LunaCrow
Shakopee, United States
Today, I had a friend tell me all about how being a vegan was so great. They were eating eggs. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
meat lover
Never gonna happen
Today, my girlfriend woke me up by saying, "Good morning! We're going to be vegans from now on." FML
blondetergent
Singapore
Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm a vegan. She replied, "So, you're allergic to meat?" FML
Go vegan!
United States
One step beyond
Today, I realized I've become a stereotypical militant vegan when I told a friend that we should start raising Lone Star ticks and dropping them around town so we could spread meat allergies and force people to eat vegan. FML
Anonymous
Canada
Leave me alone
Today, my brother turned into a fanatical vegan, and while I was eating my scrambled eggs, sat across from me glaring and whispering, "fried embryo, amniotic fluid" the entire time. I have a feeling i'll be eating most of my meals in my room from now on. FML
fuckedbyahipster
Finland
Today, I was lectured by a self-professed vegan over my "barbaric" eating habits, in between her scarfing down a tuna fish sandwich. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, the unhealthiest person I know, weighing in at around 350 pounds told me she was now a vegan. I then told her the Cheese-Itz, as well as the leather boots she was wearing wasn't vegan. She said I was wrong. I'm a nutritionist. FML
Sad vegan girl
New York, United States
Disconnect
Today, I told my younger sister that meat comes from cute animals like chickens and cows, hoping she'd want to be vegan like me. Instead, she laughed and made up a song about how chickens turn into tenders and cows turn into cheeseburgers. I ended up being the one who got upset. FML
kohler9790
United States
Today, I had to tell my wife that the new "vegan" diet she has put us on is not working with my body. It's not the horrible gas, hot shits, or constant hunger that made me realize this. It was the dream I had about fried chicken that did. FML
Cheryl
Go, Vegan!
Today, my vegan sister told my kids where meat and dairy products come from, in a very detailed way. They now refuse to eat meat, and want to, "rescue all the poor animals." FML
jj.
Digging my heels in
Today, my family dragged me to a steakhouse, knowing full well I'm vegan. I sat there, with my sad little salad, watching as they stuffed themselves with burned animal flesh and laughed at me. They wonder why I hate them all. FML
Top comments
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
Tell them you agree with them while eating a steak
llalala_fml 19
I hope you broke it to them
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Comments (97)
someguyhere 12
I love meeting these vegan and finding almost none of them are truly vegan. LOL My fav- "Jello is vegan"
ajs1987 15
Please tell me no one is truly that dumb.
Flyndaran 10
Hate to break it to you, but there is such a thing as vegetable gelatin. I know it's a misnomer by definition, but then so is turkey bacon.
Nordiclifestyle 3
Maybe they just felt so eggstatic for being a vegan! You should have yolked them with your better knowledge.
Tannasgh 22
Well...once you scramble an embryo, they will probably end up as vegetables anyway...:P
steam_engenius 21
I don't really understand why vegans boycott eggs when chickens lay them no matter what, and chickens even eat their own eggs sometimes. I can understand not buying grocery store eggs, especially if you're vegan, but I don't see the problem if you own chickens who are happy and are laying unfertilized eggs that you happen to eat. Just saying.
VeganDarkLight 31
While I totally understand your point, there are still some reasons why me and most other vegans don't think that way. Firstly, I don't like the idea of "owning" any animals (except for rescue and shelter pets) and keeping them locked-in. Secondly, you would have to buy the hens from a breeder or somewhere else where they most definitely kill the male chicken the day after birth. And last but not least, health aspects (like cholesterol) and distaste for any animal products might also play a role.
Flyndaran 10
Have you seen what they do to unwanted chicks from an egg farm? They send them through a horrific garbage disposal type machine. Don't delude yourself into thinking farm raised anything has a hunky dory life. It's like thinking a human employed business would treat workers better than they legally have to.
emilyg2014 14
Eggcellent.
Sparx1_1 16
I had the same thing happen recently with a co-worker who claims to be a vegetarian - yet there she was at the company x-mas party scarfing down a full quarter chicken - meat, fat skin and gravy on everything. There was nothing left but a couple of completely cleaned off bones. Meat eaters aren't that thorough. Some people are just hypocrites
Flyndaran 10
Maybe they don't eat mammals but are either too stupid or tired to explain fully. I once had an argument with my "brother in law" about my not eating mammals. He kept asking why I eat chickens then. The rest of us had to explain the obvious to him.
PopcornTimes 14
I can't even facepalm enough.
skippydoda 32
They sell egg substitutes, they look like scrambled eggs but actually are vegan friendly.
Flyndaran 10
Try being something that doesn't have a name; I don't eat mammals. People try to come up with a word salad appended to vegetarian. But that's just silly.
joshtapp 17
The hardest part of eating vegetables is deciding what to do with the wheelchair