Today, I got my own row on an almost full transatlantic flight. All it took was having food poisoning two hours into the flight. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I fell violently ill half an hour into a flight. I got sick so suddenly that I projectile vomited all over my clothes and the seat in front of me, and to top it all off, I also got diarrhea. Eight more hours to go. FML
Today, I have four flights. I spent last night projectile vomiting with food poisoning. By the time I got to the airport it had progressed to liquid diarhea. Two flights in, I got my period. FML
Today, I have an eight hour transatlantic flight and the person sitting next to me has already filled his third sick bag. This wouldn't be quite so bad were we not still at the terminal with passengers still boarding the plane. FML
Today, on my airplane ride home, the woman next to me wasn't feeling too well. She pulled out the air sickness bag to throw up into and missed. Her vomit splattered all over the seat in front of her and all over me. We were both covered in puke. And that was only my first of two flights. FML
Today, I was on an early flight home after a night of drinking. I was sat in my seat when I started feeling sweaty and nauseous. I grabbed the puke bag and started gagging, then puking, and a really loud fart came out. Everyone heard it. The attendant switched me seat to sit alone. FML
Today, I discovered the worst possible situation in which to get explosive diarrhea: on a 9-hour transatlantic flight. Next to an attractive single guy. FML
Today, I was on a 12-hour transatlantic flight. I asked the flight attendant where the rancid smell was coming from. The guy sitting next to me started laughing, saying, "Sorry, something I ate is not agreeing with me." This was hour one of the flight. FML
Today, I went on a long flight. I was fortunate enough to sit next to a great girl. However, she must have thought I was not so great, because she moved to the empty seat across the aisle. Next to my dad. Who then told stories about how I always get motion sickness on airplanes. I then threw up. FML
Today, I had a several-hour-long flight. I was put in a seat at the very back of the plane. Before the plane even lifted off, a woman took a dump in the bathroom that I stank for the rest of the flight. Whenever I tried to get some sleep, the flight attendant walked past, savagely jostling me. FML
Today, I was sick on an airplane. As we were taking off, I felt like I was ready to hurl. I was sitting in the window seat and was unable to get up in time to go to the bathroom so I was forced to grab the nearest container to puke in. It was a glass of juice belonging to the woman next to me. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Oh man, I know what I'm doing next time I'm traveling by plane. No more being sardined between two fat guys.
youngmessi252525 20
Way to look at the bright side op.
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Comments (24)
youngmessi252525 20
Way to look at the bright side op.
wanted_2_want 40
Some perks of being sick.
Welshite 40
Oh man, I know what I'm doing next time I'm traveling by plane. No more being sardined between two fat guys.
Tripartita 45
Coincidentally, "sardine between two fat guys" is one potential meal you could eat to get food poisoning.
Welshite 40
Thanks for that, Trip. I think I'm gonna be sick, and I'm had no plans to travel today.
Kurliez408 32
that sucks. i had the flu, an unknown ear infection and sat next a loudly snoring smelly man on a 12 hour flight. i know your pain.
Garfield9441 2
Could be worse
Tripartita 45
You could post this on /any/ FML. None of them are the absolute worst things imaginable.
chuka81 27
Challenge accepted. Today, my wife ate my dog, set fire to my house and eloped with my best friend taking all my life savings with her. FML.
Tripartita 45
No, no, no, it COULD be worse. "Today, my wife ate my dog out, flooded my house with an incurable virus, and eloped with my father after framing me for a series of robberies. I just found out I'm somehow pregnant. FML"
fmlperson8264 16
Today, my wife set fire to the entire world and everybody died. She's about to kill me now. FML
klutzyduck1 24
Hey me too. I was on leave from Iraq and vomited right after take off on the way to Australia. Scored the whole row of the flight attendants seats for the entire flight. It was pretty great...after I changed and got over the whole embarrassment thing. It's all about the silver linings!
tranced_ 45
good thing they didn't asked you to leave. .
chuka81 27
Sir, I'm sorry but you're too sick for this flight. Here's your parachute. Now follow me to the emergency exit.
Avi8r 22
Something tells me not a lot of thought went into this comment.
soulreaper12296 28
Well look at his profile pic. I doubt there is any thought put into anything he does.
Iwannarock1 19
Chuka81, just stop trolling for likes.
onlinetroll 14
Lol considering the possibilities if your future you should prob have food poisoning more often..
Wonthebread 20
Totally worth it.
Rammer3500 23
Totally worth it