Today, I got in a huge fight with my pregnant wife because I cannot consent to naming our future daughter Paprika. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I spoke to my hormonal pregnant wife about baby names. I told her I liked the name "Tabitha", and she went into a full rage about how all letters have textures, colours and emotions and how T is an evil letter. Apparently it's orange, plastic, and a needle trying to stab her eyes out. FML
Today, me and my husband are having our first big marital argument. Our baby still doesn’t have a name, all because I want to call her a normal name and he wants to call her some obscure name from an anime he really likes. I’ve never seen him this stubborn about anything this stupid. FML
Today, my wife and I have been in the same massive argument for two weeks. We agreed when we were dating that we couldn’t think of anything worse than having kids, we married on the basis we would never want kids. Now, a year later, she wants a baby. FML
Today, I had to yet again tell my mother-in-law that I wasn't going to name my unborn baby "Ermintrude" after her late mother. My husband told me to stop being difficult, and that he agrees that it would be nice. FML
Today, my pregnant wife and I got separated while out shopping. She ended up having meltdown and crying so hard the manager had to call me over the PA. FML
Today, my girlfriend blew up at me for a comment I had made several weeks ago about not wanting kids. Then, she told me that she's pregnant. After consoling her and telling her that whatever we do, we'll do it together, she further explained that she's not sure if it's mine. FML
Today, my French wife chose the name of our unborn baby girl. She wants to call her Fanny and won't change her mind. FML
Today, I admitted to my best friend that I was having second thoughts about getting married and was probably going to break up with him. Unfortunately, my fiance's daughter, who I absolutely adore, overheard the conversation and threw a huge screaming tantrum asking why I didn't want to be her mommy anymore. FML
Today, my wife is blaming me for us having to abort our baby because the amnio showed it would have severe disabilities. I supported her every decision, but apparently me agreeing with her was actually me not wanting to fight harder for our baby to live, hence, it’s all my fault. FML
Today, my wife, the budding environmentalist, who is also 6 months pregnant, threatened to leave me because according to her I'm responsible for the world's deforestation. I'd only drawn her a picture of her with our baby-to-be. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Welshite 40
Let me guess. You and your wife are known as Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper. Remember to name your son Cinnamon when the time comes.
BlueBaronBitch 22
Maybe she could have grown up to be one of the Spice Girls
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (98)
Welshite 40
Let me guess. You and your wife are known as Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper. Remember to name your son Cinnamon when the time comes.
arano 29
Cinnamon sounds like a stripper name.
korylabauve 7
but cinnamon is a black stripper name. doesn't work for a son...
socialproduct 19
Ahh #1, you beat me to it. Surprisingly you seem to be the only person who made the reference
Brazski 6
Dude, come on, when the thyme comes!
trucker2 33
Gee thanks better run out and buy my pole... Wtf. Love Cinnamon
nicolai44 12
Hey, that's *DR.* Pepper to you! Sorry, too obvious, couldn't resist. I'll try harder next time.
Flyndaran 10
This is the internet, so Cinnamon is a cat's name. lol....lolcat.
ohSNAPyall 27
Sage advice.
BlueBaronBitch 22
Maybe she could have grown up to be one of the Spice Girls
analhehskb 5
Spicy
ENDmySUFFERING 19
Calm down, she's just salty.
TrebleMajor 13
You should name her Ginger instead. Your wife can name her after a spice and you get a somewhat normal name
PencilTips 19
I hope the child won't turn out to be a redhead then. Otherwise, he would be constantly bullied for his/her name everytime introducing themselves.
Capteen_fml 16
Why is 17 getting down voted? It's not a nice fact of life, but let's face it, kids are ******* cruel when they want to be.
ChopSuey444 20
My best friend's mom is a redhead named Ginger. I have literally never once in 10 years coincided the two.
ber4fun 23
Don't worry, I'm sure you will find a different unique name you can both agree on.
MandieL 27
Just tell her that the kids will call her "pap smear" as a nickname. That might change her mind. Or if she's a GOT fan, "Reek" as a nickname might do the trick.
manuwish 9
well ain't that a deal breaker..haha OP it's not much worse than being called Apple..with a name like that she's sure to spice up our lives ;)) haha
hellobobismyname 24
... Are you really talking about a child in that way?
hellobobismyname 24
I figured he was talking about Apple, who is the daughter of Gwyneth Paltrow, and I just thought it was creepy him saying she was sure to grow up to spice up our lives with double winking faces. I just found it creepy because I wouldn't want anyone talking about my kid that way, if I had one. Never said anything about sexually abusing a fetus, wtf?
yerawizardlizzy 27
I dunno, but I recently read an article about a guy who was arrested for sending photos of his wife's ultrasound to an undercover cop posing as a pedophile. So I guess it's serious enough?
soulreaper12296 28
Please please please stand your ground and don't let that happen. There's already so many stupid names out there, we don't need another.
cheyluvsturtles 30
she's pregnant and most likely feeling all sorts of hormone changes. She will probably change her mind when she realizes that that's a ridiculous name. but if not then f your daughters life