* pushed me out of her ******. No small feat either at 11 pounds and 24 inches. And despite living with my parents I haven't spoken to either for a few weeks. I sympathize with you OP. FYL ;(
redbluegreen 41
Perhaps your mother's mind is saving her from the traumatic experience of an eleven pound baby exploding out of her uterus.
iamyummylicious 14
Possibly. I however wonder why she has chosen a career that has her flying around the country 5 days a week. I guess she can't bear to look at me. Damn me for being a such a fat baby. Doesn't excuse my father though.
omarzrgz 3
Tell him the date you lost your virginity, he'll never forget that!
WOGBRO 6
Um he had sexual intercourse on the day she was born? That would be quite pre-mature birth.
ILike_Dancing123 19
He means that OP should tell her dad when she lost her virginity
Jiplo 18
Why are some people so stupid?
ashra_Raivyn 2
Maybe he should get on Facebook like everyone else and get reminded on whose bday it is even if it's someone u don't care about.
DrMime 10
Ya, he's probably just screwing with you. 'Present' him with your birth certificate, blow out any flame if a doubt in his mind and unwrap any issues that persist. I guess he should wear the dunce cap, witch will just make it look like he remembered your party.
memob123 0
Where do you get these ideas?? They're awesome!
immaMonsta 8
#11 Sorry, but which*
DrMime 10
39- ya I noticed after the edit timer ran out, lol
DrMime 10
It's also pun about how the dunce cap can make you look like a witch.
jmoreno 4
I say you forget fathers day altogether happy birthday though hope you have a great day
MigraineurOfLife 15
Wow - there are numerous ways for him not to forget your birthday. I'm sorry OP - your dad should be ashamed of himself!