Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend that taking triple the maximum dosage of painkillers won't actually triple its effects. She rolled her eyes, called me clueless, and said that I should "leave this stuff to the professionals." She's studying to become a doctor. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I told my step-mom that my medication is causing me to lose weight. She looked me up and down and suggested I triple my dosage. FML
Today, the medicine I keep at my desk for headaches is now gone thanks to my coworker who took the last 6 Advil at once. Her reasoning? "You're thin, so you wouldn't need them anyway. I'm twice your size, so I needed twice the dose." FML
Today, my girlfriend came back from visiting her family. She'd forgotten to take her pills, and decided to "catch up" by taking almost a week's worth of birth control and prescription pills. She's fine, but I had to convince the ER staff that she's not suicidal, just stupid. FML
Today, my roommate was complaining about a headache, so I offered her some aspirin. She looked at me like I was stupid and said, "Uh… That stuff's only for heart attacks." I'm living with an idiot. FML
Today, my mother won't give me any painkillers for my migraine. She believes that "When medicine goes into your stomach, the acids stop the medicine from working" and that "It's all in people's heads when medicine works". FML
Today, after a 20-minute conversation, I'm still unable to convince my grandmother that Tylenol and Acetaminophen are the same thing. I just graduated med school. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me, panicking. Apparently he had a headache, but wasn't concentrating on what tablets he grabbed, and accidentally took tablets for "relief of period pain". He was convinced he was going to grow ovaries overnight. FML
Today, after getting my wisdom teeth pulled, I woke up from a much needed nap realizing I should take my pain medication. My mother then told me she had thrown them out so I wouldn't get addicted and become a drug dealer. FML
Today, I went to the hospital for crippling back pain that made it impossible to walk. The doctor was more interested in telling me off for not taking a pill that he admitted doesn't help acute pain. He then gave me an injection that wore off in an hour, and sent me home, telling me to take over the counter meds. FML
Today, I kindly explained to a client that she had calculated her CD interest wrong. She kindly responded that, as a nurse, she would never give me medical treatment if I was involved in a car accident. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
rg350dx 29
Write this moment down and remind her of it in four years and ask again who's clueless.
DocBastard 40
Cryptic17 - No, the thing that will increase is the concentration if the drug in her bloodstream, and when you increase the plasma concentration, you generally increase the response. SapphireVelvet is right - OP IS clueless.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (168)
SMHsohard 22
You need to find out what she's basing this on instead of just assuming she's an idiot. The longer someone uses pain medication, the more the body tolerates the dose and the less effective it becomes (physical dependence, not to be confused with addiction, which is when a narcotic is taken to get high, not to relieve pain). So, yes, sometimes people with severe pain are given larger doses than the "average" person. I've seen Hospice patients on morphine doses that would have me in a coma, or dead, and they're still able to function.
deloria_fml 22
It's actually not just tolerance that is important with chronic pain patients and opiates, but also the fact that if you are in pain, you're going to burn through the chemicals a lot more quickly. You won't even get high if you are in genuine pain, even if you are taking a larger dose than someone who isn't and is getting high. That's why people with chronic pain have an addiction rate of about 2%.
blessedbylife 6
if you take 3x what you are told to take it will greatly increase the (high)or effect or kill her depending what type of painkiller it is
alliem199521 10
Hey fucktards why do u think that they will give one person a higher dosage than another? Because the person needs more of an affect (or effect) and therefore giving a person triple the dosage will raise how much they work. Its common sense... Idiots.
CharresBarkrey 16
That's not why they adjust dosage from person to person...
Ultimate_No 7
Whew. Seems like you ran out of your chill pills.
KLeePrice 11
No, they adjust dosage so the bigger person with a higher tolerance get the same effects as the smaller person with a lower tolerance.
EvilUndead 9
35, Until you learn the difference between "effect" and "affect", you're not in position to call other people idiots.
ViviMage 40
Cut her a break! She is doing her own case study of what happens to her liver after an overdose of painkillers! Then she'll do her own autopsy! ....oh wait.
PharmGirl14 8
It depends on what medication it is and whether the recommended dose was from the back of an OTC medication or a prescription. It also depends on whether she's had pharmacology classes yet and knows the pharmcodynamics/kinetics of the drug she is taking. However, all medical professionals -both doctors and pharmacists- should never self-diagnose and prescribe for themselves... especially in pain circumstances!
Adhdkid107 9
Someone needs to read up on their studies....
MzZombicidal 36
I hope I never run into her when I need help. That is, if she makes it.
angelitared 27
She must be blonde!! Bahah!
AKjonesy 5
I agree with her, if taking 3X the amount doesn't triple the effect, why do doctors prescribe 800 mg ib profen and not just give everyone OTC 200 mg??? Lawyered!!
mickiethec 2
She's right, the "maximum" on the bottle is just a precaution. Kind of like how expiration dates on food are set a lot earlier than they really need to be. It's so the customer can't find a lame excuse to sue the company. Sorry, but you are the stupid one here.