Today, I had a conversation about how Victoria Beckham ate fruit salad for her birthday, as if it was an important subject. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was invited over by my girlfriend's parents, but I couldn't bring myself to take part in their discussions. During a lull in conversation, I noticed everyone was staring at me. Covering myself while I tried to think of something to say, I grabbed an apple and took a bite. It was plastic. FML
Today, I got a call from my daughter's school. Apparently, she was learning about the food pyramid and when she was asked to identify what she had eaten the day before, she said "dog food". FML
Today, I was talking to my grandma and I mentioned the fact that tomatoes are technically fruit. It's been an hour and she's still yelling, accusing me of lying to her. FML
Today, the only cute girl in my office made fun of me because I'm 27 and bring fruit cups with my lunch. FML
Today, I was excited to sleep in on my day off. My girlfriend woke me up at 6 am. To bring up an argument from a week ago. An argument about salad dressing. FML
Today, I was working in the produce department at my work. A lady came in to return some mangos. I asked her what the problem with the mangoes was. She said she didn't like the way they were talking to her. FML
Today, my mother had a Kitty Party (sort of), and I was in charge of the tea and snacks. I was so busy I didn't pay attention to their discussion. After everything was done, I heard my mother talking about my poop colour and how unhealthy it was. FML
Today, I overheard a little girl ask her mom if the round lady in purple was pretending to be a giant eggplant. I was the lady in purple. FML
Today, I had a friend tell me all about how being a vegan was so great. They were eating eggs. FML
Today, my four year-old very loudly asked me if the little person she saw at the shops was like that because he didn't eat his vegetables. He definitely heard. FML
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Top comments
daftPunKt 4
Get your own life
2856B9BD 9
Omg, she EATS?! ..*sarcasm*
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Comments (155)
LigerFan 1
It's not?
jackass_v 7
You need a hobby, pal.
theoreticalnerd 0
As if it *were* an important subject. I'm surprised nobody beat me to it.
kenzie20 6
Fruit salad, yummy yummy ~ the wiggles
dobbyisfreeeeeee 10
Fruit salad, yummy yummy!
xIBleedPurplex16 0
Bieber has perfect abs(;
non_finisher 9
F*** it
tomtato 10
OMG, how could you not know that. She eats lettuce season with salt, tomtatoes with thousand island topped off with cucumbers. HOW CAN YOU NOT KNOW THIS. 2012 has come, the end is near. REPENT AND KNOW YOUR SALADS.
Huddisher 10
Cue Wiggles "Fruit Salad" song.
Andrei I 9
how did this even get on this website??!